Joyful June
themedalist
Posts: 3,218 Member
I’m running low on joy right now. Given the news and the pandemic, I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling that way. But even in the worst of times, there are good things all around us and things to be grateful for. So this month, I’m doing a #JoyfulJune challenge. A daily dose of good things! Please join me!
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I like how today's challenge is to DECIDE to look for what's good in our lives. Every change or new habit starts with the decision and a commitment to change. My happiness is solely my responsibility. It's on me to bring more joy into my life.
Today I heard birds chirping on my morning walk and there's full sunshine. My German Shepherd, Jack, who has severe arthritis is on a new pain medication and he's moving around better than he has in years. That's definitely making me happy! We're off to a good start!
Excited to be doing this and looking forward to hearing your stories!4 -
I like the day 1 statement. Taking that kind of ownership is critical, for your happiness and health. With what’s going on right now, my family has actually had more time together, and particularly for exercising together. Bike rides, pilates, walks...6
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Great post! Thank you!
Today I decided to smile at everyone I encountered. Even while wearing a mask. Made me feel good and those that noticed smiled immediately.5 -
Wonderful challenge @themedalist! Today, as I have been doing since shortly after the lockdown, I met with my sister, my daughters, and my granddaughters on Zoom to read the Harry Potter books aloud. We are all enjoying it - the high point of our day. Frankly, this is something we wouldn't have done if things were "normal."
@themedalist , I love hearing the sondgs of birds. Today on our walk we saw a hawk. - Pretty cool for the suburbs. So glad your dog is feeling better. I so appreciate the vets caring for our pets during this crisis.
@ihad, the exercise together is great. I'm seeing so many families out exercising together. I didn't know there were children in my neighborhood. Today a dad and two boys biked past us while my husband and I were out taking our walk, and the dad jumped a curb. I teased him about setting a bad example for his sons and he joked back that they would have to learn it somewhere.
It was a fun interaction.
@prgirl39mfp , I'm sure the smile shows in your eyes, so of course folks smiled back.
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This is definitely a great challenge for the month and I really appreciate you doing this Denise.
Today, I made the decision that I need to go forward with my life and be happy and unfortunately, that does mean changing my marital status. I have met someone and for the first time in so so so long, I am happy and making myself a priority. During all this stress ( extremely stressful things have happened ) I have still managed to focus on me and keep eating healthy and entering my food and weight.6 -
Much luck to you @jlperiard putting yourself first is always good.
Day 2 for me In terms of reframing a worry.
This are certainly scary times. It’s very easy for me to worry and feel anxious. Today I choose to be grateful. I am safe at home, food to eat, family that loves me. I find support and guidance when I need it in this group and other places. Keeping focused and mindful.4 -
My meditation last night was about anxiety, and it talked about reframing worry. I was surprised how much better I felt. Like @prgirl39mfp said, being grateful for my safety is indeed helpful. For those I’m worried about - it helped me to pray for them and trust God to care for them. I certainly cannot keep them safe.4
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Well put @77tes2
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I’ve been thinking about today’s challenge throughout the day. This is a toughie. I can usually reframe a concern pretty easily. but what’s weighing on my mind the last few days is my Dad. Next week will be the one-year anniversary of his stroke. He’s been holding strong to the belief that eventually his body will fully recover and he’ll be able to resume the active life he had before. That’s not going to happen. That’s what strokes do. They change the trajectory of your life.
He’s very frustrated that no one has given him a plan for how he can fully recover. I’ve tried to gently nudge him toward “Let’s see what’s possible” but he’s clinging to his former life. And he’s really suffering for it.
So the only reframing I think I can do is acceptance. Maybe over time I can help my dad accept where he is and start envisioning a different future. I’m not sure I’ll be successful, but I know I need to try.
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Wow, this is a big one given my current situation.
I guess my main worry is my girls and how hurt they were when they found out that our marriage wasn't good and the miscommunication and misconstrued comments in the heat of the moment.
**I guess the best thing is to talk with them together with my husband to explain the situation but the most important thing is to shower them with love.5 -
***BTW: if anyone had gone through a separation with kids and another man is involved, I would desperately love some advice and encouragement.1
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@jlperiard I am so sorry you are going through this. I have never been in that situation but my parents divorced when I was 4 and I still remember the day my father left. My mom and dad never again had a conversation but my mom took my dad to court all the time. That most certainly damaged whatever chance of communication they had and it affected me and my brother tremendously.
Your idea of talking to your children and include your husband in the conversation is the best you can do. Although you’re not married you’re stil a family unit, you’re still parents to these children and need to heal together. Wishing you the best. I understand it’s easier said than done.
@themedalist I am so sorry about your dad. It has to be so tough on him to cling to his old self and I don’t blame him. Accepting new realities specially for people from that generation can be tough. Recently heard a course on anxiety that suggests exactly that, acceptance of the problem or situation to make it work or more tolerable. Maybe you might need to accept that he may never accept it so you can concentrate on him being as comfortable as he can with his new life hoping he might have a change of heart. Wishing you both the best.3 -
For the 3rd day of Joyful June Challenge here are the 3 things I am grateful for: my health( This past January I was diagnosed with pneumonia, which led to a 5 day hospitalization; lots of friends and family are certain it was Covid).
