Almost made it . . .
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DesignGuy
Posts: 457 Member
So I have been on EH for a few months and thought it was stupid that I was paying and not messaging anyone. I figured I should at least try the system out before I cancel. Side note, I feel a bit dumb paying just so I can read profiles and see pics, but I'm a writer, so I mark EH up as a business deduction (character research for stories).
Anyway, up until this past week I didn't even know how EH worked past getting 7 or so matches a day. It all seemed odd. All I knew is the system wouldn't let me send "OMG u r so hot --> I hav best gramer eva. U likey music 2?" messages.
I decided to open with a few ladies. Two of the three replied and I went up the ladder. Kind of a fun system.
With one I let it go to the "eH Mail" thing. No clue how that works, but I sent her a message last night for the heck of it. Either way, I've completed my quest of exploring their system.
Before I cancel, I'm tempted to contact the woman who claims to have a phD but can't form proper sentences. That might be fun.
For anyone that has went further, what are the next steps? Do you just msg back n forth until both parties agree to a phone call?
Anyway, up until this past week I didn't even know how EH worked past getting 7 or so matches a day. It all seemed odd. All I knew is the system wouldn't let me send "OMG u r so hot --> I hav best gramer eva. U likey music 2?" messages.
I decided to open with a few ladies. Two of the three replied and I went up the ladder. Kind of a fun system.
With one I let it go to the "eH Mail" thing. No clue how that works, but I sent her a message last night for the heck of it. Either way, I've completed my quest of exploring their system.
Before I cancel, I'm tempted to contact the woman who claims to have a phD but can't form proper sentences. That might be fun.
For anyone that has went further, what are the next steps? Do you just msg back n forth until both parties agree to a phone call?
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I have only recently begun to online date but I would prefer to just email with the person and then meet up, skipping the middle man phone call. Maybe it's because I hate the phone but the idea of a guy from online calling me to talk to me makes me cringe.
And yes unfortunately most of the ladies wait for a man to send a message. I would never send a man a message, personally, so it tends to fall on the men. I have only gotten two emails since I started (and one was from a man twice my age, no thanks). The other guy just looked at my profile and picked out a couple things that caught his eye. It felt more genuine than a "hello, how are you?" I got from the older man.0 -
i didnt do EH, but i did chmistry which is similar in that the first set of communications between you and that person are guided by then.
i met my last bf through chemistry. i messaged him first we we did the guided message dance some of which was really fun because there were questions to send (you picked the questions) and they had to answer. by the time we were done with the guided questions we did a phone conversation to schedule a date.
i personally need the phone call rather than email because i dont want to be surprised by a guy with a voice higher than mine. i also have no interest in sending pointless emails back and forth since i'm not looking for a penpal.
if a guy seems to be stalling a meet by too much emailing then i figure he has *kitten* to hide and is probably hoping i'd fall in love with his email/phone persona and overlook the fact that he either lied about his age/height/education/lack of teeth :laugh:0 -
It's been a while since i was on EH, but I think you swap standard questions first, and then go to personal messages and then yes, it's open contact so you can swap numbers if you want/feel comfortable.
I'm much more comfortable speaking on the phone before I meet up. I get a feel for a voice and a character first and I need to click with someone on the phone before I agree to meet them. I'm not into quick/coffee dates though, so this method may be too long winded for a 'meet and greet' type scenario. I like to get to know someone a bit first and then I know I can handle a night out with him, even if there is not physical spark.
Just play it by ear. I'd say some guys want to say a few words first, some want long drawn out email conversations, some guys want phone contact, and some guys want to meet straight away. I've encountered all types, so I just stick to what I feel comfortable with.
Good luck :flowerforyou:0 -
When I did EH I went on one date. We ended up skipping some steps and meeting in about 5 days (fast for EH standards) since his year was coming to an end and he dodn't want to renew.
I have never been one to email or talk on the phone a lot before meeting. I would rather just meet for a drink or something and see someone in person first.0 -
When I did EH I went on one date. We ended up skipping some steps and meeting in about 5 days (fast for EH standards) since his year was coming to an end and he dodn't want to renew.
I have never been one to email or talk on the phone a lot before meeting. I would rather just meet for a drink or something and see someone in person first.
this is an interesting topic, Idk how EH works but I've been using match. I have always had phone contact before meeting in person because I think you get a better feel for the person to make sure they aren't completely psycho and thus not putting yourself in a dangerous position (for the ladies atleast).
but now that I think about it, the one guy I didn't talk to before we met in person is the one guy I fell hard for.
not sure which one works best tho. looking back I don't know how I agreed to meet before talking. Then again I hate giving out my number so its almost a catch 22.0 -
Nolachick, I get what you mean about dangerous position. It goes both ways. There are crazy people out there. I'd rather just meet someone at a Starbucks somewhere in the city (or in another state LOL). Best to buy a "burn phone" and give out that number.
As for email/phone/meeting, I go with the flow, but I'm a good communicator, so I like to meet a lady in person and see how well she communicates, verbally and non-verbally (one of my turn on/offs). With email/text/etc there's a delay so it's easy for someone to sit and think about their response and on the phone there's a lack of visual indicators unless you Skype or something.0 -
I am not familiar with the process but have heard of different apps for your phone, where you give out anumber that is given to you and rings to your phone, but person never has your real number. Some have discussed it on here before.
As for EH communication, I always either went to personal email or phone after 2 or 3 initial emails on the site.0 -
i've been on (in the course of the past eight years, on and off):
-okcupid
-match
-eharmony
-plentyoffish
-jdate
-craigslist w4m (dating--not casual encounters)
-quarterlife
i met my ex on okcupid. i think i liked that site the best....but i am happily OFF of dating sites and have been for around 5 months now. so much less drama.0 -
i met my ex on okcupid. i think i liked that site the best....but i am happily OFF of dating sites and have been for around 5 months now. so much less drama.
oooh are u off because u found u a man? hehe :laugh:0 -
i met my ex on okcupid. i think i liked that site the best....but i am happily OFF of dating sites and have been for around 5 months now. so much less drama.
oooh are u off because u found u a man? hehe :laugh:
hahah, i wish ^. nah, i'm just doing me for a while. don't have to deal with all of the crazies anymore! i found myself getting obsessed with checking messages constantly, etc. and first dates with guys you meet online are always a tad awkward. but yeah, i'm just being single and really actually enjoying myself
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