IF you dont need anything or dont want anyone to get anything, why dont you call it something different, like some type of gathering??? I have had the same struggle. We are expecting our second, but we gave all my daughters stuff away since she is 7 and we didnt think we could have anymore....But I feel funny asking people to get us stuff when this is the second go around....

I think the freezer meal thing is an awesome idea!!! It would be so helpful to y'all and wouldn't require anyone to feel the need to spend a bunch of money

IF you dont need anything or dont want anyone to get anything, why dont you call it something different, like some type of gathering??? I have had the same struggle. We are expecting our second, but we gave all my daughters stuff away since she is 7 and we didnt think we could have anymore....But I feel funny asking people to get us stuff when this is the second go around....

^This. If you really don't need stuff, then tell your friend that your are uncomfortable with the idea of a shower. If people feel inclined to buy you gifts, then they will buy you gifts, and you can't tell them not to (asking them not to is technically improper because it says that you assume that they are going to).

That said, I have heard of people having a "sprinkle" for a second or third child when the next youngest child isn't that old. I have also heard of people having a full-blown shower for another baby when their next youngest is not really little anymore (especially when, as mentioned, no more children were expected).

Baby stuff is only good for so long with recalls left and right, plus there is always something newer and better coming out. Car seats have expiration dates (a good thing to follow, since they have a lot of plastic, which weakens after being in extreme temperatures and sunlight for so long), so I recommend getting new car seats since your youngest is already four. Since you have other kids, you know from experience what you need/don't need, and it sounds like you can handle getting the things you need.

My opinion is to let people buy if they are going to do so (if they ask what you need, you should insist that you have it handled and only reveal if they press you on it), but if you are otherwise uncomfortable with a party where you are "asking" for presents, then you need to make that known to your friend. If she's really your friend, she shouldn't want to make you uncomfortable for her own gratification, and hopefully she'll still want to organize another type of fun gathering!

I think it would be nice to let your friend help you celebrate, but perhaps in lieu of gifts, you could request donations to a charity of your choice in your baby's name or non-perishable food items that your whole family can use.

Edit: didn't see the frozen meals idea. LOVE this idea!

Another ditto on the frozen meal idea. What we do for the women in our neighborhood is everyone that wants to come gets assigned an ingriedent or two (2 cans cream of mushroom soup or a 2 pound bag of cheese, etc...) and then we make 10 or so frozen meals that she can just pop in the oven. It's fun cooking with a big group of ladies.

We call it a "Sprinkle" instead of a shower and we usually do treats covered in pink or blue sprinkles for everyone to munch on while they cook. Good luck!

My husband's family is large and loves throwing baby-showers. That being said, most gifts are small, well meaning gift. My sister-in-law had a diaper shower for her second, where if you were inclined to give a gift, a small package of diapers was all that was needed.

I threw her a shower for her third, since her mother passed away six months earlier and everyone needed something fun to gather around. I told all the family it was well-wishes only, just play some games, drink some wine and eat some food. Everyone had a blast. And yes, some folks brought gifts.

just saw an adorable idea on pinterest....

asking your guests to being a baby book instead of a card
http://pinterest.com/pin/262334747015240592/

I had the same issue. I am pregnant with baby number 4 and decided to just switch it up a bit. Instead of a baby shower, I am having a pre birthday party exactly 1 month before her due date. Going to have cake and ice cream like a regular party. Snacks will all be baby related. Guest do not need to bring gifts if they want to. The only thing I requested was for them to bring something baby related that was white. Why? I've decided to have a tie dye activity going on during the celebration.

All of the women in my family have always had baby showers for every child (my mother had 4 kids and I remember going to all of my siblings' baby showers!)....my family likes to celebrate everything....or it could be a southern thing, but most people I know also have multiple showers....I think subsequent showers were mostly family and close friends or people at church that don't mind giving gifts every time and really want to. I have heard of women on their 2nd, 3rd, or 4th pregnancies requesting gift cards and clothes instead of registering. Or you could always register only for items that you don't have already.

If you do feel uncomfortable having another shower, I agree with the others that the frozen meal idea is great! That will save you so much time and stress....and you can call it a celebration of the baby's arrival....

I love the book instead of card idea!! My aunt recently did that at her shower and I decided to do the same thing.....Cards cost up to $5 anyway...and people can write a message inside the book....I am not the kind of person that saves cards forever but books are something meaningful that I would use with future children and then save for grandchildren.