I can understand being nervous about going in for the assessment. However in the end whether it comes back that you are autistic or aren't it really doesn't change who you are. Even then assessments aren't all the same and don't catch everything, so they aren't 100% fool proof. My Son had 5 panel assessments, which they said something was different and needed to be further investigated. When he was old enough six months of weekly "in class" setting assessment before they determined autism. Even after that I still have had dealings with others in the health care profession who see him on "good" days and think it's a misdiagnosis. Keep in mind they aren't specialist and for all I know base their view on Rain Man.

So it is a big grey area. Though here is a black and white outlook

a) Assessment determines autism: You still are you you are only now you have a deeper insight as to why. Certain behaviours or situations in your past will make more sense. Errors and poor situations in the past can be improved or avoided using the new insight or what may have been the root of those events.

b) Assessment determines not autistic: You still are who you are, just not autistic. At that point you determine whether to seek further assessments into the possibility of autism or search other possible causes for what you are concered about. Perhaps in the end it all comes down to being a unique individual and not a "diagnosis".

It's only one assessment, so even though being nervous is understandable realize it may not be the end of what you're trying to determine.

Take Care

Hope you have met understanding at your assessments and that you are on the right path