Jerks at Work Part 2

garber6th

How is it possible that after losing nearly 200 lbs, someone here in my office had the nerve to comment on what I was eating and told me it was going to put the pounds on me? Are you kidding me?

homerismyhero

*kitten*! I think there’s an idea that it’s OK to do that to women- that somehow women –should be ashamed to eat publicly without apology, and that our lives should revolve around how acceptable our body is to society. Most of us here who have been through is process of VGS- and basically- body transformation, while not without our body/ food issues- we now eat with a healthy focus, but that doesn’t’ me we totally abandon the idea that food can be enjoyable as well. The rest of the world still sees us as women who should be insecure to nourish ourselves, and ashamed to enjoy our lunch. Feminist lecture over – next time eat a yogurt loudly and seductively being sure to lick the spoon in front of the crowd that assembles at your desk.

garber6th

*kitten*! I think there’s an idea that it’s OK to do that to women- that somehow women –should be ashamed to eat publicly without apology, and that our lives should revolve around how acceptable our body is to society. Most of us here who have been through is process of VGS- and basically- body transformation, while not without our body/ food issues- we now eat with a healthy focus, but that doesn’t’ me we totally abandon the idea that food can be enjoyable as well. The rest of the world still sees us as women who should be insecure to nourish ourselves, and ashamed to enjoy our lunch. Feminist lecture over – next time eat a yogurt loudly and seductively being sure to lick the spoon in front of the crowd that assembles at your desk.

I agree with you, it seems women are a bit more susceptible to this type of comment/attitude. It's so condescending. I mean, this weight didn't JUST fall off of me, I have been putting in the work, and I have been making good food choices. I will not defend what I eat to anyone but I do resent being condescended to like that. I don't resent it enough to let it stay with me though, I have enough stuff cluttering my head. I just shot him my now-perfected "are you effing kidding me" death stare and walked away.

pawoodhull

I agree. Women are perceived differently when it comes to food and by other women no less! Reading the post made me wonder if they are being clueless or snarky? Are they assuming you might be going off the rails and want to help you stay on track, or are they secretly watching and waiting for you to fail so they can tell each other they knew it wouldn't work? It's really too bad we treat each other this way.

I am assuming you are rising above all this and ignoring the jerks. After all, with as far as you've come, you certainly don't need their comments or advice.

garber6th

I agree. Women are perceived differently when it comes to food and by other women no less! Reading the post made me wonder if they are being clueless or snarky? Are they assuming you might be going off the rails and want to help you stay on track, or are they secretly watching and waiting for you to fail so they can tell each other they knew it wouldn't work? It's really too bad we treat each other this way.

I am assuming you are rising above all this and ignoring the jerks. After all, with as far as you've come, you certainly don't need their comments or advice.

Pat, I really think this particular remark was from someone being clueless, but still... what's the point of making comments?? What are you trying to do? I think you are right that sometimes people do watch for people who have had WLS to fail for some twisted reason. We had a manager in from our main office who hadn't seen me in close to two years. He asked me how I lost the weight and I told him. He said, "Be careful, a couple of people in the office had surgery and gained some weight back". How is that helpful??? How about saying, good job, or good luck, or say nothing at all and just be on your way!

Fortunately as I have lost weight I have gained a backbone. I don't let ignorant comments or unasked for advice get to me on any serious level. People just truly puzzle me!

jkern9110

If only those Jerks at Work had access to your MFP daily food and exercise diary...they would feel like a complete *kitten* for even thinking something so ridiculous, let alone saying it out loud.