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celewis2011
celewis2011 Posts: 243 Member
in Social Groups
okay , so I am on this dating site and I never get emails. I email women and say hi all the time never get a reply back. Either it's because I am ugly or I am saying something wrong in my profile. Just don't understand it.

Replies

  • Fancyface1972
    Fancyface1972 Posts: 19 Member
    I've tried all kinds of date sites and believe me, it usually has nothing to do with how you look. I think that sometimes people there are just trying to see how much attention they can get for themselves. I stop being the one to initiate a conversation on date sites. If I look at the profile and then they decide to look at mine, but not so much as like a photo, flirt, etc. then they just wanted to see what I looked like. Most often they never actually "read" the profile anyway. You also have to be careful because I've ran into a lot of scammers. The ones that showed the most interest were the ones with some sexual desire or money despair. No one was looking for a serious relationship which is what I desire. I hate when that happens. It's a grave disappointment, especially for those sites you have to pay just to see a message if you get any.
  • DiamondRidge
    DiamondRidge Posts: 62 Member
    FWIW - I met my fiance on a dating site. A free one, at that.
  • jmwolffyy
    jmwolffyy Posts: 212 Member
    FWIW - I met my fiance on a dating site. A free one, at that.

    Ditto. I've found the profile to be the place to put out some of your great qualities AND some of your flaws because then you are much more real to the person reading it. It's typical to put only the good stuff but then everyone else has done that too, and there is rarely something that makes you stand out. I have always put info that includes some of how crazy my life is, and that tends to attract the persons who not only see you as real, but the ones who are willing to accept those flaws right from the start.
  • Fancyface1972
    Fancyface1972 Posts: 19 Member
    FWIW - I met my fiance on a dating site. A free one, at that.

    Ditto. I've found the profile to be the place to put out some of your great qualities AND some of your flaws because then you are much more real to the person reading it. It's typical to put only the good stuff but then everyone else has done that too, and there is rarely something that makes you stand out. I have always put info that includes some of how crazy my life is, and that tends to attract the persons who not only see you as real, but the ones who are willing to accept those flaws right from the start.

    So, just what site did you use, if it's okay to share here? I'm sure there are some genuine people out there. You just shared proof of that. I have met some nice friends on date sites, but just no one for a relationship. I've also had some bad experiences, but not to knock date sites because I actually rely on them as far as meeting people.
  • jmwolffyy
    jmwolffyy Posts: 212 Member
    I am not telling you as an advertisement so I would guess it's okay to share the name of the site. LOL. It's OKCupid. It didn't seem a lot different than most of the others except there are quite a few people using it. I was kind of impressed at how many were listed in my local area because I had never found another site with so many locals. I live in kind of a repressed, conservative area, and was really starting to think that I was the only LGBTQ person at all nearby.

    I actually met an ex online too, but that was many years ago when the best "dating" site was Yahoo Personals. Seriously! LOL!
  • Jarice12
    Jarice12 Posts: 135 Member
    I have had problems in the past with dating sites and just dating in general. There are NO gay or lesbian establishments in my area, so no chance there. I "look" straight so I was almost never approached by anyone. My profiles, I felt, were honest but rarely attracted anyone. I don't think its about looks either so maybe its what jmwolfyy said. I did eventually meet my girlfriend and the love of my life on a site called downelink though.
  • DiamondRidge
    DiamondRidge Posts: 62 Member
    okcupid here too. Though we tell people we met on christianmingle.com - just to get a reaction :)
  • Fancyface1972
    Fancyface1972 Posts: 19 Member
    I am not telling you as an advertisement so I would guess it's okay to share the name of the site. LOL. It's OKCupid. It didn't seem a lot different than most of the others except there are quite a few people using it. I was kind of impressed at how many were listed in my local area because I had never found another site with so many locals. I live in kind of a repressed, conservative area, and was really starting to think that I was the only LGBTQ person at all nearby.

    I actually met an ex online too, but that was many years ago when the best "dating" site was Yahoo Personals. Seriously! LOL!

    You made a great point. I recently disabled my account with OkCupid. I did notice that there wasn't many in my area. However, I did have a few conversations on the site with some members, but they mostly were in other states or distant areas. I met one person face to face, but we both had different interests. While we found each other to be nice individuals, there was no potential beyond a friendship. Perhaps the lack of locals in my area is the reason I might have trouble with date sites. I do agree that OkCupid was the best one I tried because I actually tried it twice. It is 100% free as they said. Thanks for the insight, jmwolffyy.
  • jmwolffyy
    jmwolffyy Posts: 212 Member
    okcupid here too. Though we tell people we met on christianmingle.com - just to get a reaction :)

    <3 this!!! Sounds like it could be a lot of fun! :)
  • DiamondRidge
    DiamondRidge Posts: 62 Member
    okcupid here too. Though we tell people we met on christianmingle.com - just to get a reaction :)

    <3 this!!! Sounds like it could be a lot of fun! :)

    Yes! Way too much fun, sometimes! We got my aunt good at Christmas :)
  • LJSmith1989
    LJSmith1989 Posts: 650
    okcupid here too. Though we tell people we met on christianmingle.com - just to get a reaction :)

    Haha! Very good idea!
  • bbbgamer
    bbbgamer Posts: 582 Member
    :laugh:
  • tokataro
    tokataro Posts: 52 Member
    I, too, met my fiance on okcupid. Maybe some people are scared off because you have kids? IDK.
  • SailorSarah311
    SailorSarah311 Posts: 172 Member
    I find that if you make a message a bit more personal then that person will take the time to send something back. Ask specific questions, or comment on something in their profile. One thing that gets me is the "how's your day been" message. I don't think we are getting to know each other if you ask the same question every time. Some people are just too shy to say anything online. Maybe they are unsure of what to say.
  • DiamondRidge
    DiamondRidge Posts: 62 Member
    Dating sites are tricky. I know that I often wouldn't respond to the "how's your day" or "hey, you're cute"... But when my sweetheart sent me a "you look like a fascinating woman" message, I had to check out her profile... And she had on a Veritek jersey in her pics... So I responded. The rest, as they say, is history.
  • SirDavieWallace96
    SirDavieWallace96 Posts: 2
    Love, "You have to love yourself, before you can love another." Maybe it's because that one special person hasn't seen you yet. Why would you be interested in a person who doesn't love you for who you are? Waiting for love is hard darling, but it's worth the wait once you find it.

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