Borderline personality disorder

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At the moment, I'm not doing too good mentally, I have borderline personality disorder, post traumatic stress disorder because of child abuse and an eating disorder.

Because of my eating disorder, severe depression doesn't block my motivation to lose weight and exercise like it used to. A couple of years ago, if I was depressed, I refused to move, let alone exercise but now, I use exercise to vent my overwhelming emotions and I actually feel better afterwards.

Does anyone else here have borderline personality disorder and does it affect your dieting and exercising? It's definitely affecting my diet but in a dangerous way.

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  • BlackPup
    BlackPup Posts: 242 Member
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    I don't have BPD but do have Bipolar 2. The meds I'm on make me hungry but I've just gone on a med that suppresses my appetite so that balances things out. Feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like :)
  • CherylMatthews66
    CherylMatthews66 Posts: 44 Member
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    Your medication made you hungry? My antidepressant Mirtazipine is meant to increase your appetite but fortunately, I haven't got that side effect. I'm glad they put you on an appetite suppressant :) I've added you as a friend :smile:
  • AtomicCupcake1
    AtomicCupcake1 Posts: 65 Member
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    I too have bpd, as well as mood disorder, severe anxiety and ADD. I am pretty much a couch potato and lack any motivation to get off my butt and exercise.
  • Terraforcejenny
    Terraforcejenny Posts: 47 Member
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    I don't have BPD but one of my best friends has it; like you, she initially was overwhelmed by depression and had a lot of problems with getting motivated physically. She doesn't have PTSD, but I do (as well as ADHD-C and MDD).

    Since her and I didn't have the same diagnosis but often overlapped on medications, we compared a lot of our issues with activity level and dieting. We were often on the same SSRI meds, and a lot of the things they tried with her I'd been on in the past when they weren't sure if I had bipolar.

    We both struggled with unhealthy relationships with our diets, in different ways but both bad.

    We both binged at points; I often had struggles with appetite throughout the day, which would lead to rapid consumption of *anything* later on, followed by depression and insomnia, etc.

    She would often eat emotionally; lots of sugars and carbs mostly, anything you could eat constantly.

    But, it got real concerning when she felt the worst about herself; not eating became a sort of...satisfying punishment? She'd view eating/not eating as a reflection of her character.

    It sucked, because she was obese at the time, so people wouldn't take her seriously when she refused to eat.Nobody considered that part of the reason she struggled to lose weight were these cycles of starvation-and-tonsoffood. Some of it was her build (and she does actually have some health issues that contribute to her size and composition), but a lot of it was stuff like this.

    I also struggled too; I lost a lot of weight when I motivated myself with negative self-talk. I was still eating, but it was easier to eat spinach+lots of fruit+ beans as protein, everyday (I worked at the grocery near the salad bar so it was easily accessed) when it all tasted the same due to being depressed. I just sort of...zombie walked throughout the day, and before I knew it, I'd started losing weight.

    But both of us would always rebound. That kind of motivation isn't sustainable; either you end up in the hospital (which she ended up at some point), or your body will eventually say "ENOUGH" (like it did to me, and I ended up bingeing due to poor nutrition and suddenly missing food). And both of our bodies were worse off; neither of us really got that 'healthy slim' or anything, and we looked very sick.

    In actuality? I've become healthier following the slow-and-steady route than the harsher ways we were treating ourselves a few years ago.

    I don't know if this helps at all. I can give more details on her lifestyle now (and compared to 2-3 years ago when she was first diagnosed) or mine as well.
  • Jilligogo
    Jilligogo Posts: 6 Member
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    I have BPD, GAD, and MDD; I'm currently in a daily, six-hour outpatient therapy program. Often I don't eat much while there because of anxiety and when I come home I want to binge-eat an entire chocolate cake. I have no spoons to exercise before or after.
    I'm at a really frustrating time in my transition to a healthier lifestyle, but I feel like all i can do is keep grinding.