Who is your enabler?

skmolove
skmolove Posts: 191 Member
My parents... they are food pushers. I love them dearly but I can't step foot in their home without loosing control. Maybe its a comfort thing...I know I'm weak & I need to find my inner strength to just say no to food when I visit.

Replies

  • laurabarden
    laurabarden Posts: 79 Member
    My husband....I love him dearly but he rarely eats well and always wants the fried foods. I know I should make two seperate meals but im too lazy and hate doing more dishes. My new years resolutions are to keep house better and encourage him to eat healthier too.
  • My mom, she hates the word "diet" and attempts to buy me junk food and then gets angry when I turn them down.
  • My husband. If I say I'm craving something he'll say "then have it".
  • hdm23
    hdm23 Posts: 2
    For me it's co-workers and husband. Someone is always bringing food into the office or wanting to go out for lunch. At home, I try to get hubby to eat healthy but it does not good. He needs to lose a lot of weight as well but I can't make him until he's ready. Ive just started making something for myself but i wish i didn't have to do that.
  • it is my husband....6 years of marriage and i put on 60 pounds! he is 6' with an active day job i am 5'4" and sits at a desk all day...when we eat i try to keep up with him, and i can't do it anymore...but i feel guilty when he wants to go out for burgers or pizza and i don't. eating together is what we do together and that needs to change...any suggestions for what married people can do together that doesn't involve food????
  • kwehkweh
    kwehkweh Posts: 70 Member
    To be really honest here, it's me. My husband and kids just follow my lead. I did good the first 8 months, losing 75 lbs, but then I felt I had done enough for the year. I lost another 15 but gained 10 back over the holidays. I was frustrated because it seemed like no matter what I did good, people talked to me about my weight. I could do something huge at work and instead of saying good job it was "Did you lose any weight this week?". Or instead of "Hows the family?" It was "Hows the weight loss coming?" I started letting myself slip because I was just really tired of the whole thing. But I'm back to being gung ho about it. And I've already lost 2 lbs since Sunday. Woot woot for new beginnings!
  • skmolove
    skmolove Posts: 191 Member
    eating together is what we do together and that needs to change...any suggestions for what married people can do together that doesn't involve food????

    thats a tough one...as a family we use food to celebrate, relax, when we are busy its easier to pick up fast food... we plan all week for where we'll go on the weekend. Like you, this is one thing that needs to change.

    With it being freezing cold outside its really hard for us to get out. So, I'd have to suggest bowling, movies, roller skating, or watch a highschool indoor sporting event. Make a home cooked meal and use the $ you'd spend on eating out to do a fun activiy; this will be my new challange.
  • skmolove
    skmolove Posts: 191 Member
    I started letting myself slip because I was just really tired of the whole thing. But I'm back to being gung ho about it. And I've already lost 2 lbs since Sunday. Woot woot for new beginnings!

    its hard, sometimes, weight loss requires alot of planning; for me, this is tiring. I can relate because I feel I'm getting so much time wrapped up into it; planning, reading lables, what to eat, when, how much, where, food journaling... but in the end I'm sure the work we put into it will be worth it.

    new year = new beginnings, keep at it!
  • thanks for the tips! i love bowling!
  • laurabarden
    laurabarden Posts: 79 Member
    Im in 3 challenges to stay motivated and so far its working. im in this group, lose 25 by mar 16, and now mfps biggest loser. I hope I can keep at it....this time it just feels different, ya know? I wasnt as excited about christmas as I was to start the new year off by losing weight. Im tired of not being able to do the things i used to. Dr Phil says "youre ready for change when you cant stand it for one more second of one more minute of one more hour of one more day" Im there! Im ready for a lifestyle change and a healthier new me. I just wish it were easier and faster! We can all do this! think positive!!
  • mejenniferd
    mejenniferd Posts: 18 Member
    Mostly me, but my husband too.

    I partially blame myself for HIS weight gain over the years (I know it's his body, his food, his choice, but I was definitely his enabler!)And now we both need to lose weight, but at any given moment one of us will want something that we shouldn't have as often as we do, and the other one will give in.
  • mejenniferd
    mejenniferd Posts: 18 Member
    To be really honest here, it's me. My husband and kids just follow my lead. I did good the first 8 months, losing 75 lbs, but then I felt I had done enough for the year. I lost another 15 but gained 10 back over the holidays. I was frustrated because it seemed like no matter what I did good, people talked to me about my weight. I could do something huge at work and instead of saying good job it was "Did you lose any weight this week?". Or instead of "Hows the family?" It was "Hows the weight loss coming?" I started letting myself slip because I was just really tired of the whole thing. But I'm back to being gung ho about it. And I've already lost 2 lbs since Sunday. Woot woot for new beginnings!

    I really hate how that happens. I hate how it becomes the ONLY topic of conversation.
  • kwehkweh
    kwehkweh Posts: 70 Member
    To be really honest here, it's me. My husband and kids just follow my lead. I did good the first 8 months, losing 75 lbs, but then I felt I had done enough for the year. I lost another 15 but gained 10 back over the holidays. I was frustrated because it seemed like no matter what I did good, people talked to me about my weight. I could do something huge at work and instead of saying good job it was "Did you lose any weight this week?". Or instead of "Hows the family?" It was "Hows the weight loss coming?" I started letting myself slip because I was just really tired of the whole thing. But I'm back to being gung ho about it. And I've already lost 2 lbs since Sunday. Woot woot for new beginnings!

    I really hate how that happens. I hate how it becomes the ONLY topic of conversation.
    I'm learning to tell people "While I love the fact that you're interested in my weight loss and that you're happy for me, I miss our conversations about other things. I don't mind talking about the weight loss, I just want you to know there's still more to me than that." My mother in law came out for Christmas and I had a break down in front of her and that's what she told me to tell people. It's worked so far.
  • skmolove
    skmolove Posts: 191 Member
    [/quote]
    I'm learning to tell people "While I love the fact that you're interested in my weight loss and that you're happy for me, I miss our conversations about other things. I don't mind talking about the weight loss, I just want you to know there's still more to me than that."
    [/quote]

    That's a wonderful reply & way to handle it :)
  • pennysteed
    pennysteed Posts: 80 Member
    My husband has to be my biggest enabler. I swear that he likes me better fluffy than he has ever liked me before. I have gotten to the point where I do not care. I cannot stand how I look anymore, so if that means cooking two meals a night, then that is what I am going to do. Since my final college classes are all at night, I have the house to myself all day, so after my two boys leave for school, I work out, do my errands, and then do my homework. Notice, I have working out first on the list, this way NO ONE can derail me this time. Since all of my friends have moved away, I do not have the support group that I once did, so I am doing this solo this time around. I haven't measured myself since starting two weeks ago, but have noticed that I need a belt now, and I have had to increase the incline and speed on my treadmill now. Even if the scale is not moving, I know that something positive is happening. Like others, my husband can stand to lose some weight, but first he has to want to do it. I am tired of trying to force the changes in the house since I know that he will combat it by bringing home fast food instead.
  • Marcy_Haws
    Marcy_Haws Posts: 9 Member
    my loving husband. i am trying so hard not to be over 200 pounds anymore. but he thinks i am perfect and doesnt think i need to push my body. so i can only work out when he isnt home so he doesnt know haha and i eat before he wakes up and after he leaves for work. i know once he sees how much better i feel that he will be more supportive. :) he is so sweet. he just loves me for who i am.
  • missmelissa919
    missmelissa919 Posts: 59 Member
    For me it's my bf of 6yrs. Im a stay at home mom. He works a lot so when we see eachother it's spending time together eating and watching t.v. This definetly needs to change.