Online gaming and anxiety?

rowlandsw

Stupid sounding i know but i keep finding myself as stressed out about playing Destiny with other gamers online as i do having to go out in the real world for medical appointments. I always figured my social anxiety issues were glued to the real world, i log in and feel so disoriented with others around and i got a random friend request and nearly spazzed.

MagJam2004

That's understandable. I have an incredible amount of social anxiety and it doesn't just disappear when I log into a multiplayer game. I remember playing Age of Conan and really just loving the solo scene. It got to a point though where I wanted to do the group quests and rather than pug myself out, I decided I needed to join a guild. Sending a tell to a member was beyond awkward. I was WAY to formal, and I basically wrote a book in response to his questions. Oddly enough though, folks were by and large pretty nice.

I think we make things harder on ourselves than it needs to be. Being on MFP has helped me a lot in all that simply because I can express myself with a lot more freedom than I feel in conversing in real life. I don't internet very well though, and I still get weird sometimes knowing that the people on here are real people and not some NPC with scripted responses. But again, those folks have either left my FL, I've left theirs, messaged me and told me I'm an idiot and not to take things so seriously, or they have simply laughed and carried on.

While I'm not going to tell you not to let it bother you, I will encourage you to not let it stop you. Risk versus reward. What do you stand to lose by logging in, doing some quests or missions, helping someone out with theirs, and seeing what happens from there? I would however tell you that it is easy for folks like us (a bit presumptuous of me I realize) to over-invest in online circles. Just because this guy send me a friend request doesn't mean he wants to be my new best friend. Just because this girl wants to join my party doesn't mean that I am now beholden to always send her/accept her group invite whenever I log in. Know going in, that the vast majority of folks probably don't care as much as you do. You might find some, and get to know some, and have a great time with it. But one thing is for certain; you won't if you don't. Meaning you'll never meet anyone worth playing with online if you don't give it a try and stretch the boundary a bit. Take it in steps, take it at your own pace, and no worries.

In the immortal words of Chief Three-trees, "On three we charge."

rowlandsw

It's getting easier, especially with the PSN network being down for folks lol. Destiny was empty at 1030 last night which was great until i got in a jam with nobody around for 5 minutes lol. Now i just have anxiety over how much i paid and how little the game makes sense.
I figure the friend request is planning ahead: he obviously saw something that impressed him or maybe he's new too and if you friend early you'll have folks your level ready to go for the mandatory multiplayer parts later on.