l have come to a realization
Hildabean
Posts: 71 Member
As I go through the process getting ready for a VSG I am praying to God to give me the sign that this is the route to go. And everything is pointing to the answer....to do it. I just had a video done of me for the ALS ice bucket challenge. I never really realized how large I have become until I saw the video that was made and posted on Facebook. I find myself disappointed in what my body has become. Sometimes I wonder why my hubby loves me looking the way I do. I also notice I do not look much into a mirror to look at myself. I do just enough to brush my hair and teeth but to really look at myself in the mirror that is another ball park. I am just worried if I am up to this challenge. I know it needs to be done, I know I want to do this....but I am afraid to fail like I have been for so many years. Does this feeling go away?
Thank you for listening
Thank you for listening
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Replies
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I really know how you feel, because I had the same fear. I think it's natural, especially for those of us who have failed over and over. It might be hard to grasp at this point in your process, but having the tool of WLS and using that tool wisely can help you be and stay successful. For me, after I had the surgery and I started to see the great progress I was making, it really gave me the momentum and confidence I needed to keep at it. I still have a little fear, but I think now it's more like caution than fear. I feel much stronger knowing that I was actually able to do this.
I hope you know that you ARE up to this challenge. You have had the strength to go through this process and it is not an easy process by any means. It's a lot of work on a lot of levels, but you are doing it! Your life is going to change for the better and you deserve it. This is really an exciting time and I hope you can start to lose some of the fear and embrace everything you are going through! I wish you the very best!0 -
I really know how you feel, because I had the same fear. I think it's natural, especially for those of us who have failed over and over. It might be hard to grasp at this point in your process, but having the tool of WLS and using that tool wisely can help you be and stay successful. For me, after I had the surgery and I started to see the great progress I was making, it really gave me the momentum and confidence I needed to keep at it. I still have a little fear, but I think now it's more like caution than fear. I feel much stronger knowing that I was actually able to do this.
I hope you know that you ARE up to this challenge. You have had the strength to go through this process and it is not an easy process by any means. It's a lot of work on a lot of levels, but you are doing it! Your life is going to change for the better and you deserve it. This is really an exciting time and I hope you can start to lose some of the fear and embrace everything you are going through! I wish you the very best!
Well said Garber6th. As I get closer to 100 down I am really believing in myself more and more. The compliments come daily as you meet someone you haven't seen for a while. That keeps reminding me how far I have actually come in 5 months.
Have faith in the tool Hildabean. Once you have been given this amazing gift, really trust it and you will trust yourself. It is a huge step but it is probably the most significant one you'll make in regards to your weight loss. When I start to doubt my ability to reach my goal (which I do less and less nowadays) I just remind myself, in my country and many others, not everyone has access to this life saving option. I and my family made a great effort in travelling and finances, so that I could have this surgery. It brings me back to the reality of what I have been given. I thank God every day for this gift. Go fir it but use the group for support because I think it will help a lot in your road to success.0 -
I am at the same point. Waiting to process through the insurance stuff is so hard and I avoid looking at myself. I see myself from the side and it doesn't even feel like it's me. Can I possibly be that huge?
Discouraging, but being realistic, I think, is a good step. It is me and I need to change.
Jan0 -
I think it's normal to doubt, especially pre-op. (Pre-op was the hardest for me as I felt very out of control and dependent on others for approvals, scheduling, etc. Just not an empowered place to be). We've all failed so many times, we wonder how in the world it can be different THIS time. All I can say is, it CAN if you let it. This is not a magic pill, but it can give you the boost you need to be successful. Once I'd taken off the first 30 pounds and I actually started to remember what feeling GOOD felt like, I wanted more. I started exercising and continued to track my intake. Today, I am at goal, (a bit below, actually and may drop a few more before I level out). While not an exercise "freak", I have a habit that starts my day now. I find it works better for me to do it before my brain figures out whats happening, lol. It gives me a few extra calories to eat the things I like and never feel deprived and has made me stronger than I thought possible. Who'd have thought that I'd be in the best shapre of my life at 47 years old? 1 year ago, not me, for sure! It's much easier to stay on track when you don't have the constant pull of extreme hunger. I still have to do the work, but I feel like I have a fighting chance at long term success now!0
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I really know how you feel, because I had the same fear. I think it's natural, especially for those of us who have failed over and over. It might be hard to grasp at this point in your process, but having the tool of WLS and using that tool wisely can help you be and stay successful. For me, after I had the surgery and I started to see the great progress I was making, it really gave me the momentum and confidence I needed to keep at it. I still have a little fear, but I think now it's more like caution than fear. I feel much stronger knowing that I was actually able to do this.
