Anyone have a child with an Autism Spectrum diagnosis?
kathim429
Posts: 379 Member
I have a son who is 9. He falls somewhere on the Autism Spectrum. Probably leaning toward a high functioning Aspberger's or Pervasive Personality Disorder. Of course there is a 1 year waiting list for a Behavioral Pediatrician.
He spends the majority of his day in an Emotional Support class. He is in 4th grade. He does spend some of his day in a 'regular' class room. He has told me today that "all' (not convinced it is all) of the kids in his 'regular' classroom tell him he is ARTISTIC (and he said they don't mean this as a compliment). I asked him if they meant autistic, and he said yes.
The story went on and on. If there is anyone out there that has any experience with this, I would love to get any feedback. What do you do when your child realizes that they are different. And if your child already has emotional issues and just wants to fit in, how do you explain that sometimes people are just mean?
My heart breaks for him right now, he is struggling.
He spends the majority of his day in an Emotional Support class. He is in 4th grade. He does spend some of his day in a 'regular' class room. He has told me today that "all' (not convinced it is all) of the kids in his 'regular' classroom tell him he is ARTISTIC (and he said they don't mean this as a compliment). I asked him if they meant autistic, and he said yes.
The story went on and on. If there is anyone out there that has any experience with this, I would love to get any feedback. What do you do when your child realizes that they are different. And if your child already has emotional issues and just wants to fit in, how do you explain that sometimes people are just mean?
My heart breaks for him right now, he is struggling.
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My son is not diagnosed autistic. He may not be autistic at all. His half-brother (his dads other son) is moderately autistic. My son is 6 years old, has been kicked out of two pre-k's, suspended from kindergarten several times, and this year has been suspended a couple times from After School. He sees a pediatric psychiatrist and is medicated for adhd and anxiety - but honestly is biggest issue is the anxiety. He had a problem with a motor tic (eye blinking) which medication has controlled. When he had an EEG done (before medication) - it showed partial focal seizures in the left rear temporal lobe. An MRI (after medication) shows no activity. Ages 3-4 were tough. After medication, he became GREAT at home, but struggled at school in a large classroom. He is now in a self contained classroom where there is a teacher/student ration of 2:6. He has JUST started going into a regular classroom during a part of the day in the hopes that he may be able to transition back to mainstream classes at his regular school (he has to go to the school where the program is at now). As a young child he played beside others, never with them. Would handle anxiety by responded aggressively. Was more focused on how a toy worked as opposed to playing with the toy. These characteristics have diminished somewhat as he's gotten older.
Point is - he may or may not be considered autistic. Who knows. But he is special, and he is different. Rather than see that as something to be sad about - I actually embrace it and and explain to him why he's so special and how it does and will continue to benefit him. There are a lot of very very successful accomplished people who have aspbergers. I would pull up stories on each of them and share them with him. I would reinforce over and over and over again that autism is not a bad thing (especially when high functioning). Also - it may be a good opportunity to help teach him how words hurt people - especially since autistic children typically have trouble empathizing. From there - I would get him involved with something (and as many things as possible) that would improve his confidence - whether it be martial arts, sports, etc. Especially if some of the kids in his class do these same activities. Hope that helps :-)0 -
One final note.... I know it's tough. I handle mine obviously as a single parent as well - and at times it feels so UNFAIR. I have my son almost 100% of the time. I had to leave his father because he was verbally and physically abusive. Personality disorders run rampant on his side of the family - on my side there are hardly ANY. At times I've felt like I've had to pay the price for his screwy DNA. I think it's going to be as crucial for you as it is for your son to focus on all the postive things that come from having a child who is autistic. Perspecitve will affect everything.0
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Thank you so much for your response. I know what you mean about letting them know they are special. I do that with him, and point out all of the things that he is great at. I get very frustrated because it really feels as though the school does not necessarily set him up to succeed. He has an IEP in place and I swear there are times they truly ignore it and those are the days where he really acts out. He has major transition issues. We work on them and his reaction constantly.
I do not let him see my frustration or how badly I feel sometimes when he struggles. I have no one in my family that understands the situation. They all think that they can 'fix' him. He doesn't need to be fixed. He is great the way he is. It is comforting to know there are people in the same situation and to see or hear how they handle things.0 -
Hi, I haven't been in this group for a few months, so I'm a little late to this party...
BUT...
My son is not diagnosed but has autistic tendencies. My best friend, who has Aspergers, writes a really great blog that is helpful for both parents and higher functioning autistics who may not understand certain things until explained by a fellow autie.
Her blog is: http://savedaspie.blogspot.com/
My friend Stan runs this page: http://www.scn.org/autistics/
Both are primarily geared toward helping auties understand the world around them and not feel so alone, but I think the insights are helpful for parents as well to understand how their kid perceives things
Edit to add: I've written a few guest blogs on her site, but here are some of my favorite post by her:
http://savedaspie.blogspot.com/2011/02/had-adult-breakdown-todaybut-recovered.html
http://savedaspie.blogspot.com/2011/03/yoga-makes-me-cry.html0 -
My 9 year old has not been diagnosed, but has been evaluated 2 times in his life. He is very "Aspergers-ey" behaviorally and socially.
School life has been a constant struggle since kindergarten. It is really hard dealing with this as a full-time, working, single parent.
The one thing that keeps me mentally healthy is exercise and getting healthy. Thank heavens for MFP!
Feel free to add me as a friend!0
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