Discrimination
Options
julieworley376
Posts: 444 Member
I don't know if any of you have ever googled and read any of the hate boards on obesity. I have and been sickened by some of the things that have been said. I found one that referred to us as 'Land Whales'.
Do you feel that you have ever been discriminated against because of your weight? Do you have any stories to share?
Do you feel that you have ever been discriminated against because of your weight? Do you have any stories to share?
0
Replies
-
I've had women look me up and down with disgust!!! when i used to go shopping. I think there is a degree of (what I call) Fatest people around who have no respect for fat people.
I think it affects getting a job in interview as well in certain cases.0 -
Discrimination against larger people is real. I would bet that all of us have experienced it to some degree. The sad thing is that it seems to be accepted more readily than other forms of discrimination.0
-
I could be working faster than everyone else, and employers think I'm slower. There is also no discrimination law against hiring obese people. I was turned down for a job for Pepsico , I was qualified for, simply because of their physical fitness test.
They did the drug testing and everything. They even went over commision and pay with me. I should of got it. Serious letdown.0 -
I believe my current weight has prevented me getting a promotion recently too. There were no outward signs, but let's face it in the US they are looking at insurance liability and they are much more concious of that with the rise of wellness programs.
I know a family member who weighs probably 350-400 lbs, she has a Masters degree but is working in a minimum wage job part time because she can't get a job. I will bet almost anything if she walked in to an intervew at healthy weight she would be snapped up.0 -
I haven't experienced it a lot ( i was bullied in elementary school by vicious girl who was no light weight herself). It's more the fear or anxiety I have of being looked down app on or putting myself in an embarrassing situation. I'm self employed so every time I go to meet a new client I'm always wondering, what do they think of me. I can be glad that in my work I have meet and work with lovely people. But it's always in the back of my mind, wondering if they think my weight is somehow tied with my competency at my work. I know it isn't and the work demonstrates that since i'm usually working one on one with people. But I do at times tie my sense of competency with my eight. It's one of many pushes in the right direction, that I want to look how I feel about the work I can do.0
-
I once had a man get out of his car, scream in the middle of a parking lot about how huge I was, then proceed to dump a bottle of soda on my car. Many times I've been mooed at in public. Once I was with my kids in the mall and these "men" behind us were making loud rude comments about me. I was so embarrassed that we left and I didn't leave the house for over a week. I really hate knowing that some people think that I must be stupid or I would know how to not be fat. I actually had someone say that to me one time. It took all my will power to not slap that woman. I think if people had to live in our skin for a week they would have at least a little idea how horrible it can be.0
-
Group of frat boys oinked at me and made pig calls. I was 21 years old, on a date with a new guy, and 200 pounds thinner than I am now.0
-
I didn't think of going back into childhood but... I was bullied unmercifully at school, in fact the first time I realized I was different from other kids I was 5 yrs old at school and we were doing rhymes, the Farmers in his Den. I got to be picked to be the bone whereupon all the kids started laughing and one yelled, she is too fat to be the bone!
I had my tonsils out when I was 7 years old and apologized to the nurse who sat with me while I had a bath that I was so fat and she had to look at me.
I went to a birthday party and one of the mothers wouldn't let me play on the trampoline in case I broke it, ditto a spacehopper belonging to a friend.. in case I burst it because of my weight.
When I was around 8 I had dental work and they had to put me under with gas, I woke up during the procedure and heard someone say.. oh no the fat ***** is going to be sick. I asked my Mom what that meant.. she was very angry. My Mom was beautifully slim btw.. as were my three much older siblings.0 -
Wow... so sad that we were tormented and ostracized!
On the positive side, these types of stories are going to be AWESOME for our reality show. I can see the producers doing our interviews and hearing this stuff and thinking "Wow!" Thailand here we come!!!0 -
LOL how are you doing with a contact for the reality show Karen?0
-
I am the middle of 5 and 4 of us are heavy, obese, morbidly obese and we've all gone through forms of discrimination and we've all experienced discrimination because of our weight.
It was bad for me when I was a child, hearing one girl in the neighborhood continuously calling me Petunia Pig. As a teenager, I had experiences in high school (and this was an all girl's Catholic High School). There were times I've heard people take behind my back. One time, I heard boys talking, not thinking I could hear them. "She's cute, but she's heavy."
What I hate is the mindset of people who think heavy people are lazy, don't want to lose weight, are not healthy.
Being heavy does not equate unhealthiness and I'm sick and tired of those who think they are one in the same.0 -
Oh I have had that kind of thing too claudie.. I had people tell my ex husband.. she is beautiful.. shame she is so fat.0
-
I cannot believe some of these stories you all had to go through, especially as children from the adults. That is so terrible. I had a few things that I still remember as an adult when I was a kid, mostly when I was around 9 and moved to a new school. My name is Heather so they would taunt "Heather isn't as light as a feather, she's as heavy as a Chevy" But that only lasted for a couple weeks. I always ignored them. The only other time was in 7th grade I was walking to Volleyball practice and one kid caught me in the hall and said "Omg, you're in volleyball? I'm surprised you can even walk, let alone play volleyball!" I was always big, but I went from chunky to tall and just big. I wasn't teased much at all so that one comment really caught me off guard. I saw him when I was 30 and invited him to my 30th birthday party and told him he was a complete *kitten* for saying it, but all was forgiven.. He is fat now! HA!
