At the End of My Mental Rope
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CellarDoor3824
Posts: 4 Member
Hi everyone. My name is Jess. I am 23 years old. I have struggled with food all of my life, ever since I was five years old. When I was a sophomore in college, I lost over 40 pounds, and dropped another 10-15, but have gained a out ten due to a terrifying and serious problem. A little while ago (November, 2012), my periods stopped for two months due mainly to stress. More recent (Christmas up until yesterday, I've been showing the signs of severe anxiety, depression, and PMDD ( pre menstrual dysphoric disorder). I have been binge eating (SERIOUSLY), and I'm scared because it is getting more and more frequent and serious. I'm in a stressful living situation and I'm looking for a job. I'm also now journaling daily and seeing a therapists and psychiatrist.
This is not a matter of simple self control. I cannot stress that enough. For anyone who struggles with BED,you know that binges occur as emotional triggers. I personally have trance-like episodes where I cannot control my movements and what my body is doing. When BED is combined with the severe anxiety over food and the exhaustion and lack of motivation of depression, this is nearly unbearable. Also, PMDD plagues sufferers for 15 days of the month! Just when they are at their highest and most enthused about life, weight gain creeps on. Then the mood changes. Then the crying spells. Then the infrequent binges. Then the exhaustion. Then the crying spells and panic attacks. Then the thoughts of hopelessness. Every time is different, yet incredibly crippling.
I can only express this to friends, family and doctors so much. Then, they just don't want to hear it anymore. I have tried to be proactive. I went to my doctor, tried to monitor food and increase exercise, seen a therapist and psychiatrist, and started a journal. I e read about BED and no one will believe that the disorder exists in me. I know how I feel, though, and I am terrified and frustrated. I had such drive. I graduated college and entered grad school with an open mind. I really don't know what to do.
Please help me.
This is not a matter of simple self control. I cannot stress that enough. For anyone who struggles with BED,you know that binges occur as emotional triggers. I personally have trance-like episodes where I cannot control my movements and what my body is doing. When BED is combined with the severe anxiety over food and the exhaustion and lack of motivation of depression, this is nearly unbearable. Also, PMDD plagues sufferers for 15 days of the month! Just when they are at their highest and most enthused about life, weight gain creeps on. Then the mood changes. Then the crying spells. Then the infrequent binges. Then the exhaustion. Then the crying spells and panic attacks. Then the thoughts of hopelessness. Every time is different, yet incredibly crippling.
I can only express this to friends, family and doctors so much. Then, they just don't want to hear it anymore. I have tried to be proactive. I went to my doctor, tried to monitor food and increase exercise, seen a therapist and psychiatrist, and started a journal. I e read about BED and no one will believe that the disorder exists in me. I know how I feel, though, and I am terrified and frustrated. I had such drive. I graduated college and entered grad school with an open mind. I really don't know what to do.
Please help me.
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Replies
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Im so sorry to hear your having a rough time. I am very similar to you. wen its dark its very very dark. maybe you need to see a different doctor if you feel your not being heard. andi depressants do help me too.
add me as a friend if you like. even f its just to vent.0
