kam26001 Member

One midget from the region of Provence. Simmered to absolute perfection. 👌

Pisces, but my starchild is orbiting Jupiter as I compute. What this means is I have finally reached the last dimension of ascension... and we will no longer be in communication until Gaia. Hide all the cookies.

I never get the combo meal, just the sandwich. Stick it to the Man! I also have this really fancy bottle of Cognac that looks like something the Pope would guzzle from and I fill it up with some Boone's Farm (or whatever cheap stuff I can find at Kroger's on a Saturday night). The type of women I date can't tell the…

This is embarrassing but I got the hots for the Zumba instructor at my gym. I think her name is Jada or Lana. Some days she wears a tutu and chunky white sneakers--- whew. I wish I had the courage to sign up for one of her infamous conga line classes, but stiff hips run in the family.

I'm scared to google this. Last time I googled one of y'all's little dealbreakers, it ended up describing me to a T. I think the word was sycophant... or psychopath.... something like that. So from now on, I'm good. 🤸

I used to have a bedtime mix on my iPod Shuffle and one time I woke up in the middle of the night to this track (because the iPod Shuffle just keeps playing until the battery dies) and honest to god, I thought I was in the afterlife. And for those few seconds I never felt so scared yet so free at the same time. Now I kinda…

I hate it when people (usually a millennial wearing J. Crew) use a fancy word where it's really not needed. Hey, what's up? Not much. Just been docile all day. Wtf? Did your cardigan come with a thesaurus? Dork.

I had to go to a funeral this one time (I know right, what an inconvenience) and afterward there was a backyard cookout type thing. I went up to the BBQ pitmaster with my buns and garnishes meticulously laid out and politely asked for a burger. I guess I always say please whenever I ask for anything because a relative who…

If she has more than 2 eyebrows, that usually kills it for me.

A former hopscotch champion with arthritic knees who tells me to go chase my dreams.

https://youtu.be/Z0e2G32f3IU

Welcome aboard and congrats on the 32 lb loss.

Welcome!

Welcome, Patricia.

I see your Kurt Warner and raise you Jeff Garcia.

OP's avatar is relationship goals. 👌

I remember back when I was a teenager (damn that's depressing to say) I had a friend whose mom would dress really snazzy and I dug her style. One day I'm over at his house sitting at the kitchen table waiting for him to get ready and his mom comes home from work decked out in a snappy ensemble, as per usual. I said to her,…

There's these ladies in the office... every time one or the other buys some new shoes I have to overhear this conversation: (they bump into each other rounding the corner) OMG I love your shoes! Thank you! They were having a 30% off sale at (insert giant store that sells mass produced shoes). OMG I saw that when I was…

I tried the Beyond Burger at Carl's Jr. It was delicious, but it also had a slice of cheese and lots of mayo and secret sauce. How do you vegans dress yours up? I was thinking maybe some BBQ sauce and mushrooms.

A bohemian girl with bushy eyebrows and a collection of funky sandals.

I'm sure some rapper will make a song about Remy Martin soon enough and it'll be a huge hit in the clubs/IG stories. In fact, there IS a rapper named Remy Martin... so there ya go.

Moronic Drivers, USA

His world famous chili

McDonald's fries, especially the soggy ones.

https://youtu.be/7H0s1yiqn1A

Plutonium

Maybe she plays the devil's advocate just to keep the conversation juicy. Otherwise she's that friend agreeing with everything you say while scrolling through her phone and making you feel like you're talking too much. I hate when you open up to a friend and lay something heavy on them and all they got for you is a "mm…

I don't use a diary but every day I have brown rice ramen with 150 cals of tofu. You can find these individual packs of ramen at Whole Foods or Walmart in the Asian section. They come with a seasoning packet and the sodium isn't too bad (700mg but I only use half and it suits my taste just fine). The tofu bumps up the…

Talk about an all-star cast. Even Tony Danza is in this.

Lol. As a joke... or? Wait, don't answer that.