A new mattress: I had mine for 8 yrs and it was awful. Thankfully we were able to get one and it has made a great difference.
Social Media: in times like these I rely on my social media to find inspiration, laughter and show support. I control what I see and read. Lots of motivational pages and accounts. Also to keep in touch with friends and family during the pandemic.3 -
@themedalist, thank you so much for this newest addition to the discussions for the Building Healthy Habits group. At least for this month as I don't know if you plan to include the calendar theme next month.
I have been struggling since December, before there even was the addition of the Pandemic and all of the the current situations in the news. It is good to focus on something really positive like joy and happiness. I like the June's calendar focus on Joy.
I didn't realize that it is soon going to be the one-year anniversary of your father's stroke. What a long year for you and your family. The situation definitely remains a very difficult one for you as you watch how your father is dealing (or not) with this continuing new reality for his life. Hugs for you.
Here are three things that I'm grateful for today:
1) On one hand we finally had some rain recently! And on the other it has been bright and sunshiny the last two days, but not extremely hot like it had already been, and it being only May. But then again I have seen it break the 100 degree mark in April before. So I'm really extra grateful it's not super hot outside today 😁
2) I'm not in pain today like I have been quite often, and definitely not like I was several months ago. So I was able to do some walking based exercise yesterday and today. And so far hardly any pain and not a lot of swelling!
3) That I was able to do the laundry and hang it outside today! I love hanging laundry outside, especially when there is a gentle breeze or especially when there is a brisk wind! Gentle breeze today!
I missed day two yesterday because I finally logged in late last evening after being away most of May. I didn't spend too much time reading the calendar closely or looking around on their website as it was getting later. I really need day two's focus more often these days.
Has anyone used the app made by the Action for Happiness website? Kind of curious.
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@prgirl39mfp, thank you! You’ve given me the reframing I needed. I hope my Dad can accept his stroke and envision a different future. But he may not be able to do that. If so, the acceptance falls back to me. I need to accept that he may not change his perspective and just try to make him as comfortable as possible.
Great suggestions to @jlperiard as well.3 -
Today’s challenge was so much easier! I am grateful for so many things and I always include a brief gratitude reflection in my morning meditation. It’s a great way to launch the day. My 3 things today: 1) my health and the energy and stamina I have to do what I need and want to do. 2) That my parent’s retirement community (500 residents) hasn’t had a single Covid case. Thank you to their super careful staff! 3) That it’s blueberry season!3
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@themedalist, acceptance may be the toughest struggle your father has ever had.
@jlperiard , like @prgirl39mfp , I too am a child of divorce, and I don’t think it was too hard on my younger sister and myself, but it was tougher on my older sister (11-12). My parents were always respectful to one another in front of us - I think that helped.
@texasgardnr , I’m so glad you are getting a break from pain.
June 3 - Three things I’m grateful for:
1. That my dear daughters are taking such wonderful care of my husband and myself. They’ve done all our shopping while we are self-isolating. I drove by the grocery store yesterday and saw the long line and it reminded me that it has been more than simply running to the store like I used to do.
2. That I was able to transition to teaching online with little trouble.
3. That a very kind friend is watching after my BILs house which we have not been able to look after.4 -
It's been good reading your posts and I've decided it's time for me to share. This June I will is a little different for me. I am making one little, very easy change every day until I run out of easy things. So far: June 1, I will drink 12 oz of water before noon in addition to about 2 cups of coffee. June 2, I will straighten up the bathroom after getting dressed every morning. June 3, I will have 1000 steps before noon. Tomorrow, June 4, I will take my multivitamin and Vitamin D every day. I will be adding one small thing every day that I want to be doing and will be able to do for the rest of my life and not quit because they feel too hard. All those little 1% changes will add up.
on a very personal note...I don't feel like me. It helps knowing that I'm not alone in the struggle for joy. But we have to keep working on finding what works for us. Today was a better day and I predict there will be many more even better ones. I have to look forward with hope and anticipation of a better world after this time when people are struggling in so many ways. It will be different but we will adapt. Hopefully there will be more kindness and compassion in the world.5 -
@themedalist I am sorry to hear that your dad is struggling so much after a year of recovery. When I first read your message about your dad believing that his body would fully recover from his stroke my first thought was "Wow, he's not a quitter"! Could it be that he's keeping the dream of going back to his active life becuase it's that hope that gets him up in the morning to do what he needs to do each day? Maybe that dream, however unrealistic, is all that lifts him up. Once you lose hope, what is left? Maybe with your gentle nudging to find things he can enjoy (while waiting for his body to heal) will be enough to soothe that ache he feels in the loss of his active life. Having your body fail you would be devastating, but losing hope in the future, well, that's even more painful. I pray for you both. There's probably nothing harder than seeing someone you love in pain, physical or emotional. Hugs to you.4
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@nebslp bravo!!! You are off to a great start. We are all in this together. Reach out when you need a little help. That’s what I will do!3
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@texasgardnr great post! It’s been raining here like crazy and although years past the beginning of rainy season turns into the SAD for me this time I will embrace it. Today marks the third day I sit on my back porch just to look and listen to the rain.
