Hi!

I am Jeannie aka Arewethereyet! First let me say it pained me to delete any and all threads asking for support within the community. I tried to send PM's letting ppl know why. I felt the same way about other groups, but knowing the special issues that are dealt with here made my heart hurt.

So here we are!!!

My daughter disclosed to me she was gay while I was away for the first time from my family for a 3 week training session. She was 16, and other than appearing to have a girl crush on a hottie on the soft ball team, I had no idea.

Uh, thanks hun. It sent me for a loop...........a huge loop. See, I am a Christian. My mom was Catholic and was excommunicated because she a. had me out of wedlock and b. she loved EVERYONE. Didn't care of they were gay, black, white, funny, stupid........mom loved the humans.

Thank God, I had made a friend in training that was THE coolest chick ever, and we are still friends. Jules reminded me NOTHING had changed. All I had to do was look within to see how I felt about it, not what was shoved down my throat for years.

I love Jesus. I love God. I could not beleive he didnt love my baby girl because of who she LOVED. Could not be. I had sat through so many hate filled sermens, I was so sad. I had always thought, "Eh, I love everyone, this is BS" But didnt stand UP, yaknow??

I felt like a hypocrit (sp) So I prayed, prayed until my knees bled. One night I awoke at 2 am......gently nudged awake. Having fallen asleep with the TV on, it was showing a preacher. (a very popular tv evangelist) His face was bright red, he was sweating, he was pounding my belove bible with his fist.

The audience was in a frenzy........seriously folks, it looked like a KKK rally. I 'heard' a voice say THIS IS NOT ME! Huh, confused.......I turned up the volumne. He was talking about the abomonation (sp) that was my pretty girl. Gay marriage was up for vote, and he was discussing....... .............if that is what you call it............making sure to go out and vote.

It was so bad I had a hard time watching, but watch I did. In my I kept hearing "THIS IS NOT ME!" It was not what God is about. He loves me, you, my daughter.

I cried until dawn. And then awoke, went to my daughter and hugged her like no tomorrow.

I am so thankful He revealed himself to me.

As for the issues with HER............well they were many

I love her with all my heart. By the time she was 13 she was 5' tall and 180 pounds. Why? Well then the boys wouldn't look at her!!!

She is 24 now and life is great. She is in nursing school, and has a partner. I was taught hate is not a family value!!

I think my favorite 2 stories are:

When Kelly came out to me I blurted out "But you SUCK at softball!!!"
( maybe you need to know my sense of humor, that eased her pain and made her LOL with me!!)

Then there was graduation. Once she came out she began to lose weight and look stunning. She was dressed in a beautiful above the knee white fitted dress, hair shining and blown straight down her back, legs tan and sleek.

The boy she had crushed on in 6th and 7th grade who had dissed the hell out of her came riding by in his hoopdee when she was bent over the trunk getting her gown. He slowed super and stared at her. S L O W.........then went around and came back for more.

I LOL and told Kel this boy had just done that. We made the requisite joke on it being fruitless.............but when he came around again she said "MOM that is ALEX!!!!" We then said BOOYA!

So we laughed and had a wonderful graduation, knowing she was who she is supposed to be.

I wish all families of Gay children had the same response as me, but they don't. My house became the hangout for the girls. They could be thereselves..........but even more I showed them at 14-18 they needed to the themselves. Their CHOICES where not their sexuality, but the way they present themselves to the world. Being gay was not about walking in a parade, but about who you love and are attracted to.

Most of these girls are doign awesome now. Some have told me it is because I loved them. I think it is my prayers for them to feel loved even when family were spewing hate at them. Or sending them away to be 'reprogrammed" Really? Wonder why the suicide rate is so high in this community.

Just want you all to know, I LOVE YOU! Just the way you are

Thanks so much for sharing both of your stories!

@arewethereyet Have you ever seen the film For the Bible Tells Me So? http://www.forthebibletellsmeso.org/indexb.htm

It is very moving--I cried more than once while watching it. I think it is available on Netflix.

Anyway, my brother is gay. He finally came out to my family last summer (at the age of 23) even though we've known for quite some time and no one had any problem with it whatsoever. I mean, my godfather (my mom's best friend from college) was a gay man! Also, my brother had been living with a man who attended Thanksgiving and Easter brunch with my family and also came to my wedding with my brother--so.... It's not like it was a big surprise. But my brother is just the most private person ever. I doubt that he would ever say anything about his relationship even if he were dating a woman. It just isn't how he rolls.

I am happy that he finally said it out loud to my parents, who were very supportive.

Thank you for starting this thread. It is so important that parents and family members love and support their LGBT+ children for who they are. My brother (technically, my half-brother) was gay - unfortunately, in March 2010, he took his own life. While he was accepted and loved by my dad and step-mom and the rest of the family, he never found a place where he felt "comfortable". He was super smart and one of the most kind and gentle people I've ever met. I miss him terribly.

