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While we were going through the worst of it, I told him repeatedly that it was emotional/mental abuse and it was unhealthy. He made me feel like I was nuts. He can switch to what I call "playing the victim" so quickly and then says things that make me feel bad and he gets me everytime. :(
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I feel like it's controlling - and unhealthy. Unhealthy for both of us to live with and for the kids to see/hear. When I said something about going out with friends, he [naturally] assumed I meant out "clubbing" or something and got mad. That is totally NOT what I meant. I meant like one of those paint / wine things or out…
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He's a little over 6', athletic build, handsome. I don't understand why he has issues with insecurity. He's definitely good looking!
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I appreciate the honesty. Things have been getting slowly a little better between us, but I always wonder when the next big blow out is going to happen. :(
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No, I know exactly what you mean - and thank you. I don't think he's a bad guy at all. I love him dearly. I just think he does have issues with control, self-esteem, trust, insecurity, and all of that. That's pretty much what I keep doing. When he buys me treats he knows I won't refuse, I bring them to work and ration them…
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I've told him exactly that - that I'm doing it for ME. And I've told him that he has trust issues and that he is too controlling. We've been together 10 years [married 6] and only recently has this become as big an issue as it is. He acts like I'm nuts when I say that he's being controlling. It's just so... ughhh. :(
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I do get angry about it. Which sparks heated arguments. For a while we were literally arguing non-stop daily. I think I get what he's thinking, but it still isn't right or okay. I think he thinks that if he 'loves' the way I look, then I should too. Then he proceeds to think that if he 'loves' the way I look, and I am…
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I would say yes. (He would say no.) That's been the major issue we've had as of late. It's usually subtle. Getting mad if I do my hair without a "good" reason. Getting mad when I say I want [and should be able to] go and do things with friends and/or family...
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I have asked him those questions directly - his answer is always "As long as I'm happy with your body, I don't see why you need or want to change it." @courtneyfabulous & @RoxieDawn - thank you. I've suggested individual and/or marriage counseling - he said "No way. Never going to happen." :disappointed: I continue on with…
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Thank you. That's how I thought it worked - or how I thought it should work. He has had some issues with control - hence the marital issues. I tell him all the time, it's for my happiness - not to please anyone else or care about their opinion(s). Thanks again!