Winter Boyfriend or Girlfriend
pa_jorg
Posts: 4,404 Member
Article below from here: http://www.thefrisky.com/2014-01-07/dating-donts-consider-the-winter-boyfriend/
THOUGHTS?
THOUGHTS?
Consider The Winter Boyfriend
Technically, there are four seasons, but I like to think of Winter and The Holidays as two distinct entities. The Holidays are their own special thing — a whirlwind of lights and fun and being hungover at the office on a Wednesday. The Holidays end with a splash, making a champagne fountain and entering the New Year clutching the hands of your friends, or making out with that dude you winked at, then cornered at midnight. After the dust settles, the fog lifts, everyone starts to make their way back to their regularly scheduled lives — that is Winter.
Winter is long, it is the interminable darkness of three to four months until Memorial Day weekend. Winter is losing gloves on the subway and runny noses, and spending time alone because it’s too cold to get anyone to leave their house. Winter is a time for introspection, reflection, eating a lot of cookies, and falling into a state of weird, depressive hermitude that may lead you to consider the Winter Boyfriend.
Loneliness is a real, quantifiable feeling, and it amplifies in the period after The Holidays. Activities die down, social calendars quietly return to their pre-holiday state, and most sensible people enter a prolonged state of retreat. If you’re the kind of person who relishes your alone time, Winter is your best friend. If you’re more inclined to bask in the company of others, Winter is that ****ty part of the year when you end up at the local bar with that friend you don’t really like all that much, but are grateful to see someone, anyone’s face. For some reason, being alone in Winter is harder than most other times, and even the most stalwart person will fall prey to the want of a warm body.
That’s when the need for a Winter Boyfriend chafes, because, even the most confident, happy, pleased-with-her-life woman will question her need for male companionship. Even the woman who savors the shoveling of snow from her walk and finds watching television alone, in peace, an underrated pleasure will wonder. On a night when the temperatures dip below zero, and she’s staring at the air conditioner she has yet to remove from her window, she might find herself thinking, It might be kinda nice to have someone I could call to help out with that stuff.
If you desire a Winter Boyfriend, there are ways. A simple right-swipe on Tinder could net you the perfect companion for couch cuddles, Seamless-binges, no-strings-attached sex and a taller-than-you person to change the lightbulbs. The best thing about a Winter Boyfriend is that the parameters are similar to that of a Summer Fling — there’s a tacit agreement that the shelf-life of this particular entanglement is brief. The want for a Winter Boyfriend is born out of necessity, out of a need to fulfill every human being’s desire for companionship. It is spurred on by cold weather, the sight of dudes carrying winter weight and wearing a lot of flannel. The levels of commitment don’t have to be high, or particularly deep. As long as both people understand the rules, then you will enjoy a brief relationship that traffics in the pleasures of domesticity and the joys of almost-casual sex, awash in the mutual understanding that life is sometimes a little easier with a warm body around.
Once you’ve locked this thing down? The world is yours for the taking. The Winter Boyfriend gives you an excuse to stay in, to watch movies, to hang out on a couch in sweatpants and wool socks. The Winter Boyfriend is someone you can call to come over, but won’t overstay his welcome the next day. The Winter Boyfriend knows his place, understands the situation, and respects it. And, best of all, the Winter Boyfriend is a crackerjack way test out your romantic waters. If you’re commitment-phobic, recovering from a long and protracted breakup, or just aren’t really sure if you want to give up the many joys of being single and doing you, the Winter Boyfriend is just the ticket. It’s the relationship equivalent of trying before you buy. A Winter Boyfriend will help you figure out your feelings about being in a relationship, about how it feels to let someone else in, and what kind of sacrifices you’re willing to make. A Winter Boyfriend is training wheels for your Spring Commitment or Summer Fling. A Winter Boyfriend isn’t for everyone, but there are plenty of reasons to consider one.
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Replies
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Well, I've never thought of any kind of 'boyfriend' in the short term. That's what FWB are for, isn't it? :smokin:
Also, I feel far more lonely in the summer when I want to get out and do things and find that I dont have anyone to do those things with! :sad:
I also find sitting in and watching tv kinda boring. Let alone with someone that just see's 'me' as a winter thing! Cuddled up with someone I love and want to be with is different.
And besides, January is the month of birthdays, so I'm always out with my friends celebrating. :drinker:
So, my thoughts are not in tune with the author of that post, I'm afraid. Quite the opposite, in fact.0 -
Funny, I think each season has some of those cliche things that makes it seem like romance would be best at one time or another. But I do agree that I don't think of relationships as short term either though, so that part is a bit hasty.0
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Yeah, lets aim for Spring lover - that's usually a frisky time :laugh:0
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Yeah, when I get into a relationship, I don't think of it as short term. I go into them thinking they may all have potential for being long term and serious, and let them play out as they will.
Would suck to find someone you really like, but end in in the spring b/c you laid down rules ahead of time.0 -
I like long term better too. I think. Is over night considered long term?0
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Well....there is the guy that only has girlfriends during race season, as soon as the season is over, they are too.
Eh, I laugh. Yes I agree being cooped up winter makes me wish for more than I have. During the summer I can go outside fish by myself (albeit I'd like someone to go with me).
I can't do FWB. If I'm having sex with you I've got feelings for you. It sucks. I'll likely have a long streak of no intimacy, when actually really....all I want is to snuggle on the couch with a male counterpart, why *kitten* it up.....literally by having sex, and then getting feelings. Eh....I know I'm weird. oh well.
I suppose I go into all opposite sex friendships with the potential (unless they are married or taken of course) with the possibility of more. Again, the reason I'll be lonely a looooong time I suppose.
I just need a submissive. Let me call the shots, be the dom, and I'll let you go when I'm done playing with you. Oy how I miss that.0 -
I am thinking this is more something for the younger crowd (highschool and college) where most aren't looking for long term relationships as they will be transistioning into other areas of their lives in the not so distant future.0
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In my younger years I was "seasonal" and didn't really realize it.
I typically would have a "fall/winter" romance and was a free woman during Spring/Summer.
Live and learn.
*I was in a relationship with a guy in September, we broke up in June then the following October we got back together, broke up again in May. :noway:
We are still friends but he teases me in the fall if we can give it another try.
LOL 0 -
I like long term better too. I think. Is over night considered long term?
In my experience, overnight is long term!! hahaha0
