I have always had fears. I have never had a miscarriage but I got bad news with my first born that she had a brain tumor during our routine 20 week. ACtually today I got news that I was not expecting. I went in for a routine doc appt at 18w 3d and my doc couldn't find the hb. She looked for what it seemed like an eternity. I saw the look on her face (my doc with both my kids so I have gotten to know her well) and I started crying. Her look told me all. Went in for an emergency ultraound. It took them 2 hours to get us in. The tech said oh there is the baby with the hb. I started crying on the spot. So did my husband. We were expecting the worst news. Then she moved the wand and said oh......You are having twins and there is the other hb. She said she has never found twins this late in a pregnancy. I am freaking out a bit. I have two kids and had trouble trying to decide if we really wanted one more or not. Our first is very easy and so sweet. Or 2nd keeps us on our toes. NOt to mention he has some very bad asthma and health issues. He takes up most of my time. I have no idea how we are going to do two babies a 4 yr and a 2 yr old. Shock is still hitting me and happiness has yet to take place. I am sure I will experience it soon enough. But, right now I am freaking out. Now I am worried about the routine 20 weeker that the babies aren't developing right. Oh the emotions.

There is a scene in the movie "Nine Months" that always pops in my head close to the U/S's. I hear Hugh Grant asking about a third eye or cauliflower ears.... I worry about everything.. I had an u/s at 10 weeks after some problems and was shocked to see him waving around in there. I expected the worst.. They found fibroids and a standing pool of blood. At 18 weeks, I'd had enough of the doctor telling me things were "In limbo" and paid a commercial service to do an U/S. There he was snuggled up and adorable, but they cannot tell you anything medically. She saved a picture labeled "Foot" and I keep seeing 5 bones in a circle and not toes... I'm sure he just moved.. maybe... but my next one is next week with medical staff. I'm hoping for all good news but have been dreaming about cauliflower ears, kidney disorders, heart defects, and that third eye...

U/S this morning... No cauliflower ears.. 2 perfect feet, except they are already the size of a newborns! (I'm only 22 weeks tomorrow.) Long arms. Heart, brains, diaphragm, stomach, kidneys, and gallbladder all present along with some major attitude!!!! He did not like the shaking, poking, and nudging one bit. After stepping on the scale at the dr's office, I have dropped 5lbs, but he is right on track coming in at 1lb.

I was in there for an hour and twenty minutes while she fought to get all the views she needed. Afterwards I was really sore. By Tuesday afternoon I could tell something else was wrong. By 3:30, I was having contractions. They called in medicine for a UTI and had me drink tons of water. I ended up in the hospital yesterday with contractions every 3 minutes. They gave me a shot to stop them for a couple hours. They were back by the afternoon and finally I think we are much better this morning. Only a couple here and there, I certainly feel loads better.