My daughter told me I needed to change my answers because eHarmony only matched me with ugly men. And I mean UGLY. I didn't have any luck with Match either. Gave up on the online dating thing 2 years ago - huge waste of money. I think alot has to do with where you live though. I live in a small town.

When you're on Eharmony, they send you lots of matches the first month, but if you're on any longer than that it goes down to 2-3 a week. And basically no one ever writes or responds to one another (I've heard both men & women say this). It just feels pointless and expensive after a while.

*just copied my own answer from the other thread here too*

I personally did not like eHarm at all. I thought it was overpriced and I hardly had any matches in my area. You don't know who is an active member and who just signed up and isn't paying to communicate. The communication process was so slow... answer these five questions and get back to me and back and forth that way until you are allowed to communicate "live". It was a PIA. Towards the end there was this awesome guy in my area but my membership was ending and I wasn't going to renew for one dude.

I have had more dates off POF and at least there I know everyone on there is active or it tells you if they haven't logged in awhile. I just haven't met "the one" yet. haha

But there have been success stories off eHarm so maybe it will work for your friend!

I met one creepy guy on eharmony that thought we were destined to be together becase we were matched and from the same area. Just because of that doesn't mean we're gonna get married. we hadn't even met yet and he was saying oh I want to make you happy and all this other crap.
One other guy I met I could see a future with but he wasn't ready for a relationship. No idea why he was on there then if he wasn't ready.

I have had more dates off POF and at least there I know everyone on there is active or it tells you if they haven't logged in awhile.

I'm surprised it wouldn't let you do that... when I used to have a Match.com profile, it told you if someone was online in the last couple hours, days, weeks, or months. Which is why it cracked me up when guys would insist they'd disabled their profile, but I could see that they were online now.

Eharm does tell you when they were last online. It's under their name on the top left corner of their individual profile page - written very small though.

I have had more dates off POF and at least there I know everyone on there is active or it tells you if they haven't logged in awhile.

I'm surprised it wouldn't let you do that... when I used to have a Match.com profile, it told you if someone was online in the last couple hours, days, weeks, or months. Which is why it cracked me up when guys would insist they'd disabled their profile, but I could see that they were online now.

Eharm does tell you when they were last online. It's under their name on the top left corner of their individual profile page - written very small though.

Not on the app though

I met one creepy guy on eharmony that thought we were destined to be together becase we were matched and from the same area. Just because of that doesn't mean we're gonna get married. we hadn't even met yet and he was saying oh I want to make you happy and all this other crap.
One other guy I met I could see a future with but he wasn't ready for a relationship. No idea why he was on there then if he wasn't ready.

Interesting because a similar, but much less creepy thing happened to me too. I talked to one guy from eharmony and he texted so much that he made me feel like we were already in a relationship _before_ we even met. He was nice, but that was all. I had to tell him I wasn't really ready to move on after all just to get rid of him. Because of the way it's marketed, maybe people just assume they really are going to meet 'the one' on there, I don't know?

then he got pissed at me when I told him I didn't feel a connection when we met. I shut off my subsciption. No point in paying when you're not getting responses or messages from people.

Does eHarmony let you search for matches, or can you only reach out to the matches it sends you?

She's been online before (Chemistry) and was frustrated that there weren't many matches. I told her that when I was on Match.com I could search for (and reach out to) guys even if they weren't in the ones that the system matched to me. Just wondering if she'll be able to do that on eHarmony...?

you can only talk to the people they match you with

Why don't you suggest to your friend to try OKC or POF for a week first since they're free? Even if she's hell bent on eharmony, it can't hurt to cast her net over to pof or okc for a few days. I got about halfway through the sign up process for eharmony and gave up because of all the questions they make you answer before you even get a profile. I've been on match, pof, and okc though and see the same guys on all three sites!

eHarmony was, IMO, overpriced for the insane amount of hoops you jump through and the people are the same people you'll find on Snook.com, Match.com, etc.

At least with Match and Snook, you could browse the millions of people on the sites and chat with people who catch your attention.

In the end, it's all luck of the draw. Basically, I've started comparing dating online to odds of winning the PowerBall, and even the cost of that has gone up!

Yeah I am not happy with Eharmony either. I joined because I wanted to find someone that was in my area as I tend to end up in long distance relationships. I live in a metropolotian area so there should be a decent amount of matches in my opinion but it kept matching me with people in other states even though I put a 100 mile radius. The ones it has been matching me with I have nothing I can see in common so I don't have a clue how it is matching me with them. I went on one date from Eharmony within a couple weeks of me joining but other then that I haven't even wanted to give a guy an icebreaker. It has been a major disappointment. I think I have had a total of maybe 70 matches in half a year and 30 of those were in the first month.

If anyone has not been on it lately POF has become a pay site for certain features.

Same with OKC...but those features are mostly unnecessary, I think. Hmm..

The thing I found that annoyed me was if someone looked at your profile you can not see theirs without paying now.

That only lasted a few days..........I can use "viewed me" now, and I don't pay

If anyone has not been on it lately POF has become a pay site for certain features.

Same with OKC...but those features are mostly unnecessary, I think. Hmm..

The thing I found that annoyed me was if someone looked at your profile you can not see theirs without paying now.

That only lasted a few days..........I can use "viewed me" now, and I don't pay

I can see who viewed me but it won`t take me to their profile without upgrading (paying).

If anyone has not been on it lately POF has become a pay site for certain features.

Same with OKC...but those features are mostly unnecessary, I think. Hmm..

The thing I found that annoyed me was if someone looked at your profile you can not see theirs without paying now.

That only lasted a few days..........I can use "viewed me" now, and I don't pay

I can see who viewed me but it won`t take me to their profile without upgrading (paying).

I just joined yesterday and I have been able to see all profiles of people that viewed me.

I havent had to pay to see their profile....I did have it come up once, but then didn't happen again

Does eHarmony let you search for matches, or can you only reach out to the matches it sends you?

She's been online before (Chemistry) and was frustrated that there weren't many matches. I told her that when I was on Match.com I could search for (and reach out to) guys even if they weren't in the ones that the system matched to me. Just wondering if she'll be able to do that on eHarmony...?

No! You get matched by a system of questions! I never had so many mismatches in my life :laugh:

I dont really believe in phsychometric testing anyhow. We are far too complex to be simplified in 50 questions.

I met one guy, and left, but you know, it might be me!! I'm just more of a 'gut' and personality person, rather than a 'you have the same education as me, work similar hours, have the same faith, like music and like football, so therefore we are a good match' person...........lol Perhaps I go more for opposites?? Hmmm!!

Anyway, not for me, but I'm sure it works for some people :flowerforyou: