ThatFatAsianNerd Member

Tyson Beckford's stunt double.

Getting old, definitely. My former roommate and his new wife and I just walked by this place to get to some coffee shop.

No words needed here. How about when you first start hanging out with a girl and the first time you both go to the gym together, she's on that one treadmill the entire 2 hours staring at your every move. Makes you feel like some prisoner being watched by a prison guard from a tower equipped with a sniper rifle.

Add compliment/complement to you're/your, their/they're/there, etc. Although compliment/complement can still work in its own way in some cases.

See, I think you missed an opportunity there. You dance with an "older" lady at somebody's wedding or some occasion like that, you'll probably be waking up next to one of the bridesmaids or some other guest at that same event on the very next morning. Then again, NYEvents are different.

"I was thinking about having you meet my folks next weekend." Nonchalantly get up off of her couch, walk and whistle with your hands in your pockets straight into her kitchen, grab a Popsicle or something, slip out the back, put your car on neutral, push halfway down the street, get in, start it up, floor it, then blast…

"I swear, I won't be mad. Which one of my friends would you bang if you had the chance? Be honest." (Ladies, whatever he says, the real answer is always going to be the one you do NOT want him to say. LOL!)

Please, it's only "creepy" if it's some slob with marinara stains on his Atari shirt comes up to you with chunks of last night's anchovies and sausage lodged from in between his teeth are finally flying straight into your face like missile projectiles. Ranch dressing drippin' down the side of his lips and all. But if it's…

Honestly guys/gals, this is the only way I get digits: http://youtu.be/rUx48IBqz2k

Fugazi - Waiting Room

LAX finally getting direct round trip flights to Cuba. 'Bout damn time. Gotta jump through hoops/meet certain conditions and shyt but nothing one can't manage if he or she really wants it bad enough.

Can you stop putting up Glenn for every Asian guy and put up someone like this big crazy mofo or something? Lol.

How does one get hit on by women because every time I do it, I end up waking up counting stars and birds and the last thing I usually remember is someone grabbing a baseball bat.

"Rooster" shot sent. Ladies, get your magnifying glasses out.

By women? I don't think so. By gay guys, all the time. Like, they're pretty f*****-ng vocal about it too. Lol.

Since I've joined MFP, I've given up on reading books. I just tear up phone books with my bare hands. Books r 4 losers!

Not sure if I'm fat (204 lbs., 15%) anymore but I'm like undercover geekazoid. Like I'm about to go lift right now (near 6AM) while listening to the WoW or LOTR theme. Haha!

Great job!

Is on a horse and has just put on her iron helmet, about to joust? Wait, this is Medieval Times. No wonder I'm in tights! ::: grabs random peasant's turkey leg ::: Gimme that!

"Yes, that Tijuana tale is real."

It'll be our own secret getaway. We're just gonna wing it on our first night there. Wake up at 3am. Rent some clunky old Royal Enfield Bullet and ride through the busy streets of Marrakesh and maybe even stop for a few minutes to eat some authentic shish kabob made by some sweaty, chain-smoking Moroccan man who'll…

Underwater marriage. Here. Sign this life insurance policy, put on this scuba gear and strap this oxygen tank on yourself. Oh don't worry about these. These aren't dynamite. They're fireworks to celebrate our wedding.

http://youtu.be/JloGJhhF2ss

Whether to just lay here in bed or go back to that little fitness room dressed like Tatanka. Just run in there real loud and jump over people doing floor exercises like this guy:

Are you guys hiring for part-time/substitute/assistant coach/marching band coordinator/your secret sex slave in the maintenance office/ groundskeeper/ or even a cafeteria lady? I wanna work with you.

Someone gave me some ecstasy and this is why I'm massaging your manly back with a pacifier in my mouth.

Sure, why not. I'm challenging you to an innertube race down the river, Chuck Norris.