recent date
acasey0123
Posts: 640 Member
So I just went on a date with a guy I met back in Jan but he never texted me til a couple of weeks ago ( I know weird, right?) asking me to go to the movies I said yes then this past weekend I went out to dinner with him. It was just competly akward. Not only was he sitting really weird but he kept going on about how his friends have kids and are married (he's 29) and how he wanted them (its a first real talking date like come on) then he was teasing me how I picked a healthy dish (had 500 calories) and how I wanted to go to the gym after dinner and that I exercise everyday. Needless to say, I'm not talking to him if he cant honor that Im trying to better myself.
I feel like I attract people who are just plain horrible, I dont have crazy standards except to treat me right and the past four guys have failed... where are all the guys that are dateable?!?!?!
I feel like I attract people who are just plain horrible, I dont have crazy standards except to treat me right and the past four guys have failed... where are all the guys that are dateable?!?!?!
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He was sitting weird? Haha, I've got a mental image of some squirmy dude in my head. Sounds like a blast.0
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hahhhha yea he kept like tapping his foot, his feet kept getting into my "foot space," he would put his hands on the seat with straight arms and then push out his chest or turn facing sidewards and im there thinking WTF would you just sit still?0
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i wouldnt call him horrible, he might have just been nervous. guys can be really stupid when they are nervous. i generally give awkward guys at least 2 chances. i figure first date might just be nerves if it's the same or worse on date 2 then there's no date 3, but if there's some improvement then i might consider a date 3 ...maybe.
none of the guys i've ever seriously dated have been super suave on date 1. they try to be but end up not being anywhere near as smooth as it played out in their heads :laugh:0 -
I'm 29, and I have married friends/lower level acquaintances with kids. More of the periphery of my social circle. I don't talk about that on first dates.
Awkward dates happen.
The way you describe the sitting is something I've never experienced and found it difficult to picture.0 -
Did he explain why he didn't ask you out for nine months?0
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Sounds like it could be a combination of nerves (foot tapping and footsies) and having a pain in his back. I would have flat out asked him if he was alright, but I sometimes don't have a filter.hahhhha yea he kept like tapping his foot, his feet kept getting into my "foot space," he would put his hands on the seat with straight arms and then push out his chest or turn facing sidewards and im there thinking WTF would you just sit still?
I'm also of the mind to give a pass on the first date for all awkwardness. Not genuine weirdness that is clearly their character, but if it's just something that could be first date-specific and chalked up to nerves, I think it's worth a second chance.0 -
maybe he had painful gas and was grabbing on to the front seat to keep from farting?
did he go to the bathroom a lot? if so i'd think gas... or a coke problem :laugh:
and yeah, what time loop did he fall in where you didnt hear from him in 9 months? i'd have jokingly asked him if he had a baby or something lol0 -
Did he explain why he didn't ask you out for nine months?
Yeah, this. Unless I am reading it wrong but 9 months?0 -
hahhhha yea he kept like tapping his foot, his feet kept getting into my "foot space," he would put his hands on the seat with straight arms and then push out his chest or turn facing sidewards and im there thinking WTF would you just sit still?
Sounds like nerves or an active mind? Perhaps he was bored? Or he felt uncomfortable? (either physically or mentally)
Florian's leg jitters up and down (sometimes) when he's talking to me (I know he wont mind me telling you this.....lol). I put it down to me boring him ****less and he's actually thinking about something else..........:laugh:
Sounds like the guy is desperate to marry someone and get on with having kids. Yes, guys get broody too!
If you dont like him, then move on. It's untrue to say ALL guys treat you badly, because there will be one that won't. You just need to stop settling!! :flowerforyou:0 -
hahhhha yea he kept like tapping his foot, his feet kept getting into my "foot space," he would put his hands on the seat with straight arms and then push out his chest or turn facing sidewards and im there thinking WTF would you just sit still?