Two years ago, my son told me that he is "probably" gay. This is another young man who hasn't found his place. He is a loner and pretty much a recluse. He just turned 19. I worry about him because he has no friends except a few he chats with online. He knows that I am totally supportive of the LGBT+ community and totally supportive of him. I wish I knew how to help him move out into the world...

I just want to suggest looking into PFLAG in your area or a Unitarian Universalist Church (not sure about your beliefs but just a suggestion)...it would give your son an AMAZING way to meet people who would accept and love him for him both in the LGBT community and allies.

Hi!

I am Jeannie aka Arewethereyet! First let me say it pained me to delete any and all threads asking for support within the community. I tried to send PM's letting ppl know why. I felt the same way about other groups, but knowing the special issues that are dealt with here made my heart hurt.

So here we are!!!

My daughter disclosed to me she was gay while I was away for the first time from my family for a 3 week training session. She was 16, and other than appearing to have a girl crush on a hottie on the soft ball team, I had no idea.

Uh, thanks hun. It sent me for a loop...........a huge loop. See, I am a Christian. My mom was Catholic and was excommunicated because she a. had me out of wedlock and b. she loved EVERYONE. Didn't care of they were gay, black, white, funny, stupid........mom loved the humans.

Thank God, I had made a friend in training that was THE coolest chick ever, and we are still friends. Jules reminded me NOTHING had changed. All I had to do was look within to see how I felt about it, not what was shoved down my throat for years.

I love Jesus. I love God. I could not beleive he didnt love my baby girl because of who she LOVED. Could not be. I had sat through so many hate filled sermens, I was so sad. I had always thought, "Eh, I love everyone, this is BS" But didnt stand UP, yaknow??

I felt like a hypocrit (sp) So I prayed, prayed until my knees bled. One night I awoke at 2 am......gently nudged awake. Having fallen asleep with the TV on, it was showing a preacher. (a very popular tv evangelist) His face was bright red, he was sweating, he was pounding my belove bible with his fist.

The audience was in a frenzy........seriously folks, it looked like a KKK rally. I 'heard' a voice say THIS IS NOT ME! Huh, confused.......I turned up the volumne. He was talking about the abomonation (sp) that was my pretty girl. Gay marriage was up for vote, and he was discussing....... .............if that is what you call it............making sure to go out and vote.

It was so bad I had a hard time watching, but watch I did. In my I kept hearing "THIS IS NOT ME!" It was not what God is about. He loves me, you, my daughter.

I cried until dawn. And then awoke, went to my daughter and hugged her like no tomorrow.

I am so thankful He revealed himself to me.

As for the issues with HER............well they were many

I love her with all my heart. By the time she was 13 she was 5' tall and 180 pounds. Why? Well then the boys wouldn't look at her!!!

She is 24 now and life is great. She is in nursing school, and has a partner. I was taught hate is not a family value!!

I think my favorite 2 stories are:

When Kelly came out to me I blurted out "But you SUCK at softball!!!"
( maybe you need to know my sense of humor, that eased her pain and made her LOL with me!!)

Then there was graduation. Once she came out she began to lose weight and look stunning. She was dressed in a beautiful above the knee white fitted dress, hair shining and blown straight down her back, legs tan and sleek.

The boy she had crushed on in 6th and 7th grade who had dissed the hell out of her came riding by in his hoopdee when she was bent over the trunk getting her gown. He slowed super and stared at her. S L O W.........then went around and came back for more.

I LOL and told Kel this boy had just done that. We made the requisite joke on it being fruitless.............but when he came around again she said "MOM that is ALEX!!!!" We then said BOOYA!

So we laughed and had a wonderful graduation, knowing she was who she is supposed to be.

I wish all families of Gay children had the same response as me, but they don't. My house became the hangout for the girls. They could be thereselves..........but even more I showed them at 14-18 they needed to the themselves. Their CHOICES where not their sexuality, but the way they present themselves to the world. Being gay was not about walking in a parade, but about who you love and are attracted to.

Most of these girls are doign awesome now. Some have told me it is because I loved them. I think it is my prayers for them to feel loved even when family were spewing hate at them. Or sending them away to be 'reprogrammed" Really? Wonder why the suicide rate is so high in this community.

Just want you all to know, I LOVE YOU! Just the way you are

Oh, Jeannie, you have me in tears. Thank you. I love YOU just the way you are. I have a daughter who is still sorting things out, but me being a person who is resistant to labels, I've encouraged her not to feel obligated to define herself for the benefit of others. She truly sees the person first, not the gender. To her, love is love. How beautiful is that? She is reluctant to label herself as "bi," and I see no reason for her to feel forced into defining herself, although if she is comfortable with a particular label in the future, that's OK by me too. This isn't anything that is particularly difficult for me or my husband, other than any pain our girl may deal with as a result of outside scrutiny. We have always had a very diverse and inclusive set of friends, and it has done nothing but enrich all of our lives.