People that dont understand lifting...

symba1130

So I have only been at this for about 5 weeks but I shared my new program with a male co-worker. He doesn't understand why anyone would do squats unless they are trying to build up their butt (his words, not mine).
He also said something along the lines of "Arent womens muscles supposed to be long and lean?" and then he kinda caught himself.
I asked him..."Do I look bulky?"

Also a little back history on me...
I have always been a bit overweight, did the gym thing but mostly just talked to my girlfriend when on the elliptical, yada yada
Then I had my first baby almost 5 years ago and when she was about 18mths old I said enough is enough and put my all into loosing weight. It took me another 18mths but I was down about 35lbs and lighter than before getting pregnant, this was accomplished by eating at a deficit and doing lots of classes and running. I was the happiest I had ever been about my body and it showed. I was confident in all areas of my life!

I had baby #2 just over a year ago and about 2 months ago I decided to carve out ME time to get my body back to what it was and even better than before getting pregnant with #2. This time around I have decided to do lifting as my focus and I am only 8lbs away from pre pregnancy weight but its all in different places now.

I guess after all that rambling, my point was that I wish more people were better informed about what lifting can do for you. I have read so many success stories here on MFP and also looked over the progress photo's here in this group and they have all inspired me to keep at it. My husband has also been lifting for a couple years and even though his diet totally sucks (super picky eater and likes junk food) I am so impressed by the way his body has changed.

So what do you do when you come across these people? Do you try to inform them or do you just walk away?

ketoandbarbell

I work on people all the time that injure themselves and i try to tell them that lifting would help them, it strengthens all your body. They say they cant squat cuz it hurts their knees, I say, you squat correctly and it will help them. I have gotten one client to start doing bench presses and she is liking what its doing to her arms so far. Hopefully I can get her to get off the treadmill a bit more. :laugh:

I've also had a lot of clients ask if i'm going to be a huge body builder and i politely explain that women cant without "extra supplements".

BTW my hubz is the same with picky eater and junk but mine wont lift. He squatted wrong (ahem.. wouldnt listen to me) once and he hurt for 5 days.

symba1130

BTW my hubz is the same with picky eater and junk but mine wont lift. He squatted wrong (ahem.. wouldnt listen to me) once and he hurt for 5 days.

HA HA! I remember my husband doing P90X when I was pregnant with our first daughter, as I was getting BIGGER he was getting leaner and stronger. He tried several times to encourage me to do it with him post baby and I said "I don't want to get all bulky like you!". If only I knew then what I know now. It really shows that we all have to be ready on our own terms.

I also cant work out at home like he does, too many distractions for me (messy house, kids, etc) so I pay $$ to belong to a gym and I get up before the chickens to get there 3 days a week. :-)

spirit095

I hardly talk to people about lifting in real life. Most people I know don't do it and so I would assume aren't very educated on it. I've gotten tired of trying to dispel stereotypes lol.

I'll admit, but diet isn't perfect. I eat a good portion of "junk" foods throughout my day :laugh:. I do try to fit them in my calories, though.

berlys

Keep up the good work!! Don't let people get you down. I generally don't talk to others in my area about my workout program. Sometimes, they kind of make me feel ashamed of being in the shape I'm in and that I want to get fitter. My daughter was getting a hard time in school about giving up sugar and trying out the paleo way of living. You will get it everywhere! Just do what makes you feel good about yourself!!

ketoandbarbell

BTW my hubz is the same with picky eater and junk but mine wont lift. He squatted wrong (ahem.. wouldnt listen to me) once and he hurt for 5 days.

HA HA! I remember my husband doing P90X when I was pregnant with our first daughter, as I was getting BIGGER he was getting leaner and stronger. He tried several times to encourage me to do it with him post baby and I said "I don't want to get all bulky like you!". If only I knew then what I know now. It really shows that we all have to be ready on our own terms.

I also cant work out at home like he does, too many distractions for me (messy house, kids, etc) so I pay $$ to belong to a gym and I get up before the chickens to get there 3 days a week. :-)

I love that i work out at home. I do it when lil one naps at 12:30ish. I look forward to my "me" time. Although i do fold laundry during rests.

lizafava2

I don't talk about it much, especially with strangers. I *am* bulky - genetically - and I see people flash in their minds to "see, thats what happens when women lift", so I don't get into it. People who I know, I will talk about why I love it, and most people agree with me that its great I have found something to do that I love and that I am good at.

canadianlbs

i only told one person rl, so far . . . this guy i worked with who i really like, anyway. he started it by telling me so much about his own tiny little wife being all into Fitness all of a sudden, going off to the gym and coming home asking him to squeeze her biceps all the time (i've met her; she really is tiny and tbh really isn't that strong).

sounds patronizing, but it really wasn't because he was so happy about her being happy and proud of herself. we cooked up a plan between us that the next time i get together with them i would say something like 'gee, [name] . . . have your arms gotten bigger or something?' he said it would just make her day :happy:

so, naturally, when i started taking an interest myself . . . i told him, but i never told any of the rest of the team, who were also all men. and all lifters and paleoids and tough-mudderites. i liked them all and a couple are people i'd now count as friends, but i like to do my own thing on my own terms, a lot of the time.

MissHolidayGolightly

You should have told him that you thought men are supposed to have large bulging muscles and be cut, so what's wrong with him?

