“Wow! You are really slimming down!”
Mellykay88
Posts: 307 Member
How do you all respond to comments about your weight loss? I’ve been getting comment from Co-workers lately and I always feel so awkward and don’t really know what to say. “Thanks for noticing?”
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I feel so awkward when people says things like that to me. Kind of like I don't want them to comment at all but in a weird way it's nice that they notice like it means you're actually doing something and it's working. That said I usually mutter thanks and change the subject. One thing is for sure they NEVER want to hear that it's CICO they want to hear that it's magic and easy so they can do it too! Or so they can pull you down on the oddness of it!3
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I try to make eye contact, smile, and say something like "Yes, I am (slimming down)" or "Yes, I have (lost weight)." No details unless I have no other option because like @fatoldladyonamission said CICO is too boring and people always feel compelled to suggest faster ways I could lose weight, etc. If they do start pitching the latest fads, I just keep that smile plastered on my face and let them talk. Then, I try to always end the conversation with a thanks because I do appreciate their notice and appreciation of my efforts.
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Sorry I’m new here what is CICO1
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CICO Calories in Calories out0
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I always feel weird when people who have not seen me since i was 500 pounds see me and make comments about how great i must be feeling, but how I still have so far to go, like hello I am living this I know how hard it is and how far it is, but I smile and thank them for noticing, and when I tell people how I lost the weight they always say I wish I could lose weight, but I do not want to measure or count calories & I definitely do not want to exercise. that makes me crazy because that is what made me fat not doing it3
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@keeblerelfkin Wow. What a back-handed compliment they're giving you! Maybe it's just me, but that sounds a lot like, "You look better than you did, but you're still not great!"
Most people don't notice my weight loss at all until I mention it though. Usually they'll notice I'm eating differently or want to know why I'm turning down donuts, etc and I'll say, "I'm counting my calories," which leads to unsolicited advice on the diet or cleanse or whatever they think I should do, so I'll cut that short by saying, "Well, what I'm doing is working pretty well for me so far! I've lost almost 40 lbs." Then suddenly they can tell a difference. lol
@fatoldladyonamission & @losingles It's crazy how many people want to give that unsolicited advice. It seems like I'm always doing something wrong! Either I'm eating too few calories for my size or too many calories or drinking too much water or too much diet coke or depriving myself too much. Everyone seems to feel entitled to their opinion about what I put into my own body, especially when they find out I'm consciously making healthier decisions... I don't know what it is, but it sure aggravates me. And when I lost 100 lbs in my early 20's I had a coworker who just absolutely refused to believe I did it by counting calories and exercising. I actually found out she was going around telling everyone that I had weight loss surgery and didn't want to admit it. I kept thinking, "So, when exactly was I off work long enough for this supposed surgery??"
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@Keeblerelfkin I know what you mean! People say "oh you much feel so much better now!" when the truth is no, actually, I don't usually feel much better. But I do appreciate the supportive comments I get from folks who have noticed. I carry my weight very well, but that means that I have to lose A LOT before it finally becomes noticeable, but 100 lbs gone has started to get people's attention!2
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I guess I’m not the only one who feels weird about it! At a family Christmas party last year, my cousin kept asking how much I’d lost. I just kept saying “a lot”. I’m not comfortable giving a specific number to some people. The more I lose the more I feel this way. By the time I get to my goal I’ll have lost around 300 lbs which is HUGE, and I may change how I feel, but not everyone in my family needs to know where I started.2
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@mellykay88 I can understand not wanting to tell people how much you've lost! People keep asking me how much I want to lose and I don't feel comfortable telling them because it feels like it would be easy for them to do the math and then figure out approx how much I weigh now, so I usually laugh and say something really exaggerated like, "6 tons!" or "Oh, about a million pounds!"2
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i have lost an average adult man and have a new born giraffe to go when all is said and done i will have lost 315 pounds but I still have a ways to go 1
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I realized recently while carrying in pellets for my stove that I had lost the equivalent of 2 1/2 of those bags. I couldn't carry 2 of them into the house at the same time and yet I realized that I had been carrying that much extra weight on my body for years!
I've also managed to lose over one 80lb bag of quick crete concrete mix, or the equivalent of three 8" concrete blocks.