I don’t have the app but I started following them on FB. A breath of fresh air.
For June 4th, showing appreciation for those who help others, I will send a Thank you Note to the nurses at the hospital where I stayed in Jan. I was hospitalized before the pandemic so I can only imagine how hard it must have been for them during that time. Also will send some love and appreciation on FB to my friends who are teachers.3 -
June 4 - I sent a thank you email to the woman who collect data for the tutoring center at the college where I work. She has really stepped up when all classes transferee to online. I appreciated the prompt that reminded me to thank her.
And something I’m grateful for: Back in February I learned that my dentist was facing open heart surgery in March, and we have been concerned for him especially in the light of Covid. Well, he had his surgery the first week of March and is doing well although his rehab was slowed due to the lockdown.4 -
June 5= for some time now I make a big effort to smile at everyone I encounter. In my home country in Puerto Rico we do this all the time and when I moved to the US it saddened me to see how people just didn’t do it. It starts with me. So I did and to my surprise a lot of folks reciprocated. Out of 10 people 9 do smile back and that is amazing. Feels great. I sometimes dare to add a compliment “ nice shirt, great color shoes, etc” but not all tje time.4
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June 5, like @prgirl39mfp , I like to smile and greet people, and I also try to remember to express a compliment whenever I think about it. This morning as I was out walking, I stopped to compliment a lady who was having a stone wall put up in her yard. I told her how much I admired her porch, and how the yard would look even better once the wall was complete. The cool thing was that she then turned to the workmen and told them what a good job they were doing. So the compliment got passed on.3
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@77tes kindness always makes people feel better. I guess we usually don’t know how many people we touch by complimenting just one person❤️
@prgirl39mfp I think friendliness is a local thing scattered across different places. When I lived in Roswell, NM, (about 50,000 people) for a year to work after I retired I was always surprised at how so many people smiled and greeted me in the stores, on the street, and one person at a fast food drive through even me told me he liked my car. I was shopping one day and a total stranger carried on like he’d been one of my best friends telling me which donuts were the best and which ones were his mother’s favorites. People did this all the time. Even the children were polite and smiled and held doors open for me. When I returned back to my home area to the city I shopped in (30,000) I was shocked again. I went in Walmart with a smile for everyone like I had done in a Roswell and I was basically ignored. It seemed people went out of their way to avert their eyes instead of connecting. Rarely did anyone smile, no one chatted. I was literally in tears in the Walmart aisle because I missed the friendliness I had become accustomed to. It was a harsh adjustment. I like the Walmart drive up for many reasons, one of them being the friendliness of the employees who bring out my order. I’ll have to tell them they’re doing a great job and I appreciate it as well as saying thank you next time. Spread the love, as they say❤️
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Discovering the simplicity of drive up grocery pick up and online shopping have definitely been an upside for me during this time of lockdown.4
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For June 4th In the past I'd sometimes try to get to the curb and pull my trash bag out of the can to make it easier on the guys when I happened to hear them coming up our street. But now, since the lock down, I do it more purposely, and I also wait out there now, out of the way, and give them the thumbs up 👍 and call out my thanks to them. They always give big smiles and wave.
June 5th 'smile and be friendly'. In the past I've liked to give an occasional greeting to random people in the stores. Especially if they looked tired or sad. I also enjoyed surprising someone with a random sincere compliment. I try to do it purposely more often since the shelter in place and social distancing has been going on.
Speaking of... there is this cashier at the grocery store that always works in the self checkout area and she has started telling a cute joke to the customers. I enjoy hearing the people laugh in response and I always try to remember it to share with my husband when I get home. She has learned a way to spread smiles to the customers.
@nebslp, I agree with you...I've also definitely noticed very different levels of friendliness in various places that I have visited or lived during my lifetime.
June 6, piggybacking onto nebslp's grocery store example, my upside is that I go grocery shopping far less often now days. And that is ok with me. I'm out of the habit of going out for one or two items (which often turns into a lot more at checkout 🤦♀️).
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June 6th: upside has been having my husband home this long. For 3 yrs he worked overseas and out relationship was borderline breaking point. We’ve reconnected in so many levels. Grateful for that.
Also all the money I am saving on gas, tolls, cannot say the same about groceries since prices have seem to have gone up.4 -
June 6 - I feel like the lockdown has been a great practice run for my retirement. I have been a bit nervous about being home all day with my husband - that it would create a strain on our relationship, but it has actually been great. Thanks to this trial retirement, I think I will not return to campus when my school returns to in-person classes. I'll probably transition with online classes when I can get them. 4