I hope you know that you ARE up to this challenge. You have had the strength to go through this process and it is not an easy process by any means. It's a lot of work on a lot of levels, but you are doing it! Your life is going to change for the better and you deserve it. This is really an exciting time and I hope you can start to lose some of the fear and embrace everything you are going through! I wish you the very best!
Well said Garber6th. As I get closer to 100 down I am really believing in myself more and more. The compliments come daily as you meet someone you haven't seen for a while. That keeps reminding me how far I have actually come in 5 months.
Have faith in the tool Hildabean. Once you have been given this amazing gift, really trust it and you will trust yourself. It is a huge step but it is probably the most significant one you'll make in regards to your weight loss. When I start to doubt my ability to reach my goal (which I do less and less nowadays) I just remind myself, in my country and many others, not everyone has access to this life saving option. I and my family made a great effort in travelling and finances, so that I could have this surgery. It brings me back to the reality of what I have been given. I thank God every day for this gift. Go fir it but use the group for support because I think it will help a lot in your road to success.
+1
I couldn't say it better than these ladies already did!
You can do this
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I really know how you feel, because I had the same fear. I think it's natural, especially for those of us who have failed over and over. It might be hard to grasp at this point in your process, but having the tool of WLS and using that tool wisely can help you be and stay successful. For me, after I had the surgery and I started to see the great progress I was making, it really gave me the momentum and confidence I needed to keep at it. I still have a little fear, but I think now it's more like caution than fear. I feel much stronger knowing that I was actually able to do this.
I hope you know that you ARE up to this challenge. You have had the strength to go through this process and it is not an easy process by any means. It's a lot of work on a lot of levels, but you are doing it! Your life is going to change for the better and you deserve it. This is really an exciting time and I hope you can start to lose some of the fear and embrace everything you are going through! I wish you the very best!
Well said Garber6th. As I get closer to 100 down I am really believing in myself more and more. The compliments come daily as you meet someone you haven't seen for a while. That keeps reminding me how far I have actually come in 5 months.
Have faith in the tool Hildabean. Once you have been given this amazing gift, really trust it and you will trust yourself. It is a huge step but it is probably the most significant one you'll make in regards to your weight loss. When I start to doubt my ability to reach my goal (which I do less and less nowadays) I just remind myself, in my country and many others, not everyone has access to this life saving option. I and my family made a great effort in travelling and finances, so that I could have this surgery. It brings me back to the reality of what I have been given. I thank God every day for this gift. Go fir it but use the group for support because I think it will help a lot in your road to success.
+1
I couldn't say it better than these ladies already did!
You can do this
Me too! I remember telling my boss that I was so scared to go through the surgery only to fail at this as well. I really didn't think this was going to be successfull until I was taken off my blodd pressure meds. :-))
You can be succesful at this. This is a great tool and as long as you go at it with the realization that it is a tool, not a magic cure, you will be successful. We all know this. Use the tool well and lose the weight. Keep using it and you will keep the weight off. Congratualtions on your decision and good luck with everything!
Pat0 -
Thank you all so much for the kind and encouraging words.
Just been in a little on the depression side (I have Bipolar) and sometimes its hard to think positively. I was told by my Bipolar Med dr that losing the weight will help with my disorder also. So that is positive news. A lot of this weight was put on by medication that they had me on at the beginning of my journey with being diagnosed Bipolar. I am no longer on those medications and have been "stable" for a couple of years. The darn depression still sets in and the Dr's tell me that it is normal blues. I just would like to see happier days. This weight really weighs on me (no pun intended). I just want to be back to my chipper self and have the energy to do things with my children. Its not fair to them either. My husband is just a trouper with me. He loves me no matter my size. So when he said he would support me with the decision to do WLS it made me feel good.
This group is wonderful. It helps to see the fears of pre op and the concerns post op.
Thanks again! God Bless0 -
As I go through the process getting ready for a VSG I am praying to God to give me the sign that this is the route to go. And everything is pointing to the answer....to do it. I just had a video done of me for the ALS ice bucket challenge. I never really realized how large I have become until I saw the video that was made and posted on Facebook. I find myself disappointed in what my body has become. Sometimes I wonder why my hubby loves me looking the way I do. I also notice I do not look much into a mirror to look at myself. I do just enough to brush my hair and teeth but to really look at myself in the mirror that is another ball park. I am just worried if I am up to this challenge. I know it needs to be done, I know I want to do this....but I am afraid to fail like I have been for so many years. Does this feeling go away?
Thank you for listening
Hildabean, Thank you for your honesty. You have written exactly what I said in the months leading up to my VSG. I was so afraid of failing at THIS too. I chose to get into counseling to work through some of the things that lead me to 284 lbs in the first place. The counseling helped immensely! I had my VSG May 5 of this year and I have NO regrets. I am now on my way to a happier, healthier me.
