It's breaking my heart...

Okapi42
Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
This is going to be a lengthy post, so here's the TL;DR version first:

There's some kind of abuse going on with the horse I loan; his owner (who has ridden only a handful of times in the last few years) had him out this weekend and I've basically had to start over with the training. He was completely panicked about everything today and needed constant reassurance for the tiniest things.

I need help finding a way to rescue him. I also need to vent. So thanks for listening.
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Replies

  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    I've just come back from a terrible evening with the horse.

    "The" horse, not "my" horse, because sadly, he belongs to somebody else. Somebody I need to get him away from, because I believe that horse is being abused.

    As some of you might know, I've been riding Jackson for a while, on loan, and have had plenty of problems with him. He was aggressive, spooked at everything, and wouldn't listen to me from the saddle or on the ground. Fortunately, I've been making good progress lately. He's gaining confidence and learning quickly, and so am I.

    I went up to ride after work today. Hadn't been since Friday. But the owner and his son rode him during the weekend, so he should have been fine.

    Should have been. The owner decided to take him to a jumping tournament. Neither he nor the horse has practiced jumping since summer last year. The owner is proud that he's never taken a riding lesson in his life, and his horsemanship in general leaves much to be desired, to put it mildly.

    Today I found a totally traumatised horse. He was worse than ever before - wouldn't stand when tied, tried to walk right over the top of me, and spooked and tried to bolt even while I was leading him. He was completely tense and wouldn't drop his head for anything.

    There was no way I could ride, so I managed to get him over to the paddock - took 15 minutes for a 20-second walk - and ended up doing a sort of modified join-up, letting him run around me in circles until he'd calmed down. Then I spent a good 5 minutes just scratching him all over, while he stood there trembling.

    We've been working on clicker training, so I decided to go back to the very basics that he knows perfectly, to reassure him - he'd know what was expected of him and be sure of how to earn a reward.

    So I got out his target cones - I have him trained to touch a cone with his nose if I point at it. Instead, he tried to bully me into feeding him by threatening me. So I stood on the other side of the fence and refused to give in until he went and found the cones. He kept returning to me at the fence for his treats, and finally settled down and worked properly.

    Then I made the mistake of leaving him in the paddock while I went to the barn for more carrots. He ran up and down the fence the entire time, calling, and when I came back, he wouldn't leave me for anything, not even a carrot. I kept pointing at his cones and he'd take a couple of steps toward them, then turn back and come back to me with his head down, licking his lips, asking for permission to stay.

    I eventually had to go in and walk up to the cones with him - he'd keep checking to make sure that I was still beside him. I felt really, really bad leaving him in the stable at the end.

    It's obvious to me that Jackson is far too sensitive to stay with his bully of an owner, and it's breaking my heart. I want to buy him, but from what I've been told, they'll never sell. And now he wants to do this jumping thing every Saturday. Any ideas?
  • BandForAlyAnne
    BandForAlyAnne Posts: 321 Member
    My only idea is to offer to buy him at an sky high price. Make an offer they can't refuse. But you may or may not be able to do that. Whether it's about money or just the idea that you have to do it in the first place. Unfortunately bad horsemanship isn't illegal in most cases. Unless it's shows visible marks or you have some sort visual proof of abuse I don't think you can do much. Only other option is to try to educate the owners but some people can ignore logic staring them in the face. Sorry your in this position.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Yes, I will be doing my darndest to buy him off them. I'm not sure I'm ready for the commitment of owning a horse, but I refuse to stand idly by and let this happen.
  • TraceyG1971
    TraceyG1971 Posts: 123
    Offer to buy him anyway. Aside from that, I thought when you lease a horse that it basically becomes yours to ride when you want to and the owner doesn't ride it. Not sure since I have never leased a horse but I know that if I were to do so, then I would make sure that it was mine during the lease period and no one else would be riding it and undoing what I've taught.

    I'm really sorry that Jackson is having to deal with bad horsemanship. I hope you will be able to get this resolved in your favor.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Thanks - I suppose it's a lesson learned the hard way. If I can't buy him, I'm going to have to walk away. I can't keep paying money for the privilege of re-training their horse whenever they wreck it.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Quick update: talked to some others in the barn who agree with me that this situation can't go on. But they think that I might be in with a chance of buying him - the owner is apparently strapped for cash. (I'm already paying the livery fees for the privilege of riding.) And since the bottom has fallen out of the market, even if I pay slightly over his true value, I'm looking at a month's wages. Not cheap, but possible.
  • TraceyG1971
    TraceyG1971 Posts: 123
    I sure hope that you get to buy him. That would be great!!!
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Indeed. And I just saw an ad yesterday for a yard 5 minutes from where I work that specifically says they have the facilities and experience for doing natural horsemanship (alas very rare in Ireland), so he might be moving as well...
  • MAGNIFIEDME
    MAGNIFIEDME Posts: 52 Member
    That's fantastic news, I'll be so happy if this all works out for you - there's no point in buying him if you can't find him a new barn and "woo hoo" a natural barn at that. Yes they are very hard to come by, there are lots in Niagara that say they use a natural way but not everyone at the barns do.
    Wishing you the best on this, keep us up to date on your progress.
    Maggie
  • suzetteducrepe
    suzetteducrepe Posts: 34 Member
    I am keeping my fingers crossed for you and Jackson! :heart:
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    :smile: Thanks. As my mother said, "let's face it, you're going to buy a horse sooner or later anyway - so why not this one?"
  • singer201
    singer201 Posts: 563 Member
    It's always a bonus to be able to buy a horse that you've ridden a lot and cared for--you've seen him at his best and his worst, and if you love him and he suits your riding level and goals, go for it!
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    I've just put in an offer. He didn't say no - he said "I paid more for him than that" and went off to think about a counteroffer...
  • luv2all
    luv2all Posts: 44 Member
    Positive thoughts to you and Jackson!!
  • TraceyG1971
    TraceyG1971 Posts: 123
    Best of luck to you and Jackson!!! :)
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    No news so far, he still has to "think about it". Meanwhile, at the yard where Jack is kept, the hay has run out. Completely. Horse owners now have to find their own.

