Conundrum.
Steelheart7
Posts: 1,056
Have you ever thought that a person that you have met either through work .. dealing with them on the phone alot or someone that you met through online would be THE perfect person for you .. if only they lived near you?
I guess maybe that sounds odd. There is someone that I talk with almost on a daily basis and have since before Christmas .. that I tell you if he lived near me I totally think he would be it for me. Like I compare other men to him and they just aren't him. Does that make sense? He is hilarious, he is smart, we have so much in common, he is caring and sweet to me .. single .. lol. Aside from his football team of choice .. seems completely perfect.
I don't know .. it seems like an odd thing when I put it out there like that, but I am starting to think that if I am at the point where I am comparing him to other men that maybe this isn't such a good thing.
Thoughts or experience with this? :frown:
I guess maybe that sounds odd. There is someone that I talk with almost on a daily basis and have since before Christmas .. that I tell you if he lived near me I totally think he would be it for me. Like I compare other men to him and they just aren't him. Does that make sense? He is hilarious, he is smart, we have so much in common, he is caring and sweet to me .. single .. lol. Aside from his football team of choice .. seems completely perfect.
I don't know .. it seems like an odd thing when I put it out there like that, but I am starting to think that if I am at the point where I am comparing him to other men that maybe this isn't such a good thing.
Thoughts or experience with this? :frown:
0
Replies
-
It is very easy to happen,first thing is that all parties are usually on their best behavior so the quirks and bad habits are not seen.
There is something about distance and a sense of anonymity that breeds openness as well.
Things get shared that would not be or take a long time for them to in person.
Sooner or later though real life has to happen and you have to meet in person to know if it can be.
You need to see the spark in a persons eyes,hear the inflections in their voice to be sure the feelings are real.0 -
I have been in this situation and have done a few distance relationships as a result. At this point tho, given that the current girl is in Texas and I am in PA and how the distance relationships have turned out, I would rather keep it online and just enjoy each other because half of my distance relationships fizzled in person because we just didn't click. Downside of that is all the fun we had online or on the phone died with it. On the flip side, if you don't try, you could miss out on something great by never trying.
I guess what my rambling is saying is that you aren't alone lol.0 -
I would discuss with him the possibility of meeting, because no matter how well you get on via phone, texts, emails, etc., IMO you won' t really know if there is a true connection unless you meet in person.
This is my thought AND experience. I had a very good friend here on MFP for many months and we talked as friends on a variety of subjects, but we also flirted a lot with one another and eventually started kicking some 'what ifs' around. Long story short we finally met one another (we live in different states) and neither of us could be happier. :flowerforyou:0 -
Well first off thank GOD I am not the only one! Makes me feel like I am not crazy .. lol.
He lives in Louisiana .. lol. I am in New York. So I guess the idea of a relationship is out of the question. The funny thing is that he lives in a town that I lived in when I was in elementary school! lol.
I guess it is easy to romanticise it because he is not here and not picking up his socks .. so to speak. lol.
Thank you for putting it into perspective.
0 -
He lives in Louisiana .. lol. I am in New York. So I guess the idea of a relationship is out of the question.
Why? I mean, I agree that the odds aren't with ya, but if there is a connection (especially if/when you meet) then why not? It happens...though admittedly it's not everyone's cup of tea.0 -
I don't know, I guess I have never been in a long distance relationship and can't imagine that it would ever work. If he were maybe a few hours away that might be one thing I think .. but to be like a two day drive away ...
how far away are you and your MFP friend? Are you dating?0 -
I've never been in a true LDR and trust me, it's not something that I looked for, it's just something that came to be. Yes, we will be (are?) dating and we live states away from one another (for now.I don't know, I guess I have never been in a long distance relationship and can't imagine that it would ever work. If he were maybe a few hours away that might be one thing I think .. but to be like a two day drive away ...
how far away are you and your MFP friend? Are you dating?
). 0 -
It might be hard to make it work, but don't rule it out............0
-
You need to meet him in person. Then, and only then, can you decide if there is any physical chemistry. If there is, and he is the love of your life, and you his, then OMG go for it!! Distance is only a temporary obstacle!!
0 -
I look at life this way, I'd rather live a life of regrets and lessons learned than What ifs. Meet him take a chance, what's meant to be will be 0
-
Don't eat where you poop. Don't date people you work with.
Two rules to live by.0 -
Don't eat where you poop. Don't date people you work with.
Two rules to live by.
Agree with the first one :laugh:
But most people meet their partners through their work! I met my ex at work and we were together for 12 years
.
So you're theory is closing a lot of doors Mr Amisnercpa!! :bigsmile: Just dont date MARRIED people at work!!! :laugh:0 -
I would discuss with him the possibility of meeting, because no matter how well you get on via phone, texts, emails, etc., IMO you won' t really know if there is a true connection unless you meet in person.
This is my thought AND experience. I had a very good friend here on MFP for many months and we talked as friends on a variety of subjects, but we also flirted a lot with one another and eventually started kicking some 'what ifs' around. Long story short we finally met one another (we live in different states) and neither of us could be happier. :flowerforyou:
I agree with this! I have actually "dated" someone long distance without meeting for a long time and then once we met there really was no chemistry! Yes he was great to talk too! Yes he seemed perfect! Yes I thought he was HOT from his pictures!!! But NO CHEMISTRY! You need it!0 -
I agree with those that mentioned discussing the possibility of meeting. I did the long distance thing before and long story short, she had trust issues which made her back down from meeting and the whole thing just became one frustrating affair.0
-
I don't know if I could do the whole long distance thing .. it seems frustrating to me as well. Sigh. I think that I should back off a bit and see how I feel. Thanks so much for your input. 0
-
I'm curious to see how this turns out. I'm of the opinion that it's better to live and learn than to always wonder what may have been. Although I wouldn't actively seek a long distance relationship as it isn't ideal, if one happens to come along and I feel like she may be "the one", I'd take that risk.0
-
I'm curious to see how this turns out. I'm of the opinion that it's better to live and learn than to always wonder what may have been. Although I wouldn't actively seek a long distance relationship as it isn't ideal, if one happens to come along and I feel like she may be "the one", I'd take that risk.
Ditto. I agree with this guy ^^^0 -
If you are comparing other men to him, then he must really mean something special to you. I think you should meet and see where it goes.
You are definitely not alone. I fell in love with a co-worker long distance and finally got to meet him when he came in for business. We saw each other every few months and it was an amazing friendship. Had other things not been in the way, it would have worked out even with the distance.
I've also recently had a great friendship with someone I met online and wish we could have met up. But if distance is the only thing holding you back from this guy, you should meet each other.0
This discussion has been closed.