critique my online dating profile
Vodkha
Posts: 352 Member
I get messages, but not very often. I have no problems messaging guys first, but I don't always get a response. If I do it is short and it kills it for me. Is it something in my write up? Is it my pics I have up? Is it that I have 'a few extra pounds' listed as my body type? It has to be something!
I have in my profile I am seeking a relationship, but in my actual write up it says friends first. I think it is difficult to enter into a relationship with someone if you don't know them as a friend first.
"I am a quirky, down to earth girl with a good, if not perverted sense of humor. I'm fairly witty and sarcastic. Beneath the sarcasm, I am loyal and I have a huge heart.
I like animals, camping, movies, the gym, walking my dogs, yoga, and photography. There are lots of things in life I'd still like to do and see. I like alternative rock and I rarely miss a UFC event. I like to play Xbox, but I'm not very good yet. I am interested in what is going on in the world and I like documentaries and foreign movies. I drink socially, and do not do drugs. I try to work out daily, and usually manage to do so. I am getting very involved in working out and nutrition. I really like lifting weights and kettlebells and I enjoy getting outside for different activities, too so if you like the outdoors or like being active, that's great.
I appreciate kindness and sense of humor above all else. I like a man to be a man and like someone who is straight forward and doesn't go along with anything I say. I think it is important to be friends first as trust and honesty are most important. I am not into someone who does drugs, sorry. That being said, I'm not a prude and I am very open-minded in all aspects
If I send you a message and I am not your type, I think a reply message letting me know that would be nice. I will do the same for you.
I am just looking for friends at this point and if something comes from that, great. "
I have in my profile I am seeking a relationship, but in my actual write up it says friends first. I think it is difficult to enter into a relationship with someone if you don't know them as a friend first.
"I am a quirky, down to earth girl with a good, if not perverted sense of humor. I'm fairly witty and sarcastic. Beneath the sarcasm, I am loyal and I have a huge heart.
I like animals, camping, movies, the gym, walking my dogs, yoga, and photography. There are lots of things in life I'd still like to do and see. I like alternative rock and I rarely miss a UFC event. I like to play Xbox, but I'm not very good yet. I am interested in what is going on in the world and I like documentaries and foreign movies. I drink socially, and do not do drugs. I try to work out daily, and usually manage to do so. I am getting very involved in working out and nutrition. I really like lifting weights and kettlebells and I enjoy getting outside for different activities, too so if you like the outdoors or like being active, that's great.
I appreciate kindness and sense of humor above all else. I like a man to be a man and like someone who is straight forward and doesn't go along with anything I say. I think it is important to be friends first as trust and honesty are most important. I am not into someone who does drugs, sorry. That being said, I'm not a prude and I am very open-minded in all aspects
If I send you a message and I am not your type, I think a reply message letting me know that would be nice. I will do the same for you.
I am just looking for friends at this point and if something comes from that, great. "
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Replies
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Didn't you have like 600+ messages in your inbox? Or is this a different profile/site?0
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uh, totally different person you must be thinking of lol.0
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You are right. I did and I apologize for that.
In reading your profile, I can't see anything that would prevent a response. I can tell you that most of the messages I used to get from women on dating sites were spam. Beyond that, I don't know what else it could be besides the pictures.0 -
If you figure it out, let me know too. I've only been on 3 weeks but have NEVER heard back from about 65 guys that I've messaged or winked. I have only gotten 5 winks and one message. The one message stood me up for a phone call, and I never heard from him again. None of the winks responded to my message (of the 3 I responded to, so I'm guessing they are not members of Match.com I believe).
I too am listed as "A few extra pounds" so of course my natural inclination is to blame my weight. I've had several people review my profile and all tell me the same thing (guys and girls), it looks fine, give it some time... which sounds great, but this is even less interaction than even I figured I'd see...
I literally got into my car last week after getting stood up thinking, "OMG, it could be like this for the net 10 weeks of my paid membership" Maybe I'm just not cut out for online dating.... BUtT I wish you Good Luck!0 -
I hate online dating. Your profile is well written, and sounds good. But I've heard from men that the listed "deal breakers" (I am not into someone who does drugs), are very off putting and come off as stuck up or negative. I know I had a few of them.
