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You sound somewhat like my fiance. He used to be a bigger guy before I met him, and he was beaten by his step dad and cussed out and yelled at all the time at home by his family. He always has it in his head somehow he's going to loose me, and hes actually cried over it a few times before. All I can really do is reassure…
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128 ish, but id be okay at 140, im 218 now.