How to be an Ally (for Dummies)
emzyfish
Posts: 40 Member
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting privileged behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting homophobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting transphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting transmisogynistic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting biphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting acephobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting queerphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting misogynistic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
(NB: This is the result of many frustrating encounters with allies-in-name who mean well, but who don't seem to want to carry allyship any further than "Prejudice is wrong!", even when it means addressing the socially-imprinted privileged/prejudicial behaviors they themselves exhibit. Also, while here I'm applying it predominantly to LGBTQIAP+ groups, it's a good, basic rule of thumb for allying with any group. As a white woman, this is my approach to being an ally to my PoC brothers and sisters. I cannot possibly know everything that might be hurtful, and I have been raised in an inherently racist society; ergo, I will welcome the opportunity to be called out on any racist behaviors, no matter how small or large, as a chance to improve myself and be a better human being and ally. I kind of thought this was common sense, but increasingly I'm seeing that it's really not.)
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting homophobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting transphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting transmisogynistic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting biphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting acephobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting queerphobic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
Rule #1: Do not get defensive when you are informed you are exhibiting misogynistic behaviors. The person you are supposedly allied with is trying to tell you something. Put your ego aside, listen, learn, and adjust.
(NB: This is the result of many frustrating encounters with allies-in-name who mean well, but who don't seem to want to carry allyship any further than "Prejudice is wrong!", even when it means addressing the socially-imprinted privileged/prejudicial behaviors they themselves exhibit. Also, while here I'm applying it predominantly to LGBTQIAP+ groups, it's a good, basic rule of thumb for allying with any group. As a white woman, this is my approach to being an ally to my PoC brothers and sisters. I cannot possibly know everything that might be hurtful, and I have been raised in an inherently racist society; ergo, I will welcome the opportunity to be called out on any racist behaviors, no matter how small or large, as a chance to improve myself and be a better human being and ally. I kind of thought this was common sense, but increasingly I'm seeing that it's really not.)
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