help! first date in a new town
abc_life
Posts: 28
So I went on a date with this friend of a friend..hes not terrible cute but not ugly either...we had fun..went to a spring training game and I laughed a lot but in the back of my mind I kept thinking " man I miss my friends back east..iwish kw as with them and not this dude" iknkw its not polite but I was staringat way hotter guys too..I mean I guessimnot ready to date date. Ive had a rough 2 years w guys so I'm really stand offish when I give them a chance
I guess what I'm asking is, should I try to give him a another chance even though I'm jot attracted to him?
I guess what I'm asking is, should I try to give him a another chance even though I'm jot attracted to him?
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Replies
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A pity date?
Or a free meal/event?
Or better than Netflix?
No, don't settle. But I'm sure I'm a minority on this one.0 -
Well when I got home he text me "hey I had a lot of fun. Let meknow when you have a night off from work" and I didn't respond bc I went to bed. I woke up to a text from him "can I ask you a question?" Again I didn't respond bc I woke up at 4am and I'm sure he is sleeping..I'm almost positive hes going to ask if I think hes attractive or something
Ugh dating can go blow itself bc there's Jo action coming from this girl lol0 -
I would tell him somthing like:
"I had a good time but I since I just moved here I am still missing home and I don't think I am ready to date here yet."0 -
The last 2 times I've moved, I've had dates by the 2nd night in a new city. Moving to a new city is a great opportunity.
If you're not attracted, you're not attracted. You would have gone out with one of those hotter guys you were staring at during the game if you had the chance.
Where in the East are you from? Probably a better place than Arizona.0 -
No, don't settle. But I'm sure I'm a minority on this one.
^^^ this!! If you aint feeling it, and you're checking out other guys, I'd say this one is not the one for you :flowerforyou:
You're never in the minority Amisnercpa!!
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I came from Pennsylvania. I like it here and this isn't my first move (ive moved over 9 times since age 5) but Arizona is nice and full of men but NOBODY talks to me..Im still adjusting since ive only been here 3 months0
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If you don`t feel anything be fair to him and yourself.
If he asks again just politely decline,if he wants to hang out as a friend be clear that is your intentions and don`t let him treat it as a date working towards a relationship.0 -
I'm not jumping on you by any means but why do people even ask themselves this? You're the only one that should answer.
Why would you date someone you're not physically attracted to?? (one day you'll have to have sex with this person)
Why would you date someone you're not into?
I understand chemistry and attraction can grow as time goes by but there has to be some attraction, I know you said he's not ugly or what not, but if you're not attracted to him, do him a favor and let him find someone who is.
As for you, like everyone said, don't settle.
This is my motto for dating this time around and so far I've stuck to it. If I get into a serious relationship it will be because he rocked me in every.single.way.
That means in MY eyes, he's hot, smart, sexy, funny, adventurous, keeps me on my toes, and drives me crazy in all the right ways.
If I don't feel potential (and so far I haven't with the guys I've dated), I next them. Simple. No need to waste my time or theirs.
Keep going girly!0 -
I'm not jumping on you by any means but why do people even ask themselves this? You're the only one that should answer.
Why would you date someone you're not physically attracted to?? (one day you'll have to have sex with this person)
Why would you date someone you're not into?
I agree with you, but I think lorro was the one who said on a thread last week that women instinctively want to give people the benefit of the doubt, take care of someone and avoid hurting them. Deep down, we already know the answer, but we still ask the question anyway to avoid feeling like the bad person in the situation.
p.s. Thanks lorro - can you tell you gave me a lot to think about!?0 -
READ BAGGAGE RECLAIM women!!
Maybe I'm just a biaaatch... or am in a selfish ME phase right now.
It's simple. If I'm not into you, I'll move on and if you're not treating me as a priority than I won't treat you as one either.
Even as strong as I feel for the FL, I have never treated him like a bf or given him benefits that aren't entitled to him (such as cooking for him, gifts, etc). I only give him what he gives me.0 -
READ BAGGAGE RECLAIM women!!
Maybe I'm just a biaaatch... or am in a selfish ME phase right now.
It's simple. If I'm not into you, I'll move on and if you're not treating me as a priority than I won't treat you as one either.
