Socially acceptable body shaming

soldier4242

Hello MFP, it has been a while but I am back. I recently had a conversation that got me thinking about body shaming.

A group of people were looking at a magazine with a female body builder on the cover. They blatantly stated that she looked disgusting(I thought she was hot). This is not the first time that I had heard this said about female body builders. They went on and on about how no women should ever look that way and that women are meant to have curves.

I think it is fair to say that if someone were to say a fat women looked disgusting and that women were meant to have muscles they would not be met with cheers of agreement. People who were at one point holding up the flag of tolerance claiming that we should stop shaming people for their bodies have become the very people who will call others "silicone barbie dolls" or say female body builders are "disgusting."

I am just using this one conversation as the example but I have seen this trend in many places. I know not everyone is like this but I feel that I am seeing it often enough that it warrants asking.

How has the tone of the popular discussion brought us to a point where we gleefully accept body shaming only if the one being shamed is in fantastic shape that they had to work hard for?

emdunn0715

Hi what do you mean by body shaming it is not a phrase I am familiar with?

soldier4242

The term body shaming was coined by members of the fat acceptance movement to describe the act of insulting shaming or embarrassing someone for having a body type that is outside the social norm.

There was a fat acceptance movement that was born out the identity politics of the 1960's. Identity politics as I understand them are positions that are taken by a group of people who share an aspect about themselves that unite their interests.

It used to be far more social unacceptable to be fat. People were shamed and socially ostracized for it regardless of whether or not it was cause by sloth or genetics. I can remember in one of my anthropology classes watching an old black and white commercial explaining how important it is for Timmy to eat his vegetables and exercise or he would be fat and he wouldn't be able to get a date to the big dance.

The trouble that I was observing was that while to goal of the movement was to eliminate body shaming all together that goal has been cast aside. Now it is all about creating a new socially acceptable body type and shaming those that don't fall within that.

emdunn0715

Thanks for that- it puts it in context for me. To answer your initial question it is a sad state of affairs where we are but I imagine we have not come any more tolerant at all it is just that obesity has become such a problem it is no longer considered outside the social norm.

I am currently reading a book called the compassionate mind by Paul Gilbert which made an interesting distinction between judgement and preference - just because we are being non-judgemental does not mean we have to give up our preference. So while they are intitled to dislike that figure they should probably of expressed it more sensitively because like you said it is a shame there is no appreciation of the hard work that goes into creating a figure like that

soldier4242

I do like the concept of distinguishing between preference and judgement because it wasn't their preference that bothered me. It was the fact that I do not think they even realized that by claiming that real women are meant to have curves they are setting a new standard of beauty and they are imposing their preferred body type on others.

If we are to conclude that body shaming is going to happen and we have to simply choose which kind we prefer than I would have to say I would prefer that we shame the obese rather than shaming the physically fit.

Fortunately I am of the opinion that we don't have to shame anyone but if you want to be able to say someone is disgusting then you better not whine when someone says that you are disgusting because muscular women do have curves too and some people are going to prefer them.

emdunn0715

It's going to happen but we don't have to be a part of it and if possible try and make people do think twice about it.

SemperAnticus1643

I personally try to stay away from those types of conversations. I do think obesity has become normal so no one really says much about it anymore. But heaven forbid Maria King post another picture of herself asking everyone what their excuse is. I think a big part of the judgmental comments towards "fit women" stems from jealousy. They either don't have the discipline to get to the point of those women or lack the drive. It takes work to get a great physique. We now live in a time where if it's not an instant gratification then we don't do it.

I have a greater sense of respect, especially now that I'm one of those girls in the gym and trying to eat right all the dang time, for those women, and people in general, that have and maintain a very nice physique. Will I judge those that don't have it, no. Who am I to judge about how a person wants to live their life. For all I know, there is a health issue they have to deal with. I have noticed that I do spend quite a bit more time with people that are in the gym or at least understand why I go. I don't have to answer the silly questions of "Are you trying to become a body builder?" or "Are you trying to get men to hit on you in the free weight section?"

Grimmerick

I personally think body building women(clarification: I don't mean women that lift, I mean the very tanned, competition style bodybuilders, muscles are beautiful I just don't like that many) don't look good that doesn't make me jealous though,I just really find that type of figure unappealing, I don't think fat people look good either, or too skinny people. I would NEVER say that to or about anyone! That is my own personal opinion and anyone who blasts their own personal preference out loud in a negative way just so someone will hear them is an @sshole and should be the one getting shamed for their ugly attitude. I also think these people are fewer and further between but seems like more because of the internet and it's vast reaches. Actually funnily enough I get this with food sometimes, people shame my food because they say it looks gross and they can't believe I would want to eat it, so this stuff happens in other areas too.