Mom Guilt
danalynne87
Posts: 5 Member
I hope I am not the only one out there to experience "Mom Guilt". I am a single mom and I work full time. Recently my doctor told me that I need to lose some weight in order to get back into a healthy place. I have difficulty with both pieces of the puzzle to get healthy... I eat crappy and I am not very active. My job consists of me sitting at a desk in front of my computer all day. So meals are anything quick (and typically unhealthy). I recently signed my 4 year old up for karate and while I was there the teacher told me about Kickboxing classes that they offer that I could sign up for. How awesome! I was super excited until I thought about it and realized that would be 2 nights a week that I would need to leave my son with someone (family or a babysitter) and there came the mom guilt. Last year I had done really well with my activity and took up running but the mom guilt came on when I was supposed to go for a run and my son cried that he didn't want me to go. I slowly stopped running until I didn't run at all anymore.
How do you deal with the mom guilt? I know I need to put my healthy as a priority and get my butt in gear but I am not sure how to get rid of the guilt.
How do you deal with the mom guilt? I know I need to put my healthy as a priority and get my butt in gear but I am not sure how to get rid of the guilt.
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My kids love the childcare at the gyms so they beg me to go. They also really like our babysitter because she brings special arts and crafts that they don't get to do otherwise. Them liking what they are doing makes it easier for me to be away. Is there something special the person looking after your son could do?
He is also a year older so that could help. I really liked when I did kickboxing (at a boxing gym). It made me feel super bad *kitten*. I took a bus to get there (because parking was terrible) and people were always impressed by the boxing gloves. However, I did find it a hard commitment with kids and I only did the 12 lesson set. I still enjoy the kickboxing classes at the gym but they don't make me feel super tough!0 -
I understand. As a single mom, I sometimes feel bad because although my daughter is in school all day not at daycare, I still hate having to have someone else watch her for me to do my thing. Honestly though it is for the good of both you and your son for you to be in good health. I have come to realize that I'm not taking time from my family but actually making myself healthier so I have more time with them and feel better for them and myself. A couple or three times a week to devote and hour or two for improving your health is a small price to pay.
My daughter is now old enough she comes to kickboxing (women's fitness) class with me. She sometimes joins in as the teacher doesn't mind, but mostly she just sits quietly at the back of the room and reads or plays on her tablet. I figure I spend most of my evenings and weekends on her activities (softball, basketball, etc.) so me taking a few hours a week for myself to improve my health is well worth it in the long run. I'll be around longer for her and have more energy now for her too.0 -
danifo0811 wrote: »My kids love the childcare at the gyms so they beg me to go. They also really like our babysitter because she brings special arts and crafts that they don't get to do otherwise. Them liking what they are doing makes it easier for me to be away. Is there something special the person looking after your son could do?
He is also a year older so that could help. I really liked when I did kickboxing (at a boxing gym). It made me feel super bad *kitten*. I took a bus to get there (because parking was terrible) and people were always impressed by the boxing gloves. However, I did find it a hard commitment with kids and I only did the 12 lesson set. I still enjoy the kickboxing classes at the gym but they don't make me feel super tough!
We have a YMCA membership and my 5 yr old twins LOVE child care there. They often beg to go. I do feel guilty about taking the 3 month old. He is already in day care so that just adds on more time he's in someoneelses care
. Then I remind myself that it's usually during his nap time anyway, lol, and I'm getting healthier to improve the quality of our time spent together. Also, our lives pretty much revolve around our older kids and their activities so I know the baby's day will come. We all deserve a bit of time to ourselves.
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I think that many of us with kids can relate to this. We put our kids (and our jobs) and our other obligations first and ourselves last.
Someone once equated it to the instructions you get on an airplane flight that if the oxygen masks drop down, put your own mask on first , then help children and others.
It makes sense but it's tough to look after ourselves first in practice.0 -
Thanks everyone! It helps to know I am not the only parent who is thinking too much about time away from my little guy.0
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