Kinky Women
Replies
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A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.0 -
A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.
Can I get an AMEN! oh yes AMEN lol:flowerforyou: :drinker:0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??0
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A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.
I agree that most women want to feel safe and respected but I disagree on whether that will alllow them to be more open. This is true of some women but not all women. I've had some very graphic and specific conversations with both genders about a lot of different aspects of sex. Some women just don't like sex or they see it as necessary to have a man in their life. It's very sad because they are missing out but they do exist.0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
Seriously Im coming to LA...let me know when is good for you....January is shot for me, unless you want to meet me in Vegas next weekend! Feb looks good and March is okay! And I dont need you to be a sugar momma so I met at least one of your dealbreakers.0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Nope! A decade ago I could roll with that perhaps. Now...I want to be taken out for dinner and I will make breakfast in the morning before we hang out for the day!
Yeah...I am probably ruined for one night stands now.0 -
My thoughts for you Bill is that if you are sticking with your 30 day rule is to go for the "free/crazy" girls..you know go to swingers clubs ect and get with girls who don't need the trust and are very in touch with their sexuality with out the need to really know their partner.
Its not a judgement..its just that I think more women are looking to explore in a safe environment ..and you seem to admittedly have player written all over you.
The times I've had casual or a one night stand I for some reason was unable to get across what I needed (not for lack of trying)..and I knew he didn't care so...it was pretty empty on my side. So if he can't even be bothered trying to get me off for the vanilla sex..why bother revealing the other side I want to try out.
edit..lol or go to LA0 -
Cinsuccess and Will...we have a match!0
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I think the women on this board are an anomaly. I'm often amazed by how into sex many of you are! I don't know any women in real life -- myself included -- who are as interested in sex as many of the women who post here.
Haven't met the right ones I guess?
My bf is lucky. I am a very sexual person. I am very into it. I want it all the time.0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
LOL, that's where we differ I guess. I LOVE cuddling XD0 -
My thoughts for you Bill is that if you are sticking with your 30 day rule is to go for the "free/crazy" girls..you know go to swingers clubs ect and get with girls who don't need the trust and are very in touch with their sexuality with out the need to really know their partner.
Its not a judgement..its just that I think more women are looking to explore in a safe environment ..and you seem to admittedly have player written all over you.
The times I've had casual or a one night stand I for some reason was unable to get across what I needed (not for lack of trying)..and I knew he didn't care so...it was pretty empty on my side. So if he can't even be bothered trying to get me off for the vanilla sex..why bother revealing the other side I want to try out.
edit..lol or go to LA
Let me clarify! I do not have a 30 day rule!! If I meet someone who makes the cut I will gladly surpass the 30 day mark. I just havent yet. And I would not classify me as a player solely because I do not seek out one night stands or fwb situations. Maybe I am unclear on what a player is though.
I also think the single greatest and sexiest thing in the world is the female orgasm so no i dont just leave my partner there to fend for herself!!
I was quite well behaved for quite some time but then I blew up last weekend. Of course some of that was the bday party with the motorcycle club...that had bad news written all over it! A great time though!0 -
Of course the minute I step away to teach a class you guys pull up such a fun :bigsmile: topic......
Will it might be girl in your area, my girls down here are very verbal about what we will and won't do. Vanilla is ok:grumble: but it had better be because we're too wore out from everything else. Personally I am a very blunt person and have no problem letting people no what I want. I have boundaries and have no problem telling someone no. I have also compared sex to a UFC match ...its not over till one of us taps out lol0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
LOL, that's where we differ I guess. I LOVE cuddling XD
Might have to turn in my man card for this...but I enjoy cuddling as well.0 -
Seriously Im coming to LA...let me know when is good for you....January is shot for me, unless you want to meet me in Vegas next weekend! Feb looks good and March is okay! And I dont need you to be a sugar momma so I met at least one of your dealbreakers.
Feb is bad, I have to go to Milwaukee on business but March is open. LOL
I also think the single greatest and sexiest thing in the world is the female orgasm so no i dont just leave my partner there to fend for herself!!
I won't go into details on this thread but I've been compared to the energizer bunny in this regard so you actually may be too tired to leave by the time I'm done with you!0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
LOL, that's where we differ I guess. I LOVE cuddling XD
I love to cuddle... just not after sex. When I'm done, I want to be left alone.0 -
not if that's the state of your relationship with her. making her feel safe does not necessarily equate to making her feel like you're in a committed monogamous relationship. it just means that she can be herself and TRUST you not to intentionally hurt her. if you lie and say you want a relationship and then ask her to leave as soon as you're done, that's not helping her trust you. if you are straight with her then no harm done.
as for kink..... i guess it depends how extreme you consider kink. text book stuff? or serious fetish type stuff? some people might consider anything goes with just two people normal, but swinging or group sex is kinky. others might think group sex is norm, but gangbangs or bondage kinky. it's really all relative....
you need to ask the person what THEY consider kinky. maybe they think getting tied up is? and then YOU decide if that is kinky enough for you, or do you need more........ :-)So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??0 -
A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.
