I don't know about you, but I like comfy clothes. I'm allergic to metal, so most jeans won't work for me. I get an awful rash where the button touches my tummy. So, I pretty much have only ever worn elastic waists, even when I was skinny. Except when I was in high school and just dealt with an itchy, scabby belly, because, you know, nothing came between me and my Calvins. But I digress...

I've lost 50 pounds and only come down one size. I started at 24/26. I'm currently in 22s, I think, and they're just starting to get loose. It may be different if you wear fitted clothes, but most of my things have some give and take to them. I think many clothes over size 20 are intentionally designed that way.

I anticipate that the lower my weight gets, the smaller the range in sizing will get. But I don't really know what weight a 16 will be. 170 ish?

I'll tell you this, though, if my mother gave me her "fat clothes" I think I'd burn them. The concept of "I'll show her" could totally blow up in your face and become "I can't even wear my mother's fat clothes after 6 months. I'm such a failure. Where's that plate of brownies?"

I don't know, something about it just feels toxic to me. Be really sure that's a goal you're comfortable setting for yourself and do it for *you*, not her. My mother's voice in my head is just awful to me and I work hard just to keep her mouth shut. If your inner (healthy) voice is saying keep your distance, there's probably a good reason. For me, and most people I know, weight loss is such an emotional journey, it's best to proceed cautiously if something may be a trigger for you.

(Hugs)

Caroline

I won't go into the potential toxicity/competition aspect, but I will tell you this. Sizes are more about inches than pounds. Because if you are gaining muscle but losing fat, you could still weigh the same or actually gain pounds, but be smaller. Two and a half years ago, I lost 50 pounds and shrunk quite a bit. Then, over the intervening years, I gained back about 22 pounds.

When I lost the first "round" of weight, I did so primarily through food restriction/calorie counting/etc. This time around I have combined food and exercise. I am a size smaller in clothing than I was the last time I was at this weight. So weight isn't the number to look for - but rather overall fitness and health, combined with exercise to whittle down your numbers.

I realized one day that I had dropped 24 pounds since February (when I rebooted) - and I had also lost 24 inches!! It was crazy. I was shocked. I've been "off the wagon" for a while now, but I'm getting moving again and trying to beat the heat. Being on BP meds and such finally has given me the freedom to be less scared to push now....

Good luck!

I'll tell you this, though, if my mother gave me her "fat clothes" I think I'd burn them. The concept of "I'll show her" could totally blow up in your face and become "I can't even wear my mother's fat clothes after 6 months. I'm such a failure. Where's that plate of brownies?"

I don't know, something about it just feels toxic to me. Be really sure that's a goal you're comfortable setting for yourself and do it for *you*, not her. My mother's voice in my head is just awful to me and I work hard just to keep her mouth shut. If your inner (healthy) voice is saying keep your distance, there's probably a good reason. For me, and most people I know, weight loss is such an emotional journey, it's best to proceed cautiously if something may be a trigger for you.

(Hugs)

Caroline

I really don't want to discourage you; but, I'm sorry, I have to agree with Caroline. Maybe it's different for you but my mother has always been very critical of me. I can never lose enough for her and even if I lose quite a bit it's never fast enough. My mother would continually throw the clothes in my face....have you gotten in to my "fat clothes" yet, taking you a long time to get into the, etc. Not to mention what I'd be doing to myself mentally after her cutting me down. It has taken me many years to get to the point where my mom's opinions don't matter (though I must confess occasionally she still gets to me but it's fewer and farther between). Like I said, maybe your different but it just worries me. You have had such awesome progress and I would really hate to see you regress. Just food for thought and my opinions. Like I said, I don't want to discourage you and I will support always support you.

I'm feeling bad about sounding too judgey with my response. If it makes you feel good, work for those pants! My main thought is you need to feel good. That's it. Just you. Not you mom. Not me. Just. You.

You can do this! With or without those pants....

There isn't really a correlation between how many pounds you have to lose to go down a size. We all carry our weight in different places and it does not come off everywhere at once. Also sizes are not the same from designer to designer, so one size 16 will not be the same as another.

Personally as I've lost weight I've taken clothes from anyone willing to help. I stared in size 26/28 pants and I'm down to size 16. The next ones I buy will probably be 14s. I've been trying to minimize the cost of my transition wardrobe, so I've been trying to get away with wearing tops as long as I can and the fewest pairs of pants that I can get away with. I've been offered clothes by others several times, and I've always taken them. Even if they aren't something I would have chosen for myself, I will wear them while they fit, and then donate them forward.

Don't let your mother set your goal. You set the goal you want. It can be a clothing size, a weight or some other health related goal, but setting your own goals is part of the process. You need to own this healthy lifestyle change and you need to want it. There have been days where that want was the only thing helping me get up to exercise or keeping me from stuffing my face. If it had been some externally set goal, I would have given up months ago.