I love charts like the above, @Keeblerelfkin - they really help put things into perspective!3 -
@Keeblerelfkin I love that chart! I’m at a newborn giraffe with the Oxford Dictionary plus a two year old to go 1
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@Keeblerelfkin I love it!! I've lost a mid-sized microwave and an average human brain! ...wait a minute.2
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@rabidhamster87 that’s exactly me! I don’t want to tell anyone wha5 I’ve lost so that they can look at me and think bloody hell shes lost that much and it barely shows! Because I’m another who apparently doesn’t look as heavy as I am although I feel like I look twice my current weight when I look in a mirror! I just wish everyone would completely avoid the whole topic. What’s wrong with just saying hey, you look great!1
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Ooh it didn’t kitten out my bloody hell! Guess it doesn’t do English swearing haha!0
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Hahahahaha it took me a while to figure out what the kittens meant! But I’m pretty oblivious a lot of the time.
I wish people would just say, you look great today and leave it at that. I feel the same... if I tell people I’ve lost 130 lbs I worry they’ll think “Well she’s still big... how must she have weighed before?” Probably just me worrying for no reason.1 -
I had lost about 75 lbs a few years ago (believe me, I had PLENTY more to lose at that point). But as soon as people started commenting that I looked like I had lost weight, I started slacking for some reason. I didn't purposely say to myself, well I look better now so I can have more brownies for dessert... I think in a way, I suddenly felt more pressure to do well, and that slowed me down. I don't usually tell people I'm trying to lose weight for that exact reason.2
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evilfairies wrote: »I had lost about 75 lbs a few years ago (believe me, I had PLENTY more to lose at that point). But as soon as people started commenting that I looked like I had lost weight, I started slacking for some reason. I didn't purposely say to myself, well I look better now so I can have more brownies for dessert... I think in a way, I suddenly felt more pressure to do well, and that slowed me down. I don't usually tell people I'm trying to lose weight for that exact reason.
I am exactly the same as you! I never tell anyone other than my hubby and daughter and I only tell them because they live here too and would notice! I just want the whole subject to be a non subject. I’d be happy if nobody ever commented again! Part of my issue comes from my mother being a queen dieter. She’s done them all over the years. I’ve watched her yo-yo up and down more times than I can remember. For most of my young life there was a piece of paper on the front of our fridge with her weigh ins marked on it. Possibly that’s part of why I struggle with weight but possibly not. My younger sister never has. Trouble is whenever I start to do any kind of weight loss she always Butts in trying to get me to join her latest fad! Admittedly she’s now lighter than she’s ever been but she’s still yo-yo'ing. 6 weeks at WW followed by 2 weeks gaining it back and so on. I’m just not interested in doing that but oh my does she go on like an expert about what I should be doing! I do know it’s out of concern and I’m glad she cares enough fro be concerned but I can do without the lectures about it!
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@fatoldladyonamission Oh I know how that goes, except in my case, it's my brother. We both have struggled with weight for years, and he was bad for yo-yoing and trying different fads from all kinds of supplements to some diet plan that involved pre-portioned color-coded cups to intermittent fasting to all kinds of things, and each time, he'd be quick to try to talk me into getting on board with his idea because "you'd loose so much more weight!" I'd just say that men and women lose weight different and what works for some won't work for others, and calorie counting is working for me so I'll just stick with it.
I lost some weight in college but gained it all back and then some when I entered the work force. In 2012, I lost 90 lbs calorie counting, but I plateaued and struggled to lose more, I had a roommate who while trying to be supportive had no interest in cleaning up their own diet, so there was temptation everywhere, I was struggling with stress and depression, and then I found I had thyroid cancer. A lot of factors just piled up on me, and in the next 5 years, I gain 98% of it back. That's a killer because it really heaps on the guilt. Thankfully, I still had a lot of support from folks I work with who were quick to really be encouraging when I started losing again, but then again, I wasn't around them when I lost it the first time.....
that might be why my mother doesn't discuss it with me. She's really quick to talk to folks about my brother's weight loss and how fantastic he looks after losing 180 lbs in 4 months due to WLS, but she doesn't often tell folks that I'm losing weight (and I know this by the shocked look I get from folks who haven't seen me for a while) and for hte longest time, she wouldn't talk about my weight loss at all. I guess she's in the mindset that I've has done this before and gained it back, so she's kind of holding her breath and waiting to see if its going to stick this time around.1 -
It’ll stick @bmeadows380 you’ve got this and you’ve got a great supportive network behind you here.0
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I’ve had three people mention my weight loss today! Including the dreaded “how much have you lost?” Question.0
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@Mellykay88 I know it's hard, but just try to take it as a compliment. They are noticing all of your hard work! If they ask how much you've lost, just be vague and say, "I'm not sure". We are used to only getting noticed for how big we are, so when we start becoming smaller we associated it with negative feelings- it still feels weird. It's all part of getting used to your new life and new body! Be proud, you're rocking this!0
