Self love during weight gain
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lauraaleshire
Posts: 15 Member
Hello Moms! I'm on my second pregnancy and honestly having a harder time this time with self love during the weight gain dance. Has anyone else felt that way? First pregnancy I gained 50 pounds, and gave birth to a tall (she's still tall) but proportional baby - 9lb, 3oz. I lost all the weight except 4 pounds, but felt constantly guilty post partum for my weight gain. I even remember seeing a doctor early into my second trimester who told me most women don't gain any weight by that time which made me feel terrible. I'm now 13 wks tomorrow and I've gained about 4 pounds. I think that's in the healthy range, but I've been writing down everything I'm eating and just thinking about it all a ton more this time. As a result I often feel worse about my body because I'm just constantly worried about gaining too much again. Last time I felt proud of my baby bump and put it on display as soon as I could. This time my belly and breasts are popping a little sooner (I know that's normal), but I can't help but feel worried I am (and look) fat. Last time 95% of the numerous comments were sweet and positive, but the remaining 5% ("Are you carrying twins?" "Any day now" (at 6 months), and "Look at that belly. She's just like Kim Kardashian.") make me feel like I should hide this pregnancy as long as I can. Which doesn't seem like it'll be long. Not sure how to get back to my place of love for my body and what it's doing again.
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4lbs at 13 weeks is totally normal! I don't have much advise as I am a FTM and really struggle with body image myself but wanted to say I understand
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Omg I completely understand how you feel. I am 15+4 with my third and I have already gained like 12-15 lbs. I spoke with my midwife about it cause I honestly feel lousy some days and because my bmi pre pregnancy was around 20 she is okay with me gaining 40-45 lbs which I'm okay with also.
But every day is a struggle. I spent 2.5 years after my second losing 120 lbs so the fear is always there about gaining it all back.
But just remember to eat healthy and only when hungry (the best you can) and you're body will gain what it needs and it won't be as difficult to get rid of.
It's the one time where we're allowed to gain weight (within reason of course lol).
Try and enjoy your pregnancy and feel free to message me if you ever want to vent 1 -
You're doing great, no matter what you've gained! ❤️ it's just too bad that people feel the need to comment and scrutinize pregnant bodies, just when you're at your most vulnerable and don't often feel the most attractive. Well I didn't at least! I am on pregnancy #2 and with my first I was often in tears over my "new" body which I felt betrayed by, if that makes sense? I knew everything was normal, I gained only 25 lbs, but I struggled daily with feeling beautiful and worried constantly about how I looked. My husband was beyond supportive but that only went so far. It's hard to feel like yourself when your body isn't your own.
You sound like you're doing a great job being healthy and keeping everything in check. You're doing the best you can and I can offer support and friendship!! I know how you feel so much! Enjoy your bump1 -
Thank you, ladies! It's just nice to know that I'm not alone. Pregnancy is a rollercoaster of feeling out of control with my body and simultaneously excited for the little one growing inside of it. In the last two days it almost seems like a switch turned on and I've been STARVING constantly. It was much easier to stay reasonable before this. I'm trying small, regular, healthy, high protein snacks throughout the day and trying to get to a point of acceptance that my body and my baby may just need a little extra fuel right now, but it may have triggered some things in me. Yesterday I also put together a list of movies with strong pregnant characters to watch and be inspired/remind myself of why my body is going through these changes. Hopefully that'll help me further embrace the fact that I'm sharing this body right now and so it may need different things from me.4
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lauraaleshire wrote: »Thank you, ladies! It's just nice to know that I'm not alone. Pregnancy is a rollercoaster of feeling out of control with my body and simultaneously excited for the little one growing inside of it. In the last two days it almost seems like a switch turned on and I've been STARVING constantly. It was much easier to stay reasonable before this. I'm trying small, regular, healthy, high protein snacks throughout the day and trying to get to a point of acceptance that my body and my baby may just need a little extra fuel right now, but it may have triggered some things in me. Yesterday I also put together a list of movies with strong pregnant characters to watch and be inspired/remind myself of why my body is going through these changes. Hopefully that'll help me further embrace the fact that I'm sharing this body right now and so it may need different things from me.
LOL yes I've been starving too lately it feels like. Don't ya just love pregnancy? Lol.
Also, that's a very good idea about the movies. Which ones have you come up with? Cause I would love to do that too especially on days I am feeling a little down.0 -
Juno, Away We Go, Waitress are classics in my mind. For those who don't mind a bit of a darker movie Fargo, Children of Men both have great pregnant characters. Would love any other ideas people have.0
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lauraaleshire wrote: »Juno, Away We Go, Waitress are classics in my mind. For those who don't mind a bit of a darker movie Fargo, Children of Men both have great pregnant characters. Would love any other ideas people have.
Well there is always Knocked Up.
And the movie Junior with Arnold Swartzaneger although that one has a pregnant man but still very funny. Lol.
A quick Google search gives lots more.
I'm wanting to watch Junior know haha.0 -
Love this thread. I think all pregnant women feel some stress here.
Something that has helped me is having friends here on MFP who have their babies and watch their weight loss after--much of it really does just fall off after delivery, and the rest will go soon enough if you make healthy choices. Keeping that in mind helps me feel less panicked about the ever-increasing number on the scale (I'm up about 10 pounds at 18 weeks) because I know it isn't here to stay. Also, maybe this is shallow, but part of why I think I feel better about my body this pregnancy (it's #3 for me) is that I have blown some cash on maternity clothes I love, not just whatever's adequate on the Target clearance rack. It makes a huge difference in how I feel when I'm in an outfit that's still cute and sexy rather than living in my husband's pajamas (not that I don't also do that some days haha). But seriously. Go shopping, keep a long-term perspective, know you're normal, and ignore dumb comments. That's my advice. 3
