srv524 Member

She kept stealing my Cheez-its

She bought me latex even though she knew I had a latex allergy

I got an erection every time she smiled, it made for awkward Christmas family photos

With the optional ballgag

I didn't mean it to come off like that. First, my girlfriend and I have joint "married" accounts so buying a gift would be taking away from that pot when it's tight as it is. Second, we mutual hate this holiday since we feel it's just a made-up money holiday. We both show our love for each other every day so we feel that…

I didn't care

She insisted on only using 1 hand so I had to take matters into my own hands.

You both look great and very dedicated. I work out 3x a week, hoping to bump it up to 4x now that I only have 1 job. I do mostly weight lifting intervals, some running, but need to get back to running more and training for 5K's. I dropped 30 lbs, put 12 back on, looking to drop the final 20-30 lbs.

Never knew what to do with it

Sexual favors, DUH.

She put soap in my mouth all the time for say "f-u-c-k" in bed

Kept sticking my head in the toilet!

Kept crapping on the bed

She wanted me to put a collar and leash on her and walk her around the neighborhood

He slept with the dog

Asked my dog to be her valentine...awkward.

Vday is stupid for us. If you need a separate day to love your SO more than the other days, your relationship/marriage is going to fail. We love each other the same each year and we know it's a *kitten*, made-up corporate holiday that only idiots fall for. That being said - we have joint money accounts so it would be…

I only gnawed....nm :)

She liked being tied up....with rusty chains.

Wanted me to be the slave...ha!

Didn't like marshmellow Peeps

Lied about her bra size :(

Kept calling out "oh god!" in her sleep and told me she was praying. She was an athiest!

He kept eating all of my typing paper and envelopes

She liked being told what to do

Whenever I need a good cry

She kept referring to me as a horse...I think she meant horse c-o-c-k

Kept snapping my Erector set in half...bad nightmares ensued.

Well even though you're Canadian I'll still wish you good luck. I dropped 30 lbs, put 12 back on, looking to drop another 30 or so (so I guess 60 total :smile: ) Feel free to add but be diligent and strict with your tracking calories and activities. Good luck to you!

He kept stealing my Lincoln Logs