I have a dentist appointment so will be out for a bit but as a thought...
I can`t imagine any truly decent guy who does not want a lady willing to be intimate with him to completely enjoy the moment.
It is just natural.
Having said that,a vast majority of ladies I have seen talk about sex also have no reservations of having a sex for its own sake only and then get on with the day event when the desire occurs.
I have no complaints on this but it can be a bit of a confusing message to send too.0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
LOL, that's where we differ I guess. I LOVE cuddling XD
Might have to turn in my man card for this...but I enjoy cuddling as well.
Since when is it not manly to cuddle?0 -
Cuddling is ok ...unless he snores. I'm a light sleeper and if your snoring in my ear I want to put a pillow in your face lol. Most guys I know want to cuddle a little. Personally I've never cared if they stay or go home. Unless the kids are home then you must leave before they get up I don't want to have to ninja a guy out of the house so the kids don't see him0
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Cuddling is ok ...unless he snores. I'm a light sleeper and if your snoring in my ear I want to put a pillow in your face lol. Most guys I know want to cuddle a little. Personally I've never cared if they stay or go home. Unless the kids are home then you must leave before they get up I don't want to have to ninja a guy out of the house so the kids don't see him
I can sleep through anything. I am also prone to talking/walking in my sleep on a fairly regular basis. So if you stay the night you might have fun stories to tell the next morning.0 -
I think you're going through a vanilla patch... sorry. Call up your bathroom twirly from the other night.
I'm the same whether in a relationship or one night stand, however I do open up to more possibilities as the relationship grows.
How YOU doin??
:smokin:0 -
WOW - I learned a LOT in this thread...0
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I have scared off quite a few men on the first date by my knowledge of the "alternative" lifestyle as well as my honesty about some of the toys I have used on men. I wasn't so open when I was younger.... now that I've hit 40, I really don't care what anyone thinks of me so I make sure to discuss sex early. I don't want to waste my time or his if we're not compatible.
What's an 'alternative' lifestyle? :bigsmile:0 -
So leaving or asking her to leave after we are done is NOT the correct answer? I really like to sleep in my own bed though??
Honey, once I'm done with you then you're free to go!
LOL, that's where we differ I guess. I LOVE cuddling XD
Yeah!! Me too!!! Even my FWB wasnt allowed to get up and go! I like sleeping with someone and waking up and doing it again and making brekky..........awesome! :bigsmile:0 -
My ex used to tell me how kinky he was with his gfs when we met but the man wouldn't let me give him oral.
yeah, exactly!! Kinky is very subjective. Especially in this forum when one minute you can read that one would never send a naked pic to a b/f and the next minute you can read that one likes being strangled!!! :laugh:0 -
I think you're going through a vanilla patch... sorry. Call up your bathroom twirly from the other night.
I'm the same whether in a relationship or one night stand, however I do open up to more possibilities as the relationship grows.
How YOU doin??
:smokin:
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A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.
^^^ Absolutely agree with this. I want a freak that knows how to romance the frack out of me.0 -
A smart woman just said to me recently "silly men..if they knew to make us feel safe they could explore so much".
I agree. This is not just a bunch of women who profess high levels of sexuality and then turn vanilla. Guys..I would figure out quick what you are projecting. Does she feel safe or unsafe? Beautiful and desired, or used? Are you moving too fast or slow?
Lots of us women are highly and intensely sexual. But we (not all but many) still want it wrapped up in mystery, flirtation and romance. I want my boundaries pushed significantly...but I also want to feel respected and cared for after..even if it is just a one night stand. Honestly..figure out a way to convince her/us she is the most special and treasured woman you've met and half your job is done.
^^^ Absolutely agree with this. I want a freak that knows how to romance the frack out of me.
I agree with this completely!! I do better when I am comfortable with a man. I would love to wave my freak flag but if I don't feel I can then I will keep it hidden. Plus I would want to keep the relationship spicy!0 -
If I don't feel safe, protected, wanted... he's missing out on a lot. From very recent experience on this one, things start falling off the plate. If I'm not in a good mental place in the relationship, I want to be held, not ****ed. I will not eat, so you're not getting any home cooked meals. My sense of humor goes in the toilet.
If I do feel wanted... well, as my ex once told me: if she looks like a porn star, she ****s like a comatose mattress. if she looks like a casual housewife, she will milk you dry. Trust me... I look nothing like a porn star.0
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