06.15.15- Ramblings

carimiller7391

Good morning ladies and gents!! Hope everyone had an excellent weekend. Mine was weird. I really wanted to take the weekend and concentrate on nixing the carbs. YEAH, didn't happen. I think starting a LCHFMP program today may be easier for me since I spend most of the day at work and most of my eating is done at work. I can control it more. I did manage to look up some keto recipes that I'm interested in trying. I also looked up some fat bombs/cheese puffs also that look quite tasty.

I spent most of the weekend hanging out with Reggie (what a surprise, right?). I got to meet his sister and we were drinking this new Island Fusion Light vodka sorbet. It was good, but not worth it to me. I caved to the peer pressure. NOT GOOD. I know. Reggie also got to meet my best friend Robyn. It was only for a few minutes, I was picking up some stuff from her.

Right now, my entire body feels drained. I know I am dehydrated from the water pill my surgeon has me on, plus I did not get in a lot of water this weekend. Normally at work I get in 100-120oz, this weekend I was lucky if I got that in total. Plus, I just feel BLAH. Kinda of foggy... and guess what... I know it's the carbs doing it to me. I've read enough info to know that carbs and I just don't do well together.

On a different note, I went out for a team building event at a restuarant on Thursday ( I was still fumming on Friday so I didn't post about it.) It was my unit manager, most of the people on her team. The guys I work with are in their late 20's and early 30's and are a bunch of PIGS. Every girl that walked by, they talked about. They talked about how ugly some of the men were also. The senior mgr of our area stopped by, she mentioned how "fat" she thought she was. Maybe I am just sensitive, but after the first hour of this BS, I was ready to leave. I even said to them, "I hope someday you don't have an accident or something that changes your appearance and some *kitten* thinks it's OK to talk about you"... I am not even sure they caught what I was saying. Maybe I am sensitive, maybe I was just raised better or know better. You don't talk about someone, especially if you haven't walked in their shoes....All I do know, I am so turned off by their actions and comments, I lost all respect for them. I'm really hoping that I can find another job in the near future, I don't think I can work with the "boys" on my team anymore.

You know what... I haven't journalled lately, I've found myself rambling here holds me more accountable and relieves some of the stress. Plus on some of the things I ramble about, I hope someone here may understand and know they aren't they only one.

Hugs,
Cari

KnitOrMiss

My weekend was rejuvenating. It was the first time in months I had my fiance full on belly laughing. That job had really sucked the life out of him... While this means we're back in the hellish financial struggles, at least I have my love back...

Cari, the only way I can tell you to set yourself up for success on the LCHF path is planning. Pre cook or buy things that will fill the fat needs first. Eat every bit of fat you can stuff in. Do not have the carb stuff where you can get to it. As your mom not to get the stuff that is your weakness, or to keep it out of the main thoroughfare. I had to stuff myself silly, including not counting calories AT ALL the first week or two, to get through. And the only way you will succeed on this plan or any plan will be to make yourself a priority. I'm sorry that peer pressure got to you. I'd suggest asking Reggie to become your cheerleader and your enforcer, bouncer-style. Tell him that his strength will reinforce yours, etc. Ask him to field anyone's ideas and suggestions before they get to you... Even though alcohol doesn't have carbs all the time (most spirits don't), the body processes them first, and slows down everything else.

I'm glad you still had a good weekend. I personally would blog about every bit of your carby weekend, how bad you feel, and the like. The more misery you record, the less likely you are to report.

And OMG - the team building, WTF is wrong with people...

Please, do me a favor - for you, get back to that journaling! You NEED it. It is part of your path to success. Being accountable and getting rid of stress are keys to success...

Hugs, Carly

maoribadger

Will come back to this. If I start rambling I may be here some time as having an odd brain day but assuming it's the ocd and I don't have to listen to me. Will try and Marshall my thoughts a bit later on for where I'm currently at

maoribadger

Sorry I didnt come back to this before. I was having kind of an odd day. Having some really weird OCD thoughts which I have since blocked out assuming they are utterly deranged.

Finally got in with my GP about my bloods after the receptionist told me they were fine. I am in fact still anaemic. I said to the doc last time I felt this way ie exhausted, lethargic it was anaemia related. She tried telling me it was probably my depression, my diet or being a night shift worker but I pointed out my depression was best controlled its been in months, ive been a night shift worker for years and my diet except for during last cpl weeks has been better so she acquiesed to a 2 month trial of iron tabs

KnitOrMiss

maoribadger wrote: »

Sorry I didnt come back to this before. I was having kind of an odd day. Having some really weird OCD thoughts which I have since blocked out assuming they are utterly deranged.

Finally got in with my GP about my bloods after the receptionist told me they were fine. I am in fact still anaemic. I said to the doc last time I felt this way ie exhausted, lethargic it was anaemia related. She tried telling me it was probably my depression, my diet or being a night shift worker but I pointed out my depression was best controlled its been in months, ive been a night shift worker for years and my diet except for during last cpl weeks has been better so she acquiesed to a 2 month trial of iron tabs

Good on you for silencing the voices (or at least ignoring them) - and for pushing back against the doc. I think being armed with facts kind of stuns them into cooperation sometimes!

carimiller7391

Good for you Lise in standing up for yourself with your doc. Sometimes (more often then not), I feel more educated then my doc. She went to school, but I know my body.

KnitOrMiss

carimiller7391 wrote: »

Good for you Lise in standing up for yourself with your doc. Sometimes (more often then not), I feel more educated then my doc. She went to school, but I know my body.

My pelvic floor physical therapist said that it is awesome how well I know the dysfunctions of my body because it allowed her to shift her focus from having to educate me on my body to being able to help me repair the damage. I honestly think it is another side bonus of having been heavy for so long - we have plenty of time to become intimately familiar with all the ways our bodies are messed up... *sigh*

maoribadger

I think the one size fits all medical model really doesnt is the problem. Just because my levels are borderline doesnt mean it doesnt affect me

KnitOrMiss

maoribadger wrote: »

I think the one size fits all medical model really doesnt is the problem. Just because my levels are borderline doesnt mean it doesnt affect me

It took me three different endocrinologists to "get" that concept. The last one finally said, "Just because you in range doesn't mean you are in range FOR YOU..."

maoribadger

Yep i think i clearly 'feel' anaemia more keenly than maybe smeone else does

KnitOrMiss

I think seriously that those of us who struggle and have been obese for long times have gotten so in tune with our bodies that we have to convince the doctors to believe us!