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Day 10 - Compliments

Fattack
Fattack Posts: 666 Member
in Social Groups
Hello everyone! Sorry the challenges are late and the spreadsheet isn't available yet - as many of you know I'm technically on holiday at the moment (sister visiting from UK) so it's all a bit busy.

How many times do you get complimented on things (including losses) to respond in a negative way? Learn to respond warmly to compliments about my progress and not to minimize their words by clarifying statements (e.g. "I still have a lot to lose", "My bum is still too big"). This way you are affirming the statement and appreciating the other person too!

Also - don't ask leading questions, they're unfair to the other person! (Leading questions are ones that invite an answer that may not be honest such as "Do I look fat in this dress?" / "Do I look thinner?") etc.

Today's tasks:

1. Ask a friend or family member for a compliment - on anything
2. Respond in a way that affirms the person who gave you the compliment
3. Record your favourite responses here!

Replies

  • fionat29
    fionat29 Posts: 717 Member
    This is a tough one, but after some thought and a deep breath I asked my husband if he thought I was doing ok with my diet.
    He said I looked amazing and that he loved my muscles. (Thank you Tony Horton and P90X)
    I told him I loved him too!! A total love fest Lol!!
    To give him his due, he has always said lovely things about me even when I was much bigger. He's just lovely!!
  • FTIM2015
    FTIM2015 Posts: 460 Member
    I told James (OH) that I'd cycled to work, then willingly taken the long route back in the pouring rain and cold. He said that it was great that I was so motivated to get off my *kitten* and do stuff (believe me it's because of him!).

    I told him that it's only since meeting him, and knowing how much hard work he put in to get where he is (he lost over 4st a few yrs ago post chemo), that has given me the drive to do what I'm doing!
  • kimannabella
    kimannabella Posts: 31 Member
    A few days ago I visited my grandparents, who said I looked well (unprompted) and I was able to respond to it with a thank you, I have been back working out. I am good with receiving compliments, just not so good at taking them in internally,which I suppose is where it matters (in my head i was saying "working out, BUT-not at the level that i used to be able for".
  • knkmfp
    knkmfp Posts: 295 Member
    No-one else here to ask for a compliment today, but a colleague did comment on my weight loss yesterday. I always find it hard to now what to say, and think the advice to use it to recognise the person giving the compliment is a good one. I've decided I'll just say something like 'Thank you, it's kind of you to say so'.
  • MamaDee2
    MamaDee2 Posts: 843 Member
    The other day saw someone I have not seen in awhile, she said I looked great. I just said thank you very much.
  • Bola17
    Bola17 Posts: 120 Member
    This one is so needed. I met a woman I haven´t seen in about a year and she said "oh I wasn´t sure it was you - haven´t you lost weight?" And I said maybe. So I went around the rest of the day wondering why I didn´t just say yes or something more affirming.

    I guess I reached the conclusion that I
    1. have a hard time with compliments
    2. haven´t told alot of people about my new life style (my family knows and a few of my closest collegues
    and 3. have to admit that I needed a change in my life style because of weight, stress and our family problems and this probably is the hardest!
    So I´m working on it. Even though I have mentally accepted these things, I´m not really ready to talk about them. But I do like knkmfp strategi of a pre decided strategi.

    So from now on I will reply " Yes I have and thank you for the compliment."

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