Florian's leg jitters up and down (sometimes) when he's talking to me (I know he wont mind me telling you this.....lol). I put it down to me boring him ****less and he's actually thinking about something else..........:laugh:
My dad does the leg shake too. We always had to tell him to stop since he was always jiggling the dinner table. It is just a unconcisious habbit.
I wouldn't say it was a horrible guy but he was probably nervious. I would have asked why he didn't contact you for 9 months.0 -
but he kept going on about how his friends have kids and are married (he's 29) and how he wanted them (its a first real talking date like come on)
This sounds like something a girl would be more likely to do than a guy.
The major red flag would be waiting 9 months to contact you. I would never give someone the time of day if they dropped off the radar for 9 months and suddenly wanted to go out.
In short, red flags all over the place in this date..0 -
The major red flag would be waiting 9 months to contact you. I would never give someone the time of day if they dropped off the radar for 9 months and suddenly wanted to go out.
This...............0 -
Yes, but wouldn't that be reason for some people not to go out with him at all... but the OP DID go out on a date with him! I would want to find out what happened, but if he's not terrible, it wouldn't stop me from going on a second date with the guy. Life happens, people get caught up in things like work and family and time passes, or maybe he met someone and it didn't work out, so now he's free. I wouldn't exclude someone over that. Everyone I date has been in previous relationships, as have I, so that's not really a big deal. Unless he was serving time...The major red flag would be waiting 9 months to contact you. I would never give someone the time of day if they dropped off the radar for 9 months and suddenly wanted to go out.
This...............0 -
This sounds like something a girl would be more likely to do than a guy.
The major red flag would be waiting 9 months to contact you. I would never give someone the time of day if they dropped off the radar for 9 months and suddenly wanted to go out.
In short, red flags all over the place in this date..
Geez, Mike, I guess a guy can't want the family like a girl would
I agree with Mike on this one. Red flags EVERYWHERE. Being awkward on the date isn't an issue if all the rest of this was explainable. It doesn't seem to be based on what you've shared OP. Most of us know in our gut if something is off and post here for confirmation or thoughts to ponder. I'm guessing you know something isn't right....0 -
I feel like I attract people who are just plain horrible, I dont have crazy standards except to treat me right and the past four guys have failed... where are all the guys that are dateable?!?!?!
This seems a bit harsh, just because he's not a match for you doesn't make him horrible or "undateable". I went on a date with a guy last night that has social anxiety like I do and we were both crazy fidgety and weird and kept accidentally bringing up "inappropriate" conversation, but it was fun because that's just how we are.
I definitely would have asked him where he disappeared to - and if the answer wasn't acceptable I wouldn't have gone on another date again unless I -really- liked him from before.0 -
he told me that he didnt contact me for that long bc he was busy with work (ummm it takes 10 seconds to send a text.)0
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he told me that he didnt contact me for that long bc he was busy with work (ummm it takes 10 seconds to send a text.)
Busy with work for 9 months............right.........:noway: The only answer I'd accept it if he was in the military and was deployed outside the US....even then if he was really into you, he'd make an effort to contact you.0 -
Theyre out there. Just keep faith!!0
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he told me that he didnt contact me for that long bc he was busy with work (ummm it takes 10 seconds to send a text.)
Busy with work for 9 months............right.........:noway: The only answer I'd accept it if he was in the military and was deployed outside the US....even then if he was really into you, he'd make an effort to contact you.
This and I would jokingly say something like are you sure you weren't out having a baby? (but that is the smarta$$ in me)0 -
I dont see an issue with the 9 months. He obviously met someone else and it didnt work out.
So what? People off dating sites 'choose' all the time between 2 or 3 or 10 people. Get real! Everyone does it! And Americans seem to condone dating multiple people at the same time anyhow? So how about you meet 4 people in one week, you click with 2, you pursue 1 for 6 months, then you ring up the other one you clicked with cos that didnt work out............ :flowerforyou:0
