Weighing my options
Hildabean
Posts: 71 Member
Hello! I am a yo yo dieter...I lose 25lbs gain 25lbs. I am currenty 283lbs. What has brought me to possibly go and do a WLS is I went to my orthopedic Dr with hip trouble from when I was in a car accident 7yrs ago. The found a tear in my hip. They can operate to repair but they will not do it for someone over the BMI of 40 (mine is 47). I was gestational diabetic with both kids and they have called me off and on border line diabetic. Not only my hip has trouble but other parts are having difficulty also....all due to weight. I have been off and on thinking about WLS but always turned away due to money. Right now I have 2 insurances and mine will cover 80/20 and hubby's says nothing for the actual surgery but may pay for hospital stay. I have two young children (6 and 2) and just turned 40yrs. I want a better life...so is this the right decision for me? I have my first visit with the WLS Dr tomorrow to see. The only option of the 3 WLS I will go with is the sleeve. Not liking the other two.
So what are your thoughts after seeing my thoughts? I would love to hear them.
So what are your thoughts after seeing my thoughts? I would love to hear them.
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I spent years yo-yo dieting, until I got up to 382 lbs. I knew I had to do something, so I looked into WLS. I was scared, I thought if I had to resort to WLS I was a failure, I was afraid I might fail even after WLS, but mostly I was afraid of what my life would be like if I didn't do it. I have absolutely no regrets about having the surgery, except that I wish I would have done it sooner!!! I have gotten my good health and quality of life back and for me, that's what this is all about!0
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Well, I can't tell you if this surgery is right for you. I am in process of scheduling my sleeve surgery. What I did to come to this decision was research, research, research, join this form, talked to people about it and was surprised to find two people who used the same surgeon I am going to use. I was against the surgery at first because I wanted to convenience myself that I was disciplined and strong enough to do it without the surgery. I kept telling my self all I have to do is get focused. While in the midst of waiting for the focus to happen and stay...I entered the pre diabetic range, and still on water pills, and blood pressure pills at 37 years old. Have been trying to get pregnant for the past 4 years, have sleep apnea, can't fit an airplane seat, small toilet stalls, winded by stairs and walking short distance. I have lymphedema in my lower left leg oh and did I mention I have been overweight ALL my life. God forbid I have to run to safety my fat *kitten* would be screwed! So do I continue to live this way and look forward to the forthcoming insulin and heart attack by staying on my current path, or do I seek out a proven tool to aid me in my process? I have decided to use the tool! WLS doesn't make you skinny and healthy, it gives you a fighting chance of achieving and maintaining by giving you feedback when you make bad eating decisions, it helps to force you to modify your relationship with food by restriction. You CAN EAT AROUND WLS. So I know I had to make a decision to do things differently and be held accountable for my actions. Removing 80% of my stomach; permanently changing my body's relationship with food is a serious decision. I know that my will power alone without this tool has not been nor is strong enough to ward off my current health issues nor any future issues. My suggestion will be to write out a pro and con list and be realistic and truthful with yourself. If you are only doing this to be in off the rack size 4-8 clothing you will gain the weight back!0
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90% of this is mental, the surgery is only 10% of the process. You must address why you eat, not just what you eat. For most of us if we are bored/tired/sad/depressed/celebrating/grieving/someone dies/ someone got fired/holiday/family event/work event/church event/ bankruptcy, etc, etc,etc.... our default activity is eat. you have to fix this!!!! you can not medicate with food any more or you are wasting your time and money and risking your life for likely failure. WLS does nothing to cure food addiction. I recommend going to lots of post surgery support groups. This is SSSOOO NOT MAGIC. The surgery will maybe give you 20lbs of wt loss. after that every lb is based on your decisions about sticking to the 70% protein25% veg-no potato,5% whole grain for the rest of your life. Anyone can eat around WLS and 50% of pts do just that. But 50% change their habits and accept the new lifestyle and understand that there is no cure. you will always be in a state of recovery, you will ALWAYS have to watch your intake FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!! most of the competitors on that biggest loser tv show were WLS failures. so if any part of you thinks that this will be easy THINK AGAIN. I just don't want you to have any illusions. that said I am loving my sleeve. my food diary is open so feel free to look. you may find a lot of our food fairly boring. for most of us food just becomes fuel and no longer very interesting. on the other hand being a healthy wt opens up other interesting activities and dealing with our life instead of medicating with food yields a great deal of happiness and lowers our stress levels. Now when death and destruction come into my life, I cry, I grieve, I pray, I deal, but I do NOT eat. God bless and good luck
the only meds I take now are for reflux YAY!0 -
90% of this is mental, the surgery is only 10% of the process.