My advice would be this - be 100% sure this is what you want to do before you do it. It's permanent and it's not the easy way out. Listen to your heart and continue to seek God through it all. He already knows how this all goes. You will do well and in spite of the depression, you will succeed.
BTW - You are so blessed to have such a great husband! Kudos to him, too!0 -
I am in the final stages of insurance approval and have had many of the tests I need. I too asked God for a sign that this was the right choice for me. he just keeps putting this opportunity in front of me.
I have many of the same fears that many of you have. I think when you have tried to lose weight for 40 years, only to regain slowly until I was right back where I started, does something to you. I am really excited for a new life, but scared and apprehensive too. I am scared that I will fail, even though I have been making many of the changes now that will be necessary for after the surgery. It helps to hear from others who felt like I do know and they have been successful.0 -
Yes, it does get better- one of the best things about this is that as you become successful at weight loss, and over all better health - that internal dialog that runs through your head telling you that you're not good enough gets quieter and quieter until it finally shuts up… because there’s nothing left for it to say.
You are worth this effort, even now, at your heaviest- you are worth the effort that this will take. And while this body is important, because our health is important- your character is just as valuable, and that's why you are loved. Not because of how you look.0 -
I totally understand. I wont do the challenge (Have donated) because of the camera. I do my hair in the car....Im not fixy because of it. I am jumping through the hoops to get approved for the sleeve. I am waiting on a few documents to get turned in. I know it is not for everyone, but truly believe this is IT for me. I have prayed about it also. I had my Lap Band taken out in order to do the sleeve.
Whos to say this will work? I am! Its totally different this time. I have changed bad habits. I have started new good habits.
YOU CAN TOO!!!!! I know how it feels to wonder why your husband loves you.... Iv been there. I had to come to realize that I AM WORTH IT! YOU ARE TOO!! Hang in there, follow your gut. Usually its really God telling you something...... 0 -
Thank you all so much for the kind and encouraging words.
Just been in a little on the depression side (I have Bipolar) and sometimes its hard to think positively. I was told by my Bipolar Med dr that losing the weight will help with my disorder also. So that is positive news. A lot of this weight was put on by medication that they had me on at the beginning of my journey with being diagnosed Bipolar. I am no longer on those medications and have been "stable" for a couple of years. The darn depression still sets in and the Dr's tell me that it is normal blues. I just would like to see happier days. This weight really weighs on me (no pun intended). I just want to be back to my chipper self and have the energy to do things with my children. Its not fair to them either. My husband is just a trouper with me. He loves me no matter my size. So when he said he would support me with the decision to do WLS it made me feel good.
This group is wonderful. It helps to see the fears of pre op and the concerns post op.
Thanks again! God Bless
I don't personally suffer from depression disorder, but my husband does. He was diagnosed as clinically depressed. He's gained some weight in the last few years and I can see where that affacts him a lot emotionally. I've lost 162 pounds so far and that has allowed me to regain my mobility. As the weight has come off I find people started talking to me in elevators, on the street, ect. I figured at 386 pounds I was somehow invisible or something! But my one sister and my boss both pointed out that the smaller I get the happier I seem to be and am much more approachable than I ever was.
Weight loss helps us physically but I am here to tell you, it also helps us emotionally. As we feel better physically and I'm talking about healthy not how we look, we naturally feel better emotionally. Now, add in how much better we like the way we look as the weight melts away and we feel even better emotionally. At least I have found it to be this way myself.
Your husband sounds like mine in that we are both loved and valued no matter how much we weigh. My husband is also super supportive of the WLS and loves to brag about my progress. We are both very blessed women and doing what we need to do, to be healthy for ourselves, our family and those great husbands we have is a good thing.
Pat.0 -
Honestly, I'm 3 years out from surgery and have been quite successful at changing all aspects of my life, but I am still scared that I will screw this up and gain it all back and more.
I am a terribly compulsive eater, and like an alcoholic, addict, or someone who suffers from a chronic illness, I know that I will always have to put forth a great deal of effort to not be obese. My biggest worry is that something big will happen, like a traumatic injury or serious illness, and I will not have the energy and motivation to continue this lifestyle. I know that if I regain the weight I've lost with my sleeve, that I will spend the rest of my life obese. It terrifies me to think of going back there.
Every single day I recommit to being the best manager of my health, fitness and well-being that I can possibly be. Some days I do a better job than others. I will never be able to go back to eating whatever I want and laying around the house relaxing every day.
My life is a lot better now, so the effort is worth it and I don't have any regrets.0
