could use some encouragement...
skinnimarink
Posts: 5 Member
I have successfully lost 17 lbs since January 1st of this year, and then I found out a whole lot of terrible **** about my family, and that I have uterine cancer, and everything has just fallen apart.
The only way I have been able to deal with it is by eating everything in sight. I have to actually ruin food in order to not eat everything there so that I don't make myself sick from eating too much. I have been missing work so I can stay home and eat. I am a wreck.
I have a therapy appointment tomorrow night, but I just ate a whole order of pad thai, a giant sourdough roll, a popsicle, a piece of toast, caramel popcorn, and half a bar of chocolate. Oh, and a chicken drumstick. And I just couldn't wait until then...I needed to reach out.
Thank you, even if you don't respond or read this whole thing, for just being out there in a forum where I am able to vent like this. Just this amount of honesty has helped.
The only way I have been able to deal with it is by eating everything in sight. I have to actually ruin food in order to not eat everything there so that I don't make myself sick from eating too much. I have been missing work so I can stay home and eat. I am a wreck.
I have a therapy appointment tomorrow night, but I just ate a whole order of pad thai, a giant sourdough roll, a popsicle, a piece of toast, caramel popcorn, and half a bar of chocolate. Oh, and a chicken drumstick. And I just couldn't wait until then...I needed to reach out.
Thank you, even if you don't respond or read this whole thing, for just being out there in a forum where I am able to vent like this. Just this amount of honesty has helped.
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Wow.... sounds like life is slapping you in the face pretty hard. I hope the cancer is treatable... I can't imagine how scary that must be.
The only thing I can think of to say is, just take it one day at a time. If you fall down today, it's no big deal. Perfection is not required. Just wake up tomorrow and try again. Go to bed tonight and tell yourself you'll try to follow whatever regimen you've picked for yourself. Wake up tomorrow and remind yourself of your goal. Then try to make it through the day.
One day at a time. Best wishes!0 -
I agree with opus649. Don't be hard on yourself. Like any journey (and weight loss/getting in shape is definitely one) there are ups and downs. I am a track coach and even training high school throwers, they have down days. I always tell them to look at the little things they have done well and accomplished. Celebrate every accomplishment. I celebrate when I don't eat something that I wanted when I want to binge. Or for example, the other day, my family wanted burgers at this little burger stand and I celebrated that I had enough control to take off half of the bun. Not a big deal to some, but for me it is a step in the right direction. So my piece of advice is to celebrate even the smallest of victories.
You are dealing with some major issues. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.0 -
I'm sorry for your struggles and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Your post makes me realize that my problems are not so big.0
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One of my favorite sayings is "No Grit. No Pearl."
That aside, I know what it is like to feel like the world is crumbling around you and not know what to do. I am sorry to hear things are so hard right now but I don't think you can really get off this planet without living through something that knocks you to your knees.
But here is the good news: You can survive this. You will survive this if you choose to. And you will be the better for it if you choose to.
I just ate and drank my way up the scale and now that the depression has passed I do see the light at the end of the tunnel and I can tell you that there is a way out of the pain that doesn't include a bag of chips, a box of donuts or the best hot buttered rum this side of the sun.
You can rise up after all is said and done no matter what life knocks your way.
No Grit. No Pearl.0 -
Beautiful and true!
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I am so sorry about your diagnosis. Maybe you should not go hardcore, but enjoy your comfort foods in a reasonable serving and focus on logging even if you go over. You are in control, remember that.0
