can't sleep then crash hard

maab_connor

so, last week, i was going to the store after work; and i came upon an accident in the middle of the road. i'm going to try not to trigger anyone here, so i'm not going into too much detail. but it was horrific. and i was one of two giving CPR to the motorcyclist who was struck.

he was DOA. but i think that even if he had been able to be revived, i would still be having trouble.

i suffer from depression, anxiety & insomnia.

but since this happened... i'm trying Really Hard, like tooth-and-nail, not to slip into depression. i'm seeing the signs up, i know the warning signs. and i'm trying to keep going. i'm forcing myself not to "den" the way that i do when i'm depressed. forcing myself to go out, to get out, to keep moving.

and then i go to bed.

i haven't been to the gym since the accident. i did go out yesterday with one of my best friends, we walked around a famous garden in our area, it was part of both of us forcing ourselves out of depression. but that's the ONLY work out i've gotten.

in a normal week - i go to bed at 10. it takes me between 40 and 60 minutes to make my brain shut up enough to go to sleep. then i get up at quarter of six and go to the gym. Sundays i will crash - sleep until my body wakes on its own. this is how it's always been with me. go hard, crash hard.

but now, it's taking me nearly two hours to really get to sleep. and once i do, it's like a crash sleep every time. thus the missing the gym.

i don't want to go to sleeping pills - i'm also a recoving addict - and none of my regular tricks are working.

i want to push through this. but am i asking too much of myself? should i force this or should i just cut myself some slack until i can fall back into routine naturally?

has anyone here been through this?

ravenclawseekergirl

I cant say that i've been through something like this or that i fully understand the situation that you're in (british girl sturggling to understand terminology), but i think that i've got an idea of what's going on.

When i have trouble sleeping due to my hallucinations or being overstimulated, i get out a really boring book and start reading. My suggetions include, the Bible which is pretty heavy going , some shakespeare or some other old boring thing . After two pages ZZZzzzz.
i know that ths sounds pretty obvious but if you dont already have one, set up a bedtime routine. It's been proven that a routine helps your mind switch off.

It might help you to talk about what went on as it's obviously still on your mind... or if that's not your style write it down. At least let it out somehow. I know that i find it very hard to talk about things, a lot of the time i get words mixed up or cant make my sentences make any sense when actually talking. Writing something down can be freeing especially as you dont have to let anyone else see it.
I hope what i've just said makes sense and that it helps you in some way...

PlanetVelma

Have you tried melatonin? I tried that recently and it really helped me relax and fall asleep w/out waking up feeling all drugged up. Blech. I hate that!

i agree with ravenclawseeker, try to do some journaling before bed and make a "wind down" routine.

I read somewhere you should have basically an hour to get ready for bed. Something like this: 20 min to wrap up the days "stuff"; 20 min of hygenic routine (shower, etc...); 20 min of "wind down" time.

You may want to consider getting up/going to bed at the same time every night, regardless if it's the weekend. I do that to some extent. Yea there are some weekends I do sleep in, but for the most part I'm in bed or up around the same time everyday.