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. God bless and good luck
Beautifully written, Mango!0 -
At your age, I, too, had very young children, weight that just refused to stay lost when I lost it and increasing problems with my back and a I had a limp. I debate WLS, but only RNY kind of surgeries were available and they scared me. Also I worried because I had small children. My weight hadn't climbed so high yet, so I waited. Now my kids are graduated high school, off to college and all my weight did since they were smaller was get higher. All my orthopedic problems did was get worse. I became prediabetic and my BP climbed, for the first time ever.
I got the sleeve. I wish I'd been brave enough to get it sooner, but I just worried because my children were young.
But all any of us can do is our best from where we start. And that's the only decision you really have to make. What is best for you and your family from this moment. All my best to you, whatever your decision.0 -
Well Said Mangopickle. :flowerforyou:
Hi Hildabean, nice to meet you. Like any other major decision in life this is only one that you (and your Bariatric Team) can make.
I would encourage you to read a lot on this forum as well as do your own medical research.
My surgery won't be for a few months. I'm 49 years old. I would have jumped at the chance to have it done many years ago but financially it wasn't an option. I'm Canadian and this surgery wasn't covered in my Provincial Health Care plan till about 2 years ago, and there is a long wait here to have it.
This is a super friendly and helpful forum. If you follow it regularly for awhile you will get to know some people that had the surgery done a few years ago or more and you can ask them a lot of questions. Start threads on topics that you would like to learn more about. Perhaps there is a support group in your area that you would be able to attend where you might meet some people who have already had surgery.
I hope that these suggestions help.
It's nice to meet you. Take good care of yourself and be kind to yourself.
I look forward to seeing you around in the forum.
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I had my surgery in my mid 50's and my only regret is that I waited so long to do it. I can't speak to if this surgery is right for you, but I wouldn't try and talk you out of it. Here's something else I regret, I was the fat Mom. My kids never seemed to care, but I know they got crap from other kids about their fat Mom. So from a social standpoint, your children will be affected. But most importantly, my younger daughter has my body type rather than her Dad's. And she struggles with her weight just as I did. Reality is, she grew up with a fat Mom and that's what I taught her, how to be fat. I wasn't healthy, so I couldn't teach her to be healthy. I taught her how to be fat and unfortunately, she is now passing this on to her daughter. You getting a permenant handle on your weight now means your children will grown up with a Mom dedicated to being healthy and that's a much better example for them than I was to mine. As I watch my daughter make the same mistakes I did with her health, it seems to me that being healthy for your kids is the best reason you could have to do this.0
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Thanks every one for your encouraging words and advise. I went for my first appoint today to speak with WLS dr. I am a candidate for VSG. He wants to do a EGD first to check out my stomach. I talked it over with my hubby and he is on my page. If all goes well I plan on doing the surgery come January. My hubby will be able to take time off easier from work and we will have a couple of our bills paid off. I will continue to pray that the Lord gives me guidance on my steps. I am not a emotional eater. I just love to eat the wrong foods. A lot of my weight came on do to medication through the years. Its been a constant battle and just want a better tool to help me. Please pray for me. Thx0
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I will pray for you Hildabean. Sounds like you had a very good appointment. I look forward to reading more of your posts. Please stay in touch. 0
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I had been overweight to obese since the age of 8. I'm 47 now. My father died at 54 from "morbid obesity", (yes that was listed as COD). I managed to carry the extra weight pretty well up until I turned 40. I also have hip issues, congenital hip displasia so I'm losing cartilage every day. With a BMI of 37, I had high blood pressure, only moderately controlled on 2 meds, high cholesterol, on meds for that too, asthma, not controlled on many meds, and was borderline diabetic. It hurt my hips to exercise so I just didn't.
I was sleeved 8 months ago after 9 months of preparation required by my insurance. My only regret is that I didn't do it sooner! Today, I'm 5 pounds form my first goal of 145 pounds and wearing a size 6! I take only Omeprazole, that "asthma" was mostly reflux, properly diagnosed by my pre-op EGD, small hernia fixed with my sleeve procedure. I enjoy normal cholesterol, blood sugar and occasionally struggle with LOW blood pressure! (When it's low I up my fluids and include some G2). I exercise 5 x per week on a stationary bike. Good workout, but doesn't exacerbate my condition.
