Meeting the parents?
JanieJack
Posts: 3,831 Member
What does introducing your SO (or potential SO) mean to you, if anything?
What would if mean (to you) if you were getting to know someone and s/he introduced you to his/her parents?
What would if mean (to you) if you were getting to know someone and s/he introduced you to his/her parents?
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I have strict traditional Asian parents straight from the motherland and they'd love for me to marry a nice Hmong man. I wouldn't introduce a guy to them unless he and I were very serious. Just don't want to bother with the hassle of lectures and looks of disappointment each time I date someone. I was with my ex for 4.5 years and didn't even introduce him to the folks until almost year 3. They're a lot more lenient these days though as I think they've given up on me finding a Hmong guy.
Now with this whole facebook thing and everyone and their mothers being on there.....if you're dating someone and they're on your friend list and their folks are on their list...ignore them or introduce yourself electronically?0 -
At the right time, I would be excited to meet my SO's parents.
I would only introduce to my mom when I was pretty sure that I would be proposing. Other family members, maybe earlier, depending upon if they were in town. Most of my family lives far from me.
Good topic Janie!0 -
I would be excited for that because I think it does mean something. I've literally never introduced anyone to my parents because there has never been anyone serious enough to bother. My mom would probably die of shock at this point. Until a few years ago, I think she thought I was still a virgin, haha...0
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I would be excited for that because I think it does mean something. I've literally never introduced anyone to my parents because there has never been anyone serious enough to bother. My mom would probably die of shock at this point. Until a few years ago, I think she thought I was still a virgin, haha...
Haha this is totally my mom. I will not tell her anything about a guy though until it's serious. I just don't want to get her hopes up about anyone.
I would be excited to meet a guy's parents. Hopefully they liked me!0 -
I only ever introduced 2 b/fs to my Mum. They were long term, serious commitments. We spent time together as a family at xmas etc.
So yeah, a 'serious' , long term relationship.
Definitely not 'one and done's'!!!! :laugh:0 -
I have a very close, but casual relationship with my immediate family. Introducing them to someone is no biggie whatsoever for me. My dad is the coolest ever, my sister is my best friend and my mom is so crazy people don't believe me about her until they meet and then it's a fun inside joke.
On the other hand, me meeting someone else's parents turns me into a bundle of anxiety. I don't like even meeting friends parents because it makes me so uncomfortable. Siblings are much easier.0 -
I would have to be in a serious relationship or very close to it to introduce anyone to my family. In fact, my nieces and nephews have never seen me with anyone. It would probably be weird for them. I brought guys home as a teen when I wasn't serious about anyone, but that's all different now.
I would likely be very nervous meeting someone else's parents out of fear that I would say something stupid and live up to the dumb blonde stereotype!!0 -
I have strict traditional Asian parents straight from the motherland and they'd love for me to marry a nice Hmong man. I wouldn't introduce a guy to them unless he and I were very serious. Just don't want to bother with the hassle of lectures and looks of disappointment each time I date someone. I was with my ex for 4.5 years and didn't even introduce him to the folks until almost year 3. They're a lot more lenient these days though as I think they've given up on me finding a Hmong guy.
Now with this whole facebook thing and everyone and their mothers being on there.....if you're dating someone and they're on your friend list and their folks are on their list...ignore them or introduce yourself electronically?
I think the whole introduce yourself is a very sweet idea
specially when distance plays such a great part. 0 -
Yeah, this is the same for me.I have a very close, but casual relationship with my immediate family. Introducing them to someone is no biggie whatsoever for me.
I rarely had to introduce anyone to my parents, as I left home for a student room fairly early. I've introduced only girls I've been with for at least a few months, and when I was forced to do so as I was using my parent's flat with the girl (back when they still lived there).
As for the other person's parents, I go along just fine with most people so it's just a case of finding a few common interests with them specifically. I normally go along just fine with the parents if I go along with the girl.
I never introduced myself to anyone electronically, and I don't particularly like or care about Facebook. I don't change my relationship status on Facebook either, I disclose as little of my life as possible on these kind of websites as I'd prefer to be in control of my public image.0 -
I haven't introduced any of my guys to my family. It was way too soon. I'd introduce once I knew we were pretty serious and dating for at least 6 months.
Guys seem to be different. A lot of them want me to meet mom right away.0 -
I'm not usually worried about meeting SO's parents, but am a little concerned about the latest ones haha.
I'm not to phased and pretty casual about introducing my girlfriend to my parents, they are cool as, never any drama. They are happy as long as I'm happy and I don't think everyone meeting is such a big deal like most people say it is.
Why is it such a big issue for everyone?0 -
If I introduce a guy to my parents, I really like him. Unless it happens just by circumstance...
Meeting his parents? depends on how he treats the issue... if it's a big deal to him, I'll probably be nervous...if it's not, I'll just be at ease, go with the flow, no biggie....0 -
I disclose as little of my life as possible on these kind of websites as I'd prefer to be in control of my public image.
Good call Flo, I am the same :flowerforyou:0 -
Now with this whole facebook thing and everyone and their mothers being on there.....if you're dating someone and they're on your friend list and their folks are on their list...ignore them or introduce yourself electronically?
Thankfully I don't have this problem. I tried to get my mother to do the online thing but she hates it. Says looking at the monitor for more than 1 minute gives her a headache. She doesn't have any problems watching her telenovelas (Spanish language soap operas) on a 47 inch flat screen though! She has tons of DVR things she could watch all day. My father is a little more adventurous. I gave him my old laptop to play with and he's all over the darn internet. Virus here, trojan there almost every damn week! :laugh: However he sticks mostly to the news and sports. He knows about Facebook but never expressed interest in seeing what it's all about.Guys seem to be different. A lot of them want me to meet mom right away.