Anyways, my biggest tormentor has always been myself. I was the one who would put me down with the terrible comments in my head and self-hatred. I didn't have to hear others say it. For the most part, I am ignored when I am fat. I am completely invisible. Sometimes, when I have had too much to drink and I go out to a bar with friends and look in the mirror, I start to get beer googles on and think I look good and think why aren't these people looking at me like they used to.. then I remember, Oh yeah, you aren't the girl that turns heads anymore.. you are fat. You don't exist.
I also have gone from you should model, you are so pretty to the next year having a store clerk refuse to sell me cigarettes because she didn't believe my ID was mine because I had gained so much weight. She was so rude! That probably hurt me more than anything.
Oh oh and one more thing. My freaking crazy butt mother in law.. it's not really discrimination related as nothing I have really posted is, but she told my husband she is afraid they are going to see me on the news one day and that they are going to have to cut me out of the house because I am too big to fit through the door. This is after having only met me once. NICE. Damn, I know I am fat, but really? Not be able to fit through the door?0 -
I didn't think about putting my childhood experiences down but i was given a nickname at school called "piggy bonnett' . The stupid thing was I wasn't that fat at school, perhaps 16 pounds over. Bur because of that name and it humiliation, i soon became fatter and fatter. I still hate the boy who gave me that name. He contacted me on facebook not so long ago, not knowing who I was? I told him exactly what I thought of him...and i didn't get an apology, or a response.
Being fat has dominated my life, and the world loves to make jokes at our expense. If only they knew how much it hurts our feelings.0 -
I don't so much think of what has happened in the past, as what I am holding myself back from. I know I haven't been particularly one-on-one type of supportive with anyone here yet, but I am so very good and supporting and healing others, and so very not able to do so for myself. Because of that, I've been told, "Why would anyone come to you for advice when you don't have your own *kitten* together?" "Who wants a fat life coach?" and so forth. All of it usually meant in a "reality" way, not meanly, just didn't want me to try and fall flat on my face. But it is one of the things I'm best at, one of the things I enjoy most...that I get the most satisfaction out of doing. I am currently trying to gather the gumption to figure out what has to be done to be properly trained, educated, and or licensed in this category. I know I can be seriously down on myself sometimes, but I am lifted up most when I am able to help others lift themselves. Such irony, no? But primarily, it is my weight holding me back at this point, the weight and all the mental baggage and BS that goes with it!
Aside from that, I don't have any specific memories that I choose to remember about being fat and bullied for it. I don't know if I was ever turned down for something because of weight. I've always been told I carry my weight well, so people never believe I weigh what i do... Anyway, my heart breaks a dozen times over for all y'all have had to endure!
Hugs and love to alll!!! We are so much stronger together,
Carly in OK0 -
Carly, I would have no problems taking advice/suggestions from you. You have successfully lost 85 lbs while I am struggling to reach a 10 lb loss and maintain that loss.
Andrea in Pennsylvania0 -
I'm not going to get into childhood and highschool . Too many stories some even include physical assault just because I was fat (yes punched in my stomach just because I was fat).
The story that always resonates with me was twenty some years ago. I was probably 50 to 75lbs lighter than I am now. I had walked to a local theater from my apartment to go see Thelma and Louise. I remember walking out of that movie feeling so moved and so empowered. I loved it! I felt uplifted and ready to take on the world!
So instead of going straight home I decided to take a walk in a nearby park. It was a beautiful late summer afternoon. There was lots of shade from the trees. There was the burbling of a stream flowing through the park and my mind was filled with hope and possibility.
Then a car drove by me. It slowed down and a guy leaned out the window and yelled, "Hey! Know why you're alone? Cuz you're fat and ugly!"
The car sped off and in that one moment all those wonderful powerful feelings were just gone. I tried not to let it bother me. I tried to sink my hurt into a different emotion. It was a long walk home.
Over the years I've gotten over the hurt and anger. However, I've never forgotten and for the life of me I can't figure out what kind of person is so ...damaged or feels so powerless in their own lives that they have to be so cruel to be entertained or to feel superior.0 -
I've went through crap for being fat. Back in school, they used to call me Moby **** at the bus stop. They tried to burn me with cigarettes. I dealt with all that and they weren't satisfied. So, a guy got 3 girls to beat me up at once, all because I was fat. They all jumped on me and I beat the **** out of all 3 of them. Then, later that day, around the apartments, ,they got 5 of them together to beat me up. I stayed in doors, b/c I was afraid I couldn't handle 5 of them at once. A friend called to police and the police got on them, then came to our apt and told my father how I beat up those first 3 girls at once and what how good I was at defending myself. After that, I quit riding the bus, and began walking all the way to and from school--about 5 miles a day round trip. I began to lose weight. After I lost about 90 pounds, one of the girls who had tired to beat me up, came and told me how good I looked and wanted to be my friend--just because I looked better. I told her I didn't want anything to do with her.
Then, in 1996, I got a bad spinal injury and I've had severe weight problems ever since then, not being able to walk, stand, bend, lift, or do much of anything anymore. I now have diabetes too. At a diabetes meeting a couple of months ago, a friend at the gym said to me on the way out of the class, "You have lots of problems with what you should be eating." I found that very offensive because my problems stem from me not being about to walk, stand, bend, lift things and these things keep my weight on mostly. That friend at the gym, just looked at me and assumed that I eat bad, because of my horrible weight problem and that was so stupid and inconsiderate. I resented that. There is so much people don't know that like a med I"m on helped me gain about 150 lbs-for real---along with me not being about to exercise with my back.
People are so ignorant and inconsiderate about people with weight issues. They just assume that everyone with a weight problem is lazy and eats a ton of food. That's so wrong. People don't have a clue how hard it is, unless they've been morbidly obese.0
