Not sure if I like him 'in that way' or not
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SunKissed1989
Posts: 1,314 Member
About 2 months ago, I moved to start my postgrad degree and I got a transfer to another branch of the store I worked at back at home.
There's a guy who works on the same department as me and we work the same shifts (Thursday nights and Sundays, with the exception of a couple of hours on Sundays). Before we met (he was on holiday for my first couple of shifts at this branch) people at work had told me I would really like him, he's a really nice guy and so on...so I was thinking like ok, he'll be someone I get on with and work with and that's it, but when I did meet him, I immediately understood what people meant when they said he was a really nice guy because, well, he is.
He's so outgoing, confident, we get along like a house on fire and it's like our personalities match to the finest detail. Like, even my little 'eccentricities' aren't weird to him (he even shares some of them) and we just laugh away - we even have our 'inside jokes' and such.
I really like him, but I think I might like him 'in that way' as well, but I'm not sure. I really look forward to seeing him at work and I light up a little inside when he comes in and says hi and uses the nickname we came up with together. A couple of weeks ago, I got a slight telling off by one of the managers, nothing major, but it still made me feel a bit upset and when they left, he made a wee joke and I just smiled and giggled and it cheered me up straight away - he just makes me smile.
Do I have a crush on this guy? I don't know if I want to act on it or not because I don't even know if it's a 'proper' crush or if I'm just attracted to his personality. He's not the hottest guy on the planet but he is an alright looking guy.
Another thing I'm worried about is whether or not the 'chemistry' between us is unique or if he's like that with everyone else so I don't know if I'm reading too much into it and whether or not we have a good chemistry as friends...and of course, there is the risk of making things awkward if acting on whatever this is backfires and we lose what we have as friends...
Should I act on this 'maybe crush' or should I enjoy the 'chemistry' we have and stay friends?
There's a guy who works on the same department as me and we work the same shifts (Thursday nights and Sundays, with the exception of a couple of hours on Sundays). Before we met (he was on holiday for my first couple of shifts at this branch) people at work had told me I would really like him, he's a really nice guy and so on...so I was thinking like ok, he'll be someone I get on with and work with and that's it, but when I did meet him, I immediately understood what people meant when they said he was a really nice guy because, well, he is.
He's so outgoing, confident, we get along like a house on fire and it's like our personalities match to the finest detail. Like, even my little 'eccentricities' aren't weird to him (he even shares some of them) and we just laugh away - we even have our 'inside jokes' and such.
I really like him, but I think I might like him 'in that way' as well, but I'm not sure. I really look forward to seeing him at work and I light up a little inside when he comes in and says hi and uses the nickname we came up with together. A couple of weeks ago, I got a slight telling off by one of the managers, nothing major, but it still made me feel a bit upset and when they left, he made a wee joke and I just smiled and giggled and it cheered me up straight away - he just makes me smile.
Do I have a crush on this guy? I don't know if I want to act on it or not because I don't even know if it's a 'proper' crush or if I'm just attracted to his personality. He's not the hottest guy on the planet but he is an alright looking guy.
Another thing I'm worried about is whether or not the 'chemistry' between us is unique or if he's like that with everyone else so I don't know if I'm reading too much into it and whether or not we have a good chemistry as friends...and of course, there is the risk of making things awkward if acting on whatever this is backfires and we lose what we have as friends...
Should I act on this 'maybe crush' or should I enjoy the 'chemistry' we have and stay friends?
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Replies
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If you want to have sex with him, act on it.
If you don't, enjoy the friendship.0 -
Sounds like he's your "work husband".
It really depends on what you want right now. Do you want a relationship? Do you want some good sex?0 -
Have you ever done anything outside of work like happy hour or anything?0
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I don't want to hop into bed with him or anything but I really like him and would like to get to know him outside of work...like go on a night out or something. We're both going to our work Christmas night out (which is like 1st December - early to avoid the rush closer to Christmas day) but I'm not sure if I should enjoy the friendship for now or consider the idea of 'asking him out' like dating or something.
I never really went through the 'dating' phase with my last 2 (and only 2) boyfriends so I don't know how it goes and how to make the step between being good work friends to maybe being something more...0 -
Sounds like he's your "work husband".
It really depends on what you want right now. Do you want a relationship? Do you want some good sex?
Careful that "work husband" crap can get your hiney in a fire. :noway:
If it seems like he might be your bff....I'd say go for it, with caution....becuase as soon as co-workers know they are going to eat you alive with it. Ignore them and if it works great.
PS you don't have to sleep with him right away just "let" that happen don't force it. If it doesn't enjoy every second of having him around more than at work.0 -
Allow me to rephrase.
Do you want to have sex with him eventually?
As far as what to do, ask him to do something. I realize that you may not have done traditional dating but that doesn't make it some grand mystery.
"Hey, I'm doing some karaoke at the bar with some folks on Tuesday! Do you want to come?"0 -
Allow me to rephrase.
Do you want to have sex with him eventually?
As far as what to do, ask him to do something. I realize that you may not have done traditional dating but that doesn't make it some grand mystery.
"Hey, I'm doing some karaoke at the bar with some folks on Tuesday! Do you want to come?"
Yes.. and then show up looking sexy as hell.0 -
Allow me to rephrase.
Do you want to have sex with him eventually?
As far as what to do, ask him to do something. I realize that you may not have done traditional dating but that doesn't make it some grand mystery.
"Hey, I'm doing some karaoke at the bar with some folks on Tuesday! Do you want to come?"
Yes.. and then show up looking sexy as hell.
I think this is a good idea. It's not like you're asking him on a date, so it is much more tame. If he says no, it won't be a huge deal because you just asked him to hang out, rather than ask him on a date. And if you make that move, he might be more up to saying, "I had fun tonight. Wanna go out just the two of us?"0 -
You could keep it casual and ask him out with some other friends...If there is chemistry, you will eventually connect, even within the group. If not, the friendship is not sabotaged in trying to find out.0
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Thanks guys
I do want to get to know him outside of work so that seems like a good place to start. I know we both like the same club (well, I've only been there once, but really liked it) so I guess I could ask him to join myself and my friends the next time we go out.
I'll admit, I'm quite shy and feel slightly out of my depth when it comes to asking guys out so it might take time for me to get the courage up, but our friendship at work will hopefully make me feel more relaxed and confident about it - fingers crossed 0 -
Ok, I've decided to enjoy the friendship for now - if something happens, then great, but to be perfectly honest, I've got enough things to worry about on my postgrad course than to go chasing after guys.0