    That might motivate him to sell, but would also make it more difficult to buy...
  • Irkalla
    Irkalla Posts: 9 Member
    Talk about a shoddily run stable... There would be a mutiny at mine if that happened! (partly because the owners grow some of it themselves)

    Might I ask just how it would make it more difficult to buy? If he can't feed Jackson, animal services (SPCA where I live) would seize him, which means he can't sell and wouldn't make a penny. :/
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    The weird weather this year means the hay has run out everywhere, and the animals *still* can't go out into the fields because the grass just isn't growing - so it isn't the stable's fault! It just can't be bought at the moment. Some stables have shut down entirely because of it, and just told everyone to get out.

    That's why it would make it more difficult - if I owned him, finding forage would become my problem.
  • danekin
    danekin Posts: 21
    You can either try and buy the horse, but this will not fix the issue for future horses owned by this person. You can try and collect evidence of abuse and then report him. There are heaps of horse wellfare groups that will persue it. Or you can talk to him, find out what he is doing with the horse. You'd be surprised how many people just have bad information about working with horses. Spreading knowledge on effective and appropriate care of horses should be a responsibility of every horse owner. There are other forms of abuse aside from bad training such as not worming appropriately, not keeping the paddock clean, over feeding, under feeding, hoof neglect. Maybe this person just needs some sort of advice.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Unfortunately, he prides himself on never haven taken a riding lesson in his life...

    Saw him trying to make a horse move over sideways today, by pulling its tail!
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    *sigh* still no news on the selling front, but today, the owner was bragging about his "training methods" for a kid's pony that include thumbtacks in the bridle!
  • jumpthemoon
    jumpthemoon Posts: 152 Member
    *sigh* still no news on the selling front, but today, the owner was bragging about his "training methods" for a kid's pony that include thumbtacks in the bridle!

    That would be enough for me to report him! Hoping you get this lovely boy and AWAY from this man and his son. If you do purchase Jackson, DO NOT let the old owners know where he will be stabled. It sounds like you're doing everything to give this horse reassurance and gentle training and that's what he needs. He sounds terrified and it's scary to think an untrained person owns him, let alone jumping him without any training. Who knows if he's even vetted for that kind of event? Best of luck! Wish I could send some U.S. hay over to you....
  • luvriden
    luvriden Posts: 52
    What a mess you are having to deal with :-( Sure hope you get to buy him!!
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Thanks, Jumpthemoon, but the hay situation has fortunately improved now...

    Today I noticed that his shoes have now been on so long there are cracks developing around the nails and the clenches are standing proud. It's always something. Maybe I should make a list and report the owner. Grrr.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    I take it back. It hasn't improved. Today, he was back to being terrified and aggressive - he bit me so hard it drew blood, then stood there shaking.
  • moss11
    moss11 Posts: 236 Member
    I do hope you get a good result with this. Horses rely on us for their care and guidance. Hopefully he can view you as a friend rather than an enemy. What caused him to bite you? I hope it's not too painful. Keep trying we need people like you!
  • Terri_Wickwire
    Terri_Wickwire Posts: 149 Member
    I am so sorry ... for both you and Jackson. My first horse was a lease, Windy, a little gray gelding that had been starved and abused. It was a $25 a month lease when I was 17 (thanks Mom -- you changed my life!). Unfortunately, when a horse is leased, it's just "borrowed" and unless there is some type of contract, the lessor is out of luck. After spending months rehabilitating him, the owner returned to a happy, healthy horse ... took him from me and sold him. I pray you and Jackson fair far better than Windy and I ... :flowerforyou:
  • norrishbex
    norrishbex Posts: 35 Member
    I think unfortunately you have 2 options with this horse:

    1. Buy it from its owner asap, or
    2. Walk away before you get badly hurt.

    As heartbreaking as it would be to walk away from this poor creature, you need to always be safe. And while he's being ruined by the owner, you can't be safe.

    It is heart wrenching though, the poor poor horse.
  • RodeoRamsey
    RodeoRamsey Posts: 5 Member
    I agree with everyone else but just want to add, if you do end up buying this horse, make sure you get a SIGNED BILL OF SALE. Preferably with a witness or two to the transaction. This seems to be the type of person who would come back a year later and try to accuse you of theft. Good luck!
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Thanks, everyone - no reply from the owner yet, but at least he's settled a bit again.

    I believe you're right, norrishbex, but it *is* heartbreaking. I feel all responsible for him now, and can't just abandon him to his fate.