Update on my Match adventures
Jennifer10723
Posts: 374 Member
I have 13 days left on my Match subscription. Definitely NOT renewing. I have had a few men email me .. but most of them are honestly too far away. I have had two that were about 55 minutes away .. which I could deal with. We exchanged numbers and then poof .. they were gone. One got really sexual really fast .. like before we even spoke on the phone and when I didn't play along he disappeared. The other one .. he would text me sporadically and then just stopped.
There was a super cute one that I winked at and was shocked that he responded to me .. we messaged on the site for a couple days and then one day he didn't answer me back, so like a day later I messaged him and just said that if he wanted to just be friends we could do that because he was really funny .. and he answered me back .. "what kind of "friends" can we be
" .. so I said never mind .. good luck to you.
Disgusting. So .. I think I have looked at every profile out there and have clicked the interested button on everyone I could possibly be compatible with and nothing. I guess I know why I am single. I'm over it. I will be single forever and I just need to accept that and find something to with my life.
There was a super cute one that I winked at and was shocked that he responded to me .. we messaged on the site for a couple days and then one day he didn't answer me back, so like a day later I messaged him and just said that if he wanted to just be friends we could do that because he was really funny .. and he answered me back .. "what kind of "friends" can we be
" .. so I said never mind .. good luck to you.Disgusting. So .. I think I have looked at every profile out there and have clicked the interested button on everyone I could possibly be compatible with and nothing. I guess I know why I am single. I'm over it. I will be single forever and I just need to accept that and find something to with my life.
0
Replies
-
Sounds horrendous. If it's any consolation, a few years I met 4 freaks on the spin off Match.com. It put me off dating for nearly 2 years.
Try POF? I met someone I really connected with on there
It didnt work out, but hey, that's not the fault of POF!
0 -
Don't give up. You're a beautiful girl. Somebody worthy of you is bound to come into your life. :-)0
-
Ugh, I can totally relate. I think you should try the free sites (PoF, OkC) or apps (Tinder, Skout, Meetme, etc.) though. There are creeps there too, but more people tend to talk on free sites, so don't give up yet!0
-
Are the apps anything worth checking into? I have heard a lot of people make fun of Tinder saying it is a meat market. Not that I mind meat .. lol .. just would like a little conversation first .. lolololol0
-
Tinder totally depends on where you are............worth a shot, though!0
-
I actually met new guy on Tinder....only guy I ever met from Tinder. There was one other that I had talked to for a while, but he is the only one I ever met, and hey, it worked out!0
-
I agree with Moe, they are at least worth checking out for a short time. There's a meat market vibe on all of the sites to a degree, so what's the difference really?0
-
Good point. lol0
-
Tinder is very easy to weed through the ones looking to hook up as they are more honest about it then on other sites. It is free and easy to set up so no hurt in trying it.0
-
I'm in the exact same boat. . It didn't used to be this bad.. but I hit 45 and it all came to a screeching halt!.. I thought about giving up entirely, but instead, I'm just going to have to find a way to actually meet people in person (which is not all that easy b/c I'm not a joiner and I'm not a drinker (anymore) and I'm not an extrovert). . But jeez! I gotta do something!. . I'm starting to get set in my ways. I'm concerned I won't be capable of dealing with a girlfriend expecting me to spend time with her and stuff!
But I guess my point is that it's easy to let a lack of success on a site like match.com be discouraging (as it has been for me), but don't give up! (Although everyone keeps telling me that as soon as I give up, that's when I'll find her. . But I've given up like 12 times and it hasn't happened so I'm not sure I believe this anymore. . )0 -
Cameron_1969 wrote: »I'm in the exact same boat. . It didn't used to be this bad.. but I hit 45 and it all came to a screeching halt!.. I thought about giving up entirely, but instead, I'm just going to have to find a way to actually meet people in person (which is not all that easy b/c I'm not a joiner and I'm not a drinker (anymore) and I'm not an extrovert). . But jeez! I gotta do something!. . I'm starting to get set in my ways. I'm concerned I won't be capable of dealing with a girlfriend expecting me to spend time with her and stuff!
