Trying to get motivated to strength train; anyone else just starting?

benevempress

Hi all, I'm 48 years old, full time working mother of two special needs kids and have lost about 65 pounds in the last 13 months with MFP and walking (using my Fitbit). I have done NO weight lifting or strength training because just walking and calorie counting felt like all I could manage. Now I'm at what the online calculators tell me is an "ideal" weight (148 at 5'10") and I look fine while dressed, but I look terrible naked. I'm a pear shape naturally, so my shoulders and ribs are looking bony, my breasts are like deflated balloons, I've still got a little "spare tire" just above my pelvic bones, my bottom still seems large but droopy and my thighs still have fairly large areas of grabbable fat. Obviously I've lost muscle as well as fat in that 65 pounds. I won't start complaining about the droopy skin because I know others have it much worse than me and I can't do anything about that.

I've been telling myself that I need to start doing strength training to see if that will improve my naked appearance and my self-image, but it's been two months now and I still haven't started. I'm looking for some online friends who are just starting out strength training, whether through bodyweight exercises, machines, or dumbbells. I'm hoping we can be accountability buddies to keep trying and gradually make progress. If you happen to be over 40, a mother, and/or crazy busy, that's just a bonus!

CarlydogsMom

OK. I could've written your entire post except I was at your point when I was 52 instead of 48. Lost about 70 pounds, mostly through diet and walking (and then jogging a bit and then mountain biking). 5'10", got down to 148 lbs and felt the same way! Loose skin, still fat on the thighs, etc. I figure that without doing any strength/resistance training through that entire process, probably 20-25 pounds of that 70 pounds lost was muscle.

I took up weight training a couple winters ago, and it has transformed my life. Go for it!!! There are programs out there that provide exercise regimens that work your entire body, so don't try to make something up. Read, watch YouTube videos on proper form, hire a personal trainer (which is what I did, best money spent ever) to teach you form, whatever you must do....just do it.

Decent programs include Stronglifts 5x5 (free with an app too), which is generally one of the highest regarded programs. There are plenty others. There is a group on here called Stronglifts 5x5 For Women, and another group here called "Eat, Train, Progress." Both can offer support, critique videos of your movements, and encouragement. Do a search for the thread "HALP! Heavy lifting made me SUPAH bulky!!!" to see some inspirational journeys of women lifting weights. Another good resource is Rippetoe's Starting Strength book(s).

Remember a few things: To get started you really have to break down your mindset that you've had throughout your losing-weight process and start a different way of thinking about your body and your weight. You really can't be focused on a weight number/scale number. While lifting weights, your weight could fluctuate by several pounds in a 24-48 hour period as you stress your muscles with weight, and as they retain water to repair. Take measurements instead. It's actually really freeing to not have to obsess over a scale weight.

Not only that, you have to remember that there is a difference between building strength and building muscle. For a weight-training "newbie," strength gains are made VERY quickly, much more rapidly than you are actually building muscle. It's both a result of being new and also having your body neurologically adapt to the movements you're doing. There definitely is a correlation between muscle size and strength, but in the beginning your strength will use both weights and neuro-muscular adaptation to build. Then you'll level off a bit.

Third: don't be afraid of "bulking up." IT WON'T HAPPEN. First of all, think about it...it's not like you're going to wake up one morning and all of a sudden be "bulky." Women do NOT build muscles like men; we don't have the hormone makeup. Don't be afraid to lift heavy--the lighter you go, the more "cardio" it becomes, and won't get you to your goals.

My story:
I knew I had to get on a strength training program after losing my weight (now that I look back, I wish I had started weight training right in the beginning). I had done "those machines" off and on for years and years, and wanted something different. I wanted to learn how to use the free weights, barbells, plates, etc. and how to do compound lifts.

So I joined our local small-town gym and hired a trainer, telling him that's what I wanted. I didn't need to pay someone to help me through the machines, nope. I wanted to step it up. He was totally up for it, and I have to say, I NEVER heard him say "gosh, you're 52, you should start with the machines or with body weight..." Once he did an assessment and understood my physical weak points (herniated discs in my back, sciatic nerve damage in right foot, a few other things), he went to work.

I went to him 3 times/week, for 30 minute sessions. I was almost always a noodle after each session. I LOVED it. He emphasized FORM over all things, and paid very close attention to my form with every lift. He was amazing. I started with the bar on two lifts I think (the bar is 45 lbs)--squat and deadlift (well, deadlifts we raised the bar to the proper height). With overhead press and bench, I had to start with dumbbells.

Anyway, long story short, weight lifting transformed my health, confidence, and overall physical fitness for all the OTHER things I do in life--bike, lift things, move things around, walk...you name it.

Do I look different? Well, yes. I should really take a set of "after" photos, but probably won't until the end of this summer. I usually spend winters "bulking" up (trying to continually build muscle, which requires a caloric excess and involves putting on both muscle and a bit of fat), and now am entering my "cut" cycle for the summer months where I focus on maintaining my strength through continued lifting, but cut my calories and up my cardio (biking mostly) to reduce my fat.

I went from 148 to about 155 in my first winter lifting; got down to about 150 after last summer, and am now at about 158 after my second winter of lifting. Now I want to get my butt in gear to "cut" those 10 pounds off. THEN I'll be happy to take a few "after" photos. But really, I don't care all that much about weight any more! I love that I started barely able to overhead press 20 pounds, and got up to 70. Or squat with just the bar, and got up to about 115 pounds. Or deadlift that in 6 months went from 45 pounds to 150. I'm not progressing as fast as many women do, but I'm also in my 50's and am doing this with a few physical issues.

You can choose to lift while trying to maintain the same weight, which is known as "body recomposition." That's a VERY SLOW way to lose some fat while building some muscle. It takes a very long time (think: muscles need calories to build; if you're not feeding that need, your muscles develop super slow). There is a thread in the Maintaining Weight boards that provides lots of information on recomposition--just search that word.

You could also let yourself eat in a slight caloric excess, like 250 calories per day, so maybe a 1/2-lb a week gain, while lifting progressively heavier and heavier weights, and that will help you build actual muscle a bit quicker than recomposition (you'll also gain a bit of fat, too, but that's life). Then when you've gotten to some point that you are happy with, you then "cut" (cut calories to lose), while maintaining your lifting, and drop the few pounds of fat you gained.

Bottom line is that if you're not happy with how you look, about the only thing that will change your actual shape and body-fat and muscle content is weight lifting. So you either go for it or wish you did....good luck, you'll be happy you did!!!