It's because you're awesome.
As for me. I think over 6 months if things are going smoothly I'd want her to meet them. My parents are pretty chill. It's my extended family, aunts, uncles, cousins that are bad. They start asking about marriage plans, how many kids, etc etc. :noway:0 -
Not really a big deal to me. My mom's pretty cool, I hang out with her like a friend and she doesn't nag me about getting married or having kids. That and she gets along with pretty much everybody. She is already facebook friends with my girlfriend. I haven't met her parents yet though, but her mom said she wants to meet me.0
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For me it's somewhat of a big deal because it means I'm serious about the guy and the relationship. My parents are pretty cool about this kind of thing, but I'm still careful to not make any introductions too soon. Also, since I've only introduced a few guys to my parents, just getting there is a bigger deal.
That being said, the guy I'm currently dating ended up meeting my dad WAY earlier than I'd have hoped for. Long story short, my dad stopped by my place unannounced, thinking he'd be really awesome and come swap out the tires on my car... only to find someone else's car in my driveway. Since I had to get the boy to move his car in order to access mine... introductions were necessary and unavoidable. Was it too soon in my opinion... definitely. Did it work out... yes it did!
As for my meeting parents. I'm a bit weirded out if a guy wants me to meet his parents too soon. I'd prefer waiting at least 3 months before such introductions are made. But sometimes things happen.0 -
I have strict traditional Asian parents straight from the motherland and they'd love for me to marry a nice Hmong man. I wouldn't introduce a guy to them unless he and I were very serious. Just don't want to bother with the hassle of lectures and looks of disappointment each time I date someone. I was with my ex for 4.5 years and didn't even introduce him to the folks until almost year 3. They're a lot more lenient these days though as I think they've given up on me finding a Hmong guy.
Now with this whole facebook thing and everyone and their mothers being on there.....if you're dating someone and they're on your friend list and their folks are on their list...ignore them or introduce yourself electronically?
Interesting. I know many Asian women and not a single one of them had parents that pushed them to date an Asian man. In fact, I've experienced the exact opposite.
As crazy as it sounds, I've heard Asian moms say that they would prefer their daughters to ONLY date white men and that it was a sign of "good parenting" that their Asian daughter ended up with a white guy. Granted, these were definitely the "tiger mom" type of mothers.0 -
Hmmm if I could help it no one on earth would ever meet my mother. (she has issues and I dont talk to her)
Neither of my parents kive down here, So I guess if I was dating someone it would be would my Daddy came for a visit. But the whole introducing the guy to the family thing for me means my guy friends and my kids . With my guys I would introduce them soon cause if my boys dont like em I need to delve a little closer. With my kids though I would have to be pretty serious about the guy to introduce him to the kids as anything other then my friend.. Meeting a So parents is no biggie for me as parents love me lol0 -
Guys seem to be different. A lot of them want me to meet mom right away.
It's because you're awesome.
Yup!! 10 points for you!!
I figured it was the culture difference. I mean, my dad would still want my guy to ask for my hand in marriage.0 -
I haven't introduced any of my guys to my family. It was way too soon. I'd introduce once I knew we were pretty serious and dating for at least 6 months.
Guys seem to be different. A lot of them want me to meet mom right away.
They wanna check out the genes. "How long is she gonna stay hot for?" mentality. Haha0 -
Meeting my parents means a flight and then staying in their home, so it would be a huge deal. My parents have met two of my former exes (including the one I married). I never had a boyfriend while I lived with them, although they did meet my various school dance or prom dates who picked me up, but that was nothing serious.
It's only recently that I've actually told my mother about dating new men. I used to not say anything until I was in a relationship, but now that I moved really far away from family, I know she worries that I'm lonely, so when she hears I'm out with friends or I have a date, I think she worries less about me sitting around at home all by lonesome myself.0 -
I asked the question on the way to my high school football game (where Beardburn works) because I found out that his dad and stepmom were coming to meet me this weekend and taking us out to dinner.
I felt awkward, as in "were not even exclusive yet, why on earth am I meeting your parents?" I didn't say anything to him, just went along with it.0 -
I hold off for a little bit but my SO asked me if I wanted to meet his dad pretty early on. I just took it as a good sign that I meant quite a bit to him. Now he has invited me back to Minnesota to meet his mom and sister and I am excited. He is going to meet my dad in October. I think they are good signs and I think we are both excited about showing each other off to our families.
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Funny you posted this. My girlfriend asked me this weekend if I'd like to meet her mother in 2 weeks. Both of our families live about 3 hours away (in opposite directions) and her mother is coming for a visit the first weekend of October. We've been dating for 2 months now and when I write it out, it might sound a little too soon, but the timing works out. Apparently I'm the first boyfriend to meet the family so thats a bit scary, but I feel really comfortable with this girl so I'm actually pretty excited about it. Anyone with advice to help make a good impression, I'm all ears.
My parents on the other hand aren't even aware that I'm dating. In the past they've gotten overly attached to my girlfriends and my sisters boyfriends so I'm trying to put that off as long as possible. Plus my mom is very gossipy and I'm a very private person, so I don't want everyone knowing my business. It's a huge step for me to introduce a girl to my parents at this point.0 -
My boyfriend and I are exclusive and been dating a month. However, over the weekend his sister was doing a family dinner and "we" were invited. I had met one niece before and both parents are already gone. It was great, no problems and he is eager to meet my family, which will happen in the next few weeks---probably meeting my sister and brother in law this weekend and the rest of family throughout October as we have a few birthday celebrations coming up.0
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It would have to be very very serious .. like over a year serious .. lol. My family and I are so close that to bring just anyone into the mix .. nope.0
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