But I guess my point is that it's easy to let a lack of success on a site like match.com be discouraging (as it has been for me), but don't give up! (Although everyone keeps telling me that as soon as I give up, that's when I'll find her. . But I've given up like 12 times and it hasn't happened so I'm not sure I believe this anymore. . )
Have you tried Tinder Cam?? As Ruth said, I think it's easy to weed out the hook ups and the freaks, and just get talking to someone you 'click' with.
And I think you have to keep trying, like forever!! A couple got married in their 90's here this week, so you're a young chick my friend
0 -
Hahahaha. . Tinder. .yeah. . well.. I've had exactly ONE match in the last two months and she immediately sent me a picture of her butt, then asked me for money.. I keep swiping though!. .Call me an optimist!0
-
Cameron_1969 wrote: »Hahahaha. . Tinder. .yeah. . well.. I've had exactly ONE match in the last two months and she immediately sent me a picture of her butt, then asked me for money.. I keep swiping though!. .Call me an optimist!
You're kiddin? You're a good looking guy!! Have you got your viking gear on in your pics?? lol0 -
I've tried every pic I have of myself (none great, but some not horrible). . should I try the viking pics.. can't get any worse!0
-
Cameron_1969 wrote: »I've tried every pic I have of myself (none great, but some not horrible). . should I try the viking pics.. can't get any worse!
Yes, try the viking pic! You can see your face and it shows you have a sense of humor!
0 -
No matter what they say or how they try to advertise themselves, dating sites are all about looks. The uber-hot people get a ton of activity and everyone else gets very, very, little . It's probably not a bad for guys because women are more apt to give a guy with a strong personality a chance, even if he isn't a perfect 10 with a six-pack.
There are other kinds of dating services. I haven't ever used one b/c I think they're expensive, but I may try one someday when I'm SURE I'm ready for a relationship. . These are the kind where you sit down with a professional and they interview you and then try to match you up with other clients. .I don't know if these work, but i expect they get a little deeper than just bathroom selfies.0 -
I disagree Cam. I think it's all about how you write your profile AND what pics you show.
AND what you say to make contact.
Like I say, you're a good looking guy, so I'm pretty sure it's not your looks. Mind you, we're talking about beards in another forum, and not all women like them!!!! Any pics without the beard you could try?0 -
Agreed Anna .. I don't message guys with beards. I always picture food and stuff being stuck in them. lol0
-
Cameron_1969 wrote: »No matter what they say or how they try to advertise themselves, dating sites are all about looks. The uber-hot people get a ton of activity and everyone else gets very, very, little . It's probably not a bad for guys because women are more apt to give a guy with a strong personality a chance, even if he isn't a perfect 10 with a six-pack.
There are other kinds of dating services. I haven't ever used one b/c I think they're expensive, but I may try one someday when I'm SURE I'm ready for a relationship. . These are the kind where you sit down with a professional and they interview you and then try to match you up with other clients. .I don't know if these work, but i expect they get a little deeper than just bathroom selfies.
I've tried one of these and spent over a thousand dollars on one. they don't use pictures but they did take a snapshot for themselves. they take in-depth information about you and what you want in a match. HOWEVER... it seems that they don't even USE IT!!! UGH! of the four people that they've matched me with so far only ONE of them have met my criteria! sooooo friggin frustrating! they tried to match me with 5 but one never called me or returned my call, so that's a wasted match. I have 10 with their service. So if you were to ask me right now, NO they are NOT worth it! Oh, and the one that matched was the guy from March that isn't into me but calls me pet names so technically, he's a dud too! So unless within the next five they set me up with is a winner, my advice will be to SAVE YOUR MONEY!
0 -
Yikes!! $1000 is a LOT of cash.
But you never know, within the next 5 may be the ONE!! 0 -
Jennifer10723 wrote: »Agreed Anna .. I don't message guys with beards. I always picture food and stuff being stuck in them. lol
hehehe! me too! However, I am talking to a guy now who has some pics with beard, some without. I told him he looks better without.....
0 -
Judging by your pictures - you're good looking and have a good sense of humor, so I wonder if it's your profile? You can always post it on here and ask for an opinion.0
-
Thanks!
