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recee27
Posts: 34
Today I found a video on my phone that one of my daughters made and I was in it. It was from this past summer. I literally cringed at the sight of myself on video. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and I don't see what video's show. I AVOID getting my picture taken as much as possible. I don't like to look at my reflection in a window or a mirror when I'm out in public. I don't want to see what everyone else see's. Because when I look at myself in the mirror at home, I don't see myself as big as I really am. Which seems kind of odd because most people think of themselves bigger than what they really are. But I do FEEL like I'm the size I am. Especially lately when I go to zumba and there are loads of tiny little stick figures there in their tight fitting workout clothes and I'm there in as baggie of a shirt as possible. I know I have rolls, I don't need to show them off in tight clothes. I'm hoping with time and weight loss that these issues won't keep being issues for me. I want to be comfortable with who I am and what I look like. Hopefully getting to a healthy weight will help me become that way. And, being one of those people who can wear tight fitting exercise clothing won't be too bad either! 
Does anyone else feel this way? Am I alone on this? I'm just wondering! Just some personal struggles I will always have to deal with.
Does anyone else feel this way? Am I alone on this? I'm just wondering! Just some personal struggles I will always have to deal with. 0
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You certainly aren't alone! I know exactly what you are going through. At the beginning of 2012, my family decided we were going to have a professional photographer take pictures of our huge family and all the "sub-family" groups the day before Thanksgiving as a gift for our 81-yr-old mom. One of my daughters also decided that she was going to get married 3 days before Christmas. So...I knew for MONTHS that I would be in professional photographs at the end of the year, and I wanted so badly to lose weight so I would look good in the pictures and good for my daughter's wedding. Did I lose any weight? Nope. But still...the days came for the pictures, and I knew I looked bad on those days...because I'm not kidding myself about my weight (none of us are). BUT...when the pictures came back, I was devastated to find that I looked worse in the pictures than I ever thought I would...and I already knew I would look bad!!!
I was so ashamed of myself for not doing something during the year so I would look good on those days...especially the special day of my daughter's wedding. But I know I have to lose the weight for myself and not for an outside reason (like photographs). So, I heard about MFP and joined yesterday. Like you, I am TIRED of feeling uncomfortable in my clothes, in seeing myself in reflections from mirrors and windows, in feeling like a GIANT next to my skinny girlfriend when we are sitting next to each other in the movie theater...the list goes on. But I am determined to do it this time. I've joined this group to hopefully get ideas and support when needed, and I also told my daughter of my plans to lose weight (they say telling others helps motivate you to be accountable and stay on track) and had her take my before pictures (not fun, obviously! haha!!). So....here we go!
Good luck to us!!!
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You aren't alone! When I look at myself in my full length mirror I don't think I'm as big as I am. I strive to wear wear clothes that flatter and/or hide my lumps and bumps and when I look in the mirror I'm standing straight and I look ok. When I see myself in pictures or in reflections and my clothes have shifted and I can see a roll or my posture has slumped which emphasizes my midsection.. it's not pretty. In pictures I usually find someone to hide behind. haha! Or use a little photoshop magic! 0
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I look great in the mirror at home! It's when there's a picture taken of me in a group of friends or with my kids, husband, etc. that I actually "see" that I don't look as great as I thought. Then I start with the mind games of "How could you think that you looked good when you don't?" It's frustrating0
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I am with you. I really dislike having my picture taken, and especially video, especially when I haven't "prepared" for it-hair done, clothes that I think make me look good. I have been working not worrying about it so much because as I look back through pictures of my kids I realize there aren't very many with me in them. I heard something somebody said that really struck me along the lines of-if you were to die, the pictures may be the only memory your kids might have of you (my kids are all pretty young so that would be true). It wasn't something that was directed at me but it really hit home that even though I don't like the way I look my kids and family still love me and I should be part of those memories too. I still don't love having my picture taken, but I try to do it more now.0
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I know this thread is a couple of weeks old, but my friend posted this article on facebook tonight and I thought it expressed what I was trying to say really well:
http://myfriendteresablog.com/so-youre-feeling-too-fat-to-be-photographed/0