Even as strong as I feel for the FL, I have never treated him like a bf or given him benefits that aren't entitled to him (such as cooking for him, gifts, etc). I only give him what he gives me.
I did look up that site when you mentioned it last week. The article on how to tell if a guy is an assclown ... so on target that I almost wanted to cry. Women need to read that, memorize it, and apply it.0 -
I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.0 -
I would tell him somthing like:
"I had a good time but I since I just moved here I am still missing home and I don't think I am ready to date here yet."0 -
I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.
Or what about men who try to please idiotic girls?
It's a two way street, share the blame. Don't point the finger in one direction only.
Now, on topic so I don't get another freakin' warning from these retarded moderators....
Don't go on another date with him out of pitty. Just tell him you're not interested. No point in wasting his time or yours.0 -
You didn't respond to two of his texts - I'm gonna say it, I think it's kinda rude. At this juncture I think you owe it to him to reply that you had a nice time, but aren't interested in going out again. Honesty trumps games every. single. time.0
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I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.
Or what about men who try to please idiotic girls?
It's a two way street, share the blame. Don't point the finger in one direction only.
I completely agree but I'm a woman so I can only speak for women.
I wasn't pointing a finger. I was speaking specifically about this blog that is directed towards women. If you want, find a blog that is for men about idiotic girls and share that with the men here. Thanks. :flowerforyou:0 -
You didn't respond to two of his texts - I'm gonna say it, I think it's kinda rude. At this juncture I think you owe it to him to reply that you had a nice time, but aren't interested in going out again. Honesty trumps games every. single. time.
I agree. Give HIM a second chance? Sounds more like he should be questioning whether or not to give YOU a second chance, considering you spent the whole time thinking about how "not terribly cute" he was and staring at other men. It's clear you are not into him, so the biggest favor you can do him is tell him thanks, but no thanks.0 -
Thanks you all..first though he had tdtvke while ibwas sleeping hence not replying...second I was very nice and polite during the date..I'm not going to be a ***** to his face
I think I know what to do and that is to be honest and move on..there's better things for me to worry about then a guy right now0 -
I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.
Or what about men who try to please idiotic girls?
It's a two way street, share the blame. Don't point the finger in one direction only.
I completely agree but I'm a woman so I can only speak for women.
I wasn't pointing a finger. I was speaking specifically about this blog that is directed towards women. If you want, find a blog that is for men about idiotic girls and share that with the men here. Thanks. :flowerforyou:
This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship
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I'm not jumping on you by any means but why do people even ask themselves this? You're the only one that should answer.
Why would you date someone you're not physically attracted to?? (one day you'll have to have sex with this person)
Why would you date someone you're not into?
I agree with you, but I think lorro was the one who said on a thread last week that women instinctively want to give people the benefit of the doubt, take care of someone and avoid hurting them. Deep down, we already know the answer, but we still ask the question anyway to avoid feeling like the bad person in the situation.
p.s. Thanks lorro - can you tell you gave me a lot to think about!?
I can! Thanks PJ, that's really sweet :flowerforyou:0 -
I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.
Or what about men who try to please idiotic girls?
It's a two way street, share the blame. Don't point the finger in one direction only.
I completely agree but I'm a woman so I can only speak for women.
I wasn't pointing a finger. I was speaking specifically about this blog that is directed towards women. If you want, find a blog that is for men about idiotic girls and share that with the men here. Thanks. :flowerforyou:
This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I like you too. 0 -
Music to my ears.I can't say enough good things about that site. Baggage reclaim and P90x are the ones that helped me decide to leave my ex. haha
And men, it doesn't bash you.. it just tries to help us women stop this madness of trying to please idiots that don't deserve us. It really focuses on knowing your worth as a woman and if you're not treated with love and respect in the relationship, then it's not a healthy one.
Awesome stuff.
Sorry OP, don't mean to take over your thread. :flowerforyou: I just don't think you should settle.
Or what about men who try to please idiotic girls?
It's a two way street, share the blame. Don't point the finger in one direction only.
I completely agree but I'm a woman so I can only speak for women.
I wasn't pointing a finger. I was speaking specifically about this blog that is directed towards women. If you want, find a blog that is for men about idiotic girls and share that with the men here. Thanks. :flowerforyou:
This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I like you too.0