My procedure was textbook. I was out of the hospital in 24 hours and back to work the next week. I enjoy the freedom to eat what I like now in very small quantities. I can't say it isn't "work", it is. I have to stay on top of my new nutritional requirements and maintain an exercise regimen. If I over do it with food even by a bite or 2, my "shock collar" kicks in and kicks it out. Not fun. But I'd do it again in a heart beat! Do you r research and good luck in your decision!0 -
Thanks every one for your encouraging words and advise. I went for my first appoint today to speak with WLS dr. I am a candidate for VSG. He wants to do a EGD first to check out my stomach. I talked it over with my hubby and he is on my page. If all goes well I plan on doing the surgery come January. My hubby will be able to take time off easier from work and we will have a couple of our bills paid off. I will continue to pray that the Lord gives me guidance on my steps. I am not a emotional eater. I just love to eat the wrong foods. A lot of my weight came on do to medication through the years. Its been a constant battle and just want a better tool to help me. Please pray for me. Thx
Will pray! Trusting God to lead you where He wants you to go.0 -
I am in the process of going thru the steps to a fall surgery. I think your honest, realistic view of how life will be if we want to stay healthy is invaluable. Even though I have a long history of being compliant with weight loss programs over many months, my biggest fear is that I will gain the weight back.
I have started living the life now and have used MFP for a long time. My husband and I have made a lot of accommodation to be able to have this surgery and I don't want to let myself and hubby down. I just need to commit to living within the rules each day.0 -
Based on your physical issues you sound like a perfect candidate for WLS surgery, however you have to be mentally prepared and committed to the process. I am also a yo-yo dieter, I could lose the weight but then I'd gain it back and then some. I'll be 40 this year and I finally decided I was ready to commit to a lifestyle change and get myself healthy. I had surgery 3 months ago, have lost 54lbs, it was the best decision of my life. I feel much better, have much more energy. I always say I wish I would have done it sooner but the reality is I don't know if I was mentally prepared to do it sooner. I think if your head is in the game and you're ready to make some long term lifestyle changes you'd really get a lot of out surgery. I wish you the best of luck!0
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I have been close to WLS twice, and there is a really distinct difference in my mindset between the two times. I am very glad that the first time fell through because I was not 'ready' to take that step. now, on the other hand, I feel much more prepared and ready to take on the life changes required to be one of the successful ones.
The first time, in 2011, I made it through the 6 month supervised program with my primary care physician and got insurance approval. Just before my first meeting with the bariatric surgeon, my company changed HMOs and it made no sense to continue with the program where the insurance wouldn't pay. then, I had come to the conclusion that *needed* surgery as my ability to lose weight had been demonstrated to not be long lasting, and as my hip deteriorated, I realized that my ability to exercise was likely to continue to decline. But I was *resigned* to the surgery, rather than looking forward to recapturing my life and health. I sulked for about 6 months, losing all control of my eating and drinking, gained about 20-30 pounds.
Fast forward to 2013, I decided to get my head out of my butt and do the things I needed to to recapture my health. I met monthly with my doctor, and after six months, was ready to move forward. Unfortunately, I had also gained another 5 pounds, which put me at the magic 50 BMI which resulted in instant insurance approval. So off I went to the first information session at the Bariatric program. The information session flipped the switch in my mind. I realized that this wasn't something to dread, but rather something to embrace and figure out how to incorporate into a successful future. I left that session inspired and with a plan. Since then, I have been a very good boy, losing 50 pounds, happily checking off all of the pre-surgery requirements and really believing that this surgery will open a door into a happy future.
Probably the best part of that initial session was when the coordinator required us to log everything we eat or exercise. She gave us a sheet with a number of options, and the one I chose was MyFitnessPal, which led me to this group. The folks here have been a wealth of information, real-life glimpses into my future and a safe place to share and learn. I give these groups (this on and the more widespread WLS group) a huge amount of credit for my success.
So, as usual, I ramble on too much. OP, I hope you spend some quality time thinking through your decision. No one can make it for you, and you have to be really ready to move forward. We can all share our stories and experiences, and I hope they help you with your decision.
Rob0 -
I am looking forward to surgery in the fall. I am also going to have the sleeve. I am scared but I know that this is a decision that I had to make. I looked into the mirror one day and realized that there was a fat lady staring back at me. I look at pictures and it is kind of like who is this person. I am 51 years old and take care of my 7 year old granddaughter who wants to always be on the go. I know that in my current condition (high blood pressure, sleep apnea and bad knees) I will not be able to keep up. I am looking forward to a healthier life. I am ready to make these life changes.0
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Im 43 with 2 kids and had BMI 37 after a significant weight loss and then gain over 4 years. I have diabetes, and hypertension. I had the vsg 2 weeks ago, I'm down 12 lb. off my bp med and 1 diabetes med. I was out of the hospital after 1 night and back to work 10 days after surgery. i'm still on full liquid phase, and feeling the restriction. I definately had head hunger last night, but was so full from dinner of soup with protein powder, that after one bite of the craving (a sweet indian desert) I was done!
I had to process the craving feelings though, I channeled them into making homemade yogurt.
I've been walking every day, with much less pain in my damaged right knee, and I'm cleared to go back to pilates next week.
I'm very happy and hopefull that I will meet my 80 lb wt loss goal and maintain with the VSG.0