I am not using any dating sites at the moment (except tinder which doesn't even require a profile). .But when I do I will post my profile paragraph here for advice! I never know how much to write or how much I should say about myself or how much I should say about what I'm looking for or whether I'm too wry or too serious or what. . so it would definitely be educational to post it here and see what y'all think. .
One more important point is that things fell off dramatically when I turned 45. I did have some small success at least getting some replies before that fateful day. .
As for the beard. . I look horrible with nothing, although I usually don't keep a full beard, just a bit around the mouth. .
0 -
I dont see why your age has anything to do with it. 45 is a great age!! Unless you're targeting women a lot younger??
Also, I seldom contact men on Tinder who say nothing in their profile!! Cos invariably if you're a good looking guy in your 40's then you're just after a hook up!! THAT is the impression women get from just a pic. So I'd write a little about yourself on there to dispel the myth...
0 -
Jennifer10723 wrote: »Agreed Anna .. I don't message guys with beards. I always picture food and stuff being stuck in them. lol
I thought I was the only one!!! I can't stand beards and the recent beard trend is terrible. They even have Beard Oil. Ewwww! Why would I want a slick oily beard chafing my face while kissing a guy?! 5:00 shadow on the other hand is perfect though, in my opinion.
I have tried them all. POF (multiple times), eHarmony, match, Tinder, OkCupid, Badoo (probably the worst). TONS of creeps and guys "only after 1 thing". I give up, delete all dating apps, then get bored and figure "why not"....and sign back up. Recently nothing has developed aside from texting or messaging through the website. I don't want a text buddy. I'm 31 not 14. I have plenty of IRL friends for that. One (younger) guy got mad because I stopped responding after he would just constantly text me "Good morning" "What are you doing?" "Goodnight". Then when I would log onto the website he would message me through there and say something like "Bored huh? What are you doing up so late?" That was it for like 2 weeks! LEAVE ME ALONE!! LOL! Then I felt bad but he eventually messaged me "You could at least respond..." Why? So you can not talk to me all day then message me "Good morning" tomorrow?! Others have done the same...messaged for awhile about shared interests or work, etc...then nothing...then "Hey stranger haven't talked to you for awhile." Sooooo what happened to guys asking the girl out on an actual date? Is that not a thing anymore? One guy I actually had a few phone conversations with texted me "So when am I going to see you?" I said "Whenever you ask me out on a date!" Yes, I know "It's 2014/take the initiative/girl power". I get it. Is that so wrong that I WANT someone to go after ME instead of the other way around? On the other hand, I fear I may be stuck in my ways also. Or too picky. Or both. I kind of just don't care anymore. I've become complacent. I'm not happy being alone but I'm not exactly sad either...plus I need to drop this weight. Which is why I'm here. ::shrug:: Aside from a 2-month relationship a few years ago, I've been single for 7 years. I'm only 31.0 -
laurenz1017 wrote: »Jennifer10723 wrote: »Agreed Anna .. I don't message guys with beards. I always picture food and stuff being stuck in them. lol
I thought I was the only one!!! I can't stand beards and the recent beard trend is terrible. They even have Beard Oil. Ewwww! Why would I want a slick oily beard chafing my face while kissing a guy?! 5:00 shadow on the other hand is perfect though, in my opinion.
Beardcists! Shame on both of you. ( T _ T) lol j/k though I am participating in Noshavember. My current profile pic shows 2 weeks so far. I am on the fence about keeping it after November is over though.
0 -
@lacroyx: See yours isn't a bad length at all, I think. It's still pretty light. Fitting actually.
I'm moreso referring to this:
0 -
Cesar - It's not all women, I'm a fan of well groomed beards and gotta say, yours looks good! I also like your new pic, very handsome.
0 -
@Cameron: why would things slow down due to your age??? that doesn't make sense. also, who says you don't look good without facial hair of some sort? we wouldn't know cuz we haven't seen you without it.
@everyone: i keep hearing about Tinder. is it worth my time? should i sign up for it or is it strictly a bootie call site? I do ok in that area as it is.
also: my take on beards... depends on the guy. clean shaven face: YAY! well groomed beard - if it fits the guy - oooo la la! sexy sexy! duck dynasty beards - BLECH!0
This discussion has been closed.