MissHolidayGolightly

I hardly talk to people about lifting in real life. Most people I know don't do it and so I would assume aren't very educated on it. I've gotten tired of trying to dispel stereotypes lol.

I'll admit, but diet isn't perfect. I eat a good portion of "junk" foods throughout my day :laugh:. I do try to fit them in my calories, though.

SAME to everything!

SezxyStef

You should have told him that you thought men are supposed to have large bulging muscles and be cut, so what's wrong with him?

hahahahaha...

I don't usually discuss it but most people that I do discuss it with feel the same way...that women get too bulky...hell they think I am too bulky now...eh I don't give a flying **** what they think...really...

But you are right they just don't understand it's for a lot of things and women esp who don't get it will suffer the consequences as they age...

amberj32

I've learned just to walk away....... It's your best bet!

katro111

I've learned to just not talk about my lifting even with people who are also "gym rats." One of my good friends is a personal trainer and I hate talking about lifting with her because she's of the camp that thinks you should do only circuit training with weights and do 12-15 reps (she considers SL to be a body building program for those that compete, not for those wishing to lose weight or fat). She told me I shouldn't lift heavier than 50lbs for OHP, is of the "eat 1200 cals to lose weight" camp, and once said on facebook "food is not to be used as a reward, you're not a dog" and my response was "food is fuel. your body is a vehicle. put fuel in vehicle accordingly" her reply to that was, "well, i guess it depends on your fitness goals". She's a great friend, but we clearly have differing opinions on fitness and I'm not the one who went to school to be a personal trainer, so the only ground I have to stand on is personal experience so I've learned to just shut up about what I do. Another friend who loves to workout asked me about SL and Wendler's and when I said they were progressive load lifting programs she goes "Oh I do that!" then outlined some circuit training pyramids. I just replied that that sounded like a good, intense workout and to keep going with it and ended the convo with that.

TL;DR I usually don't talk about food, dieting, general exercising or lifting outside of MFP.

MissHolidayGolightly

I've learned to just not talk about my lifting even with people who are also "gym rats." One of my good friends is a personal trainer and I hate talking about lifting with her because she's of the camp that thinks you should do only circuit training with weights and do 12-15 reps (she considers SL to be a body building program for those that compete, not for those wishing to lose weight or fat). She told me I shouldn't lift heavier than 50lbs for OHP, is of the "eat 1200 cals to lose weight" camp, and once said on facebook "food is not to be used as a reward, you're not a dog" and my response was "food is fuel. your body is a vehicle. put fuel in vehicle accordingly" her reply to that was, "well, i guess it depends on your fitness goals". She's a great friend, but we clearly have differing opinions on fitness and I'm not the one who went to school to be a personal trainer, so the only ground I have to stand on is personal experience so I've learned to just shut up about what I do. Another friend who loves to workout asked me about SL and Wendler's and when I said they were progressive load lifting programs she goes "Oh I do that!" then outlined some circuit training pyramids. I just replied that that sounded like a good, intense workout and to keep going with it and ended the convo with that.

TL;DR I usually don't talk about food, dieting, general exercising or lifting outside of MFP.

That's a really good point. There are so many ways to train and people tend to think their way is superior. I have a friend that does a split routine, another that does Tabatas, another that doesn't follow a set program, many that don't do warm up sets at all, etc. I wouldn't want to do their style and they think my doing 5x5 is hard so, to each their own. If we end up going to the gym together, I usually end up doing my own thing and maybe meeting up to bench press. No matter what, everyone always seems to bench press.

randomtai

I have learned to not share things with people.

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I have learned to not share things with people.

Pretty much this.

A few people know I lift because they asked "hey you look good lately, what have you been doing?" But I give out as little information as possible.

nassaugyal

My brother and husband lift so luckily I have someone to talk to, but I've been looking for other women to talk to because they're, of course, progressing way faster than I am (them being men, and me being a woman).

None of my female friends are even remotely interested in lifting - they're aspiring cardio-queens, and they all just look at me with blank-stares when I tell them I wanna be strong as ****. I'd love to have a female gym partner, but looks like I'm stuck lifting the boys.

MissHolidayGolightly

My brother and husband lift so luckily I have someone to talk to, but I've been looking for other women to talk to because they're, of course, progressing way faster than I am (them being men, and me being a woman).

None of my female friends are even remotely interested in lifting - they're aspiring cardio-queens, and they all just look at me with blank-stares when I tell them I wanna be strong as ****. I'd love to have a female gym partner, but looks like I'm stuck lifting the boys.

Even if they did lift, it's not a guarantee that you'd have gym buddies right there with you for your workouts. A lot of my friends lift as does my husband but we all do different programs and take different approaches. If we do go to the gym together, we mostly do our own things. That's why I like having an online community like this to and discuss our specific training.

canadianlbs

looks like I'm stuck lifting the boys.

me: *another 12-yo snort/giggle attack*

Llamapants86

I don't tend to talk about what I do at all. Every once in a while my co-worker will ask me if last night was deadlift day, usually this comes up because I am eating my packed lunch at 9:30 or something.

navygrrl

I don't talk about it much to people outside my family because they just look at me like I'm an alien. I still have plenty of pounds to lose, so I don't look like a "stereotypical" lifter, so my information tends to get ignored, because obviously I don't know anything. :huh: I'm just glad this group is here.