But the picture is the most important part and has to be an eye catcher. That's just the world that we live in.0 -
Most women white they love sports, spontaneous, fun, sarcastic, intelligent, dancing, classy, ambitious, new in town, just looking, hates drama, laid back, wants a man who is 4 feet taller than them and in shape, loves video games, they are not uptight, loves good music and movies, loves the outdoors, can get dirty but can dress up, like going watching games, and wants the man to plan everything out. It seems to work for them even though most of it is not true, its usually the opposite. I swear, I think most just write what we want to find instead of who they really are.
Ok, this is what I would do, leave off the trust and friends thing, it sounds like you have had some trust issues in the past or that it will be hard to earn your trust, or you just want a guy to take you out and wine and dine and never be intimate. Guys dont like going out with women who are not looking for something other than friends. Men like women, its that simple, we are attracted to women and do want to play, its what women have to offer than makes us stay after playtime.
Trust should always be there until someone has broken trust and not have to work for it. It sounds alot of work and not something that makes you sound like fun. You want your profile to sound like you are a cool, fun, laid back women who is wanting to meet someone and whatever happens, happens wether its end up as friends or more. Time will tell.
Also be careful of the sarcastic thing too, 99 percent of women put that on their profiles and it usually means that they are itchy and likes to put people down. Its a turnoff. Its simple, guys like to find a intelligent, fun, that has commonality, respectful, positive, nice, laid back women who doesnt spend the whole date on her phone that maybe that we can build somethign with wethier its a relationship or just physical. Men and women are so different, its hard to just be friends, there just isnt alot in common for it too work so when we do find one that we can actually talk to and have fun, we like to build on it.
Write about you that is truely you and sell your self and make it different than every other chicks profile that is on there. You seem like an amazing woman who has alot to offer, sell it girl. Not sure if my ramblings help, ive been drinking for hours now.0 -
I would get rid of the just friends line and instead say something like: "I'd like to take time to learn about a great guy with whom I can develop a great friendship and romantic relationship" or "a great friendship that builds into a romantic relationship". Your profile sounds like you don't want a hook up or a relationship.
I also think your second paragraph is too long and packs too much information in a sporadic and random manner. Instead of saying all the things you like maybe figure out what you want from a guy and tailor a description of things you do that would fit into that type. For example if the gym/fitness/nutrition is the biggest thing say something like:
I have become very active active lately. I am learning about nutrition and exercise. I really love the feeling after a great workout using kettlebells and free weights. I also love all the improvements I am seeing to my body as a result of the exercise and healthier eating.
Just my two cents.0 -
We need to see the pictures!!!
The "few extra pounds" shouldn't be a problem. Guys are attracted to all different sizes and shapes. I used to have the extra pounds and now that I've put my profile back up I put "average". I don't know?!? I hate that question..
I did however include body shots and in my "about me" section I put how I'm 5'8, size 12. Whatever.
I've gotten guys I'm not interested in and I've passively aggressively used the Meet Me feature to see if they'd bite the bait. Some did, some didn't.
I have been talking to 1 guy who seems nice and is cute. I think it just takes 1 but both have to be interested.
There are so many women.. so many men on there.. we probably get lost in the clutter sometimes.0 -
here is my POF profile...
i have nothing to hide so what the hell. i get compliments on the way i wrote it. i wanted my personality to show and i think it does.
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=410814660 -
Yeah, if I read a guy's profile and he says he just wants to be friends first, I move on.
Works both ways.
It's a dating site. Not a friends site :flowerforyou:0 -
Yeah, if I read a guy's profile and he says he just wants to be friends, I move on.
Works both ways.
It's a dating site. Not a friends site :flowerforyou:
I so agree with this. So many people dont get it, its a dating site.0 -
here is my POF profile...
i have nothing to hide so what the hell. i get compliments on the way i wrote it. i wanted my personality to show and i think it does.
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=41081466
I like the way you did a "25 things" kinda list!0 -
thanks.. i was going to say the same thing about being friends first. relationships ARE built on trust and all that jazz.. that's why you're heading towards a relationship with that person (if you didn't trust them somewhat, you wouldn't).
i think you should take that part out. once you start talking to a guy, you can explain it to him.
I automatically ignore any friendships, casual dating, etc... sure, maybe one of my dates will be a friendship or just end up a couple of casual dates but in the long run, i want a relationship. once i start chatting with someone, i tell them what i'm looking for.0
