Meet Me - Sheena (longer post)
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SheRock05
Posts: 82
Hello,
So I have been using MyFitnessPal for years but have never had friends doing it or any form of accountability. I feel I need that. Here is some of my history. My anorexia and anorexia athletica began in 2004, the summer after my first year of college. In high school I played on two competitive softball teams and exercised 20-30 hours a week, easily. In college, I didn't play sports, gained the freshman 30! and freaked out. Since then I have battled anorexia, bulimia, and binge eating.
I live in Houston and joined a two-month intense out-patient program for borderline personality disorder patients (I don't quick have BPD, but it is the closest of the diagnosis). With 15 hours of therapy a week, I have nearly overcome my problems but I still relapse occasionally and have many relapsing thoughts. With crappy health insurance currently, I am not able to do my weekly or monthly check ins with these professionals to keep me accountable.
WORKOUT: Today, I have finally found a form of working out that I enjoy and I have a beautiful boyfriend who knows that I need to workout -- for my mental health and anxiety -- who helps pay for the classes while I am only part time working. I do Krave Maga 4 times a week -- usually the martial arts class 4 times a week and twice a week I also engage in the 30-35 minute META class which is conditioning and strength training. Two days a week I walk on the treadmill, uphill at 3.6-3.9 mph for 45 minutes (and occasionally I will job a little). I have a really bad back -- one back surgery and it has been suggested I have a second so I can't run much. Sunday I give myself one day off.
EATING PLAN: My goal is to net 1400-1500 calories a day, Here are my two problems -- I eat WAY too much sugar. For instance, I love Clif bars for heavy workout days, but they have 23 grams of sugar. I just bought two new boxes though. SO I was going to eat only 3 a week instead of 5 a week. On days I eat Clif bars I will have an egg for breakfast, and days I don't have Clif bars I will have a Special K bar for breakfast -- until I get rid of these. I also usually eat a little candy at home, less tan a serving through the day, and my nightly dessert is more than a serving. So I want to cut back by at least half on these random sweets and keep my dessert to just a serving or cookies or ice cream or whatever. I rather not live than go without sugar completely, so this is my plan to get started at least. I plan to start this on Ash Wednesday (March 5).
WEIGHT OBSESSION: To try to not be depressed about weight, I don't count calories on special occasions -- my mom's birthday bash, valentine's day, Christmas, a day of a wedding perhaps. Recently though, I have had one of these days or one day with a binge per week. Last weekend I had a Casino night at my mom's church, which we went to for her birthday, and I didn't track food. Then I did pretty good all week. And last night (I did start my period) but I have been craving Menchie's fro yo for a week so we went for it. My boyfriend knows when I have been obsessed about something for this long, it is better to fulfill the craving -- but I still go overboard. So I need to reduce these binge a free-be days.
MY GOAL: I am about 5'3" and have a fairly muscular body and medium frame. I weight 138 lbs or so and want to get down to 125-130 lbs. But slowly as I don't want to fall back into any disordered habits.
I need some accountability. Somebody to help look at my food and give me advice and suggestions. I will do the same for you. I want to meet some new people and I look forward to supporting each other.
So I have been using MyFitnessPal for years but have never had friends doing it or any form of accountability. I feel I need that. Here is some of my history. My anorexia and anorexia athletica began in 2004, the summer after my first year of college. In high school I played on two competitive softball teams and exercised 20-30 hours a week, easily. In college, I didn't play sports, gained the freshman 30! and freaked out. Since then I have battled anorexia, bulimia, and binge eating.
I live in Houston and joined a two-month intense out-patient program for borderline personality disorder patients (I don't quick have BPD, but it is the closest of the diagnosis). With 15 hours of therapy a week, I have nearly overcome my problems but I still relapse occasionally and have many relapsing thoughts. With crappy health insurance currently, I am not able to do my weekly or monthly check ins with these professionals to keep me accountable.
WORKOUT: Today, I have finally found a form of working out that I enjoy and I have a beautiful boyfriend who knows that I need to workout -- for my mental health and anxiety -- who helps pay for the classes while I am only part time working. I do Krave Maga 4 times a week -- usually the martial arts class 4 times a week and twice a week I also engage in the 30-35 minute META class which is conditioning and strength training. Two days a week I walk on the treadmill, uphill at 3.6-3.9 mph for 45 minutes (and occasionally I will job a little). I have a really bad back -- one back surgery and it has been suggested I have a second so I can't run much. Sunday I give myself one day off.
EATING PLAN: My goal is to net 1400-1500 calories a day, Here are my two problems -- I eat WAY too much sugar. For instance, I love Clif bars for heavy workout days, but they have 23 grams of sugar. I just bought two new boxes though. SO I was going to eat only 3 a week instead of 5 a week. On days I eat Clif bars I will have an egg for breakfast, and days I don't have Clif bars I will have a Special K bar for breakfast -- until I get rid of these. I also usually eat a little candy at home, less tan a serving through the day, and my nightly dessert is more than a serving. So I want to cut back by at least half on these random sweets and keep my dessert to just a serving or cookies or ice cream or whatever. I rather not live than go without sugar completely, so this is my plan to get started at least. I plan to start this on Ash Wednesday (March 5).
WEIGHT OBSESSION: To try to not be depressed about weight, I don't count calories on special occasions -- my mom's birthday bash, valentine's day, Christmas, a day of a wedding perhaps. Recently though, I have had one of these days or one day with a binge per week. Last weekend I had a Casino night at my mom's church, which we went to for her birthday, and I didn't track food. Then I did pretty good all week. And last night (I did start my period) but I have been craving Menchie's fro yo for a week so we went for it. My boyfriend knows when I have been obsessed about something for this long, it is better to fulfill the craving -- but I still go overboard. So I need to reduce these binge a free-be days.
MY GOAL: I am about 5'3" and have a fairly muscular body and medium frame. I weight 138 lbs or so and want to get down to 125-130 lbs. But slowly as I don't want to fall back into any disordered habits.
I need some accountability. Somebody to help look at my food and give me advice and suggestions. I will do the same for you. I want to meet some new people and I look forward to supporting each other.
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