What would you do in this situation
oregonzoo
Posts: 4,251 Member
Hi All! I'm Angela. New to this board... Getting married October 11, 2013. Clearly I couldn't be more excited.
We got engaged about 4 months ago, and have had a venue in mind. Now my fiance lives in NJ where we are getting married, and I live in Georgia. So, it's not easy for me to get there to see venues whenever I like.
We'd planned to look at the venue we really wanted, last weekend.
He also has some friends who got engaged a few weeks ago. After they got engaged they asked my fiance what we were thinking we would go with. He told them the name of the place.
They went and looked at it that weekend, and then booked it. Now personally, I don't care. We could have both gotten married at the same place and it doesn't matter to me. I just want everybody to be happy and have a great day.
They had already asked my fiance not to get married there. He told them it was our favorite place, and he had told them about us wanting it long before.... so he couldn't promise we wouldn't book there and in fact we planned on it.
At a wedding last weekend, they both pulled me aside and asked me not to get married there. Came up a with a million different reasons why. Gave me (more expensive lol) alternatives.
Now, I don't care about us getting married in the same place. I don't care that they want to get married where we already told them we'd planned on getting married.
And had I actually lived there we would have booked it long before they were engaged.
So do I be the bigger person, and not get married where I really want to get married... just to appease these people.
Or do I say forget it and get married where I want to?
*** Sorry this is so long!
We got engaged about 4 months ago, and have had a venue in mind. Now my fiance lives in NJ where we are getting married, and I live in Georgia. So, it's not easy for me to get there to see venues whenever I like.
We'd planned to look at the venue we really wanted, last weekend.
He also has some friends who got engaged a few weeks ago. After they got engaged they asked my fiance what we were thinking we would go with. He told them the name of the place.
They went and looked at it that weekend, and then booked it. Now personally, I don't care. We could have both gotten married at the same place and it doesn't matter to me. I just want everybody to be happy and have a great day.
They had already asked my fiance not to get married there. He told them it was our favorite place, and he had told them about us wanting it long before.... so he couldn't promise we wouldn't book there and in fact we planned on it.
At a wedding last weekend, they both pulled me aside and asked me not to get married there. Came up a with a million different reasons why. Gave me (more expensive lol) alternatives.
Now, I don't care about us getting married in the same place. I don't care that they want to get married where we already told them we'd planned on getting married.
And had I actually lived there we would have booked it long before they were engaged.
So do I be the bigger person, and not get married where I really want to get married... just to appease these people.
Or do I say forget it and get married where I want to?
*** Sorry this is so long!
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Replies
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Get married where you want to get married, it's got nothing to do with them where you decide to get married, it's yours and your fiances wedding, not theirs. Both wedding will be completely different anyway, I expect, despite the venue.
My friend got married in June, and I think had we decided to go with the same venue she would be really happy as she had an amazing day there and would want the same for me. I'd feel the same way if it was vice versa.
What were her 'reasons' if I may ask??0 -
She told us we couldn't meet the minimum. She told us she "felt sorry for her fiance" since there would be two weddings at the same place.
http://www.davidscountryinn.com/ Here's the place I love(it's just us....)
and the alternative I found
http://www.doolansshoreclub.com/
We could make the alternative work, since we both love the ocean and got married on a cruise. But... meh it's not the same.0 -
Oh my god hunny, it's your wedding!! Get married where you want to get married. In the end they can't stop you and they shouldn't either! It's definitely your choice and they should be fine especially since you are looking around for other places but ultimately this is the place you want to get married!!0
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She told us we couldn't meet the minimum. She told us she "felt sorry for her fiance" since there would be two weddings at the same place.
http://www.davidscountryinn.com/ Here's the place I love(it's just us....)
and the alternative I found
http://www.doolansshoreclub.com/
We could make the alternative work, since we both love the ocean and got married on a cruise. But... meh it's not the same.
Who cares if there's 2 wedding at the same place!? Why does that matter!? Book the wedding day of your dreams. If it meant that much to them to have a 'different' wedding to yours, then why book the venue that you wanted?? She's sounds really selfish to be honest..
I like the 1st venue that you linked the best by the way
GO FOR IT!!0 -
Hi All! I'm Angela. New to this board... Getting married October 11, 2013. Clearly I couldn't be more excited.
We got engaged about 4 months ago, and have had a venue in mind. Now my fiance lives in NJ where we are getting married, and I live in Georgia. So, it's not easy for me to get there to see venues whenever I like.
We'd planned to look at the venue we really wanted, last weekend.
He also has some friends who got engaged a few weeks ago. After they got engaged they asked my fiance what we were thinking we would go with. He told them the name of the place.
They went and looked at it that weekend, and then booked it. Now personally, I don't care. We could have both gotten married at the same place and it doesn't matter to me. I just want everybody to be happy and have a great day.
They had already asked my fiance not to get married there. He told them it was our favorite place, and he had told them about us wanting it long before.... so he couldn't promise we wouldn't book there and in fact we planned on it.
At a wedding last weekend, they both pulled me aside and asked me not to get married there. Came up a with a million different reasons why. Gave me (more expensive lol) alternatives.
Now, I don't care about us getting married in the same place. I don't care that they want to get married where we already told them we'd planned on getting married.
And had I actually lived there we would have booked it long before they were engaged.
So do I be the bigger person, and not get married where I really want to get married... just to appease these people.
Or do I say forget it and get married where I want to?
*** Sorry this is so long!
Defo book the wedding where you want it, if they dont want 2 weddings in the same place then they shouldnt have booked it since they already knew it was your choice
Id tell um to sod off and book it up asap xxx 0 -
I called and booked the second place yesterday...
As upset as I about about how they handled it, I want to be the bigger person. If they feel us marrying in the same place would slight their wedding, well I'd hate for them to feel like that.
People hold on to that kind of resentment forever.
And I"ve convinced myself I am in love enough with the new place not to care. 0 -
As long as your happy then were happy!! Congratulations on booking a venue!! YAY!!!0
