Stronglifts 5x5 for Women

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Men in the weights bit of the gym

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loliblullama
loliblullama Posts: 140 Member
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I just wondered if anyone else deals with this. On Friday I decided to redo my SL W1 D1 because I wasn't happy with my form the first time. I also wanted to redo them because the gym had just put in the weights with the plates & the first day I did SL they weren't there.

Anyway, my partner & I start walking towards them (& it's obvious where we're both going) & this guy just barges in front and goes to the squat rack so I go towards the bench and some other dude just goes there.

Like... I know I'm big & ugly enough to be seen - I don't get why the guys have to act like they own the weights area. Last time we did SL we had to do it in the stretching bit of the gym because the guys were just hogging all the things. It really pees me off. I really struggle with social anxiety and I really pushed myself to join the gym. It wasn't easy but I did it anyway but now I feel too scared to go to the gym.

And when we do weights they just kind of look and scoff like what are these two girls doing in our bit of the gym.

I can't wait until I'm lifting heavier than most of them, it's just so intimidating and I hate it.

Do you guys have that?

Replies

  • ishtar13
    ishtar13 Posts: 528 Member
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    I have never had that experience. There was only one time when I had spent several minutes setting up the cage for my use and one guy didn't realize it and tried to take it.

    I have walked in when other people were using the equipment I wanted and just asked, "are you gonna be awhile?" Then set my stuff down to show I was waiting and went to the cardio area to do a 5-10 min warm up.

    The polite thing is to ask to "work in" (you work on their rests between sets) or ask how many sets they have left. If they realize someone is waiting for the equipment, they usually hurry up or let you work in.
  • djohnson_143
    djohnson_143 Posts: 21 Member
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    I haven't had this experience but I think its great that your just trying! Is it possible to go at a time that the gym is more open. My hubby and I started going in the early morning (I'm not a morning person AT ALL). I love how open it its. We can use whatever we want w/o waiting.

    EIther way though, you shouldn't have to feel like they are hogging it. Just keep it up and you WILL be lifting more than them in not time!
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
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    I'm sorry this was your experience, hopefully next time they will be more considerate.

    If anything, I've found the oppposite. If someone is using the squat rack and I'm waiting for it, they'll practically fall over themselves to offer it to me.
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
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    Also:
    Like... I know I'm big & ugly enough to be seen - I don't get why the guys have to act like they own the weights area.
    Judging by your picture, this doesn't seem to be the case. It makes me sad when people talk about themselves like this. Love the eyelashes BTW.
  • djohnson_143
    djohnson_143 Posts: 21 Member
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    +1 to you are not big and ugly! You are BEAUTIFUL!
  • nexangelus
    nexangelus Posts: 2,080 Member
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    Yes, sadly I have had a few times where I felt completely invisible. Only one time I swore. (well there were two sets of four and five young lads who decided they wanted the squat rack and the bench press as well as all the heavy weights) I got a little bit teed off! Oops! I just hang around the equipment between sets (so no one snaffles it) or just go and do something else for 10 - 15 mins if they won't let me go between sets with them (some do, most don't).
  • tameko2
    tameko2 Posts: 31,634 Member
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    I haven't had issues, but I am pretty assertive. I go straight in to the weight room and straight to the rack and drop my stuff. I do not chat, or walk slowly, or look around. If there are people using them all, I put my stuff down in between them and watch them for a bit, if anyone looks like they are just hanging out in there I'll ask how many sets they have left.

    Generally someone will let me know how many more sets they have. Also you should know that like 75% of people at the gym have no REAL plan when they get there, they just show up and go to whatever looks good to them at the time, so you can usually ask politely how many sets they have left and they'll either know EXACTLY, or they'll be like "uh I dunno, just a little more" and generally the latter will leave after one or two more sets.

    Once people see that you mean business, they will get out of your way.
  • loliblullama
    loliblullama Posts: 140 Member
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    I haven't had issues, but I am pretty assertive...

    Once people see that you mean business, they will get out of your way.

    Honestly, I think this sums it up. My partner & I both have quite severe social anxiety and so we kind of tip toe in - I think it would be better if I were more assertive - I actually found that last time I went and I was more comfortable with what I needed etc I just went in looking like I knew what I was doing I felt it was handled better - it also helped that the gym was less busy that day too. :smile:
    Also:
    QUOTE:
    Like... I know I'm big & ugly enough to be seen - I don't get why the guys have to act like they own the weights area.

    Judging by your picture, this doesn't seem to be the case. It makes me sad when people talk about themselves like this. Love the eyelashes BTW.
    +1 to you are not big and ugly! You are BEAUTIFUL!

    :embarassed: :embarassed: thank you. I don't ever feel that way, but uuh thank you. I do love my lashes too!! They are amazing indeed.
  • darwinforyou
    darwinforyou Posts: 988 Member
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    I also asked the trainer at my gym what the slow times are for the weights - I make a point of going during the super slow times so I don't have to deal with people. Also, if someone is near the rack I'll just ask them if they were using it and so far they have only said no. I get funny looks, cause I seem to be the only girl in that area, I've never seen other girls on their own in the free weights. It is super intimidating but you know what? Screw them you are doing this for YOU and YOU alone. You want to feel good and you're taking the step to do that. Believe in yourself and your goals and that you do belong there - and they're the turds who don't.
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
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    I was thinking about this today, and I have experienced this. When I was a member of Planet Fitness the only barbells available were Smith Machines. I'd be waiting for one to be available and some guy would just walk up and use it ahead of me, I guess assuming I just wanted to watch the guys use it or I was waiting for some cardio machine. I stood up for myself though and told them I was next.

    I go to a better gym now with free weights and it hasn't been the slightest issue. The men have been more than accomodating and polite.

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