Why must people be so judgmental?

PeaceLuvVeggies

So, I told my mom that I wanted to become a Vegan once 2012 comes in because by then I'll be living with her and working again [basically getting my life back together] so I can buy my own stuff and finally live a Vegan lifestyle. Anyway, her friend was there, and tried talking me into not eating vegan and said there are many proteins and supplements you need, etc. I said to her, you can get a lot of proteins and supplements from certain vegan foods and if you don't like the foods, you can just take vegan protein shakes and pills, etc. She then went on to talk about how much she loved chicken and pork. I didn't ask you any of that. Why must people be so hard-headed and judgmental?

chrissi_k

Don't let it get to you. I think it is just something we all will have to face over and over again. You tell them you are a vegan or vegetarien and some people will start right away trying to change you and make you eat meat.

I just tell them you don't tell me what to eat and I won't tell you what to eat either. I don't judge you, so don't judge me. My husband is a meat eater and could never live without it. I am not happy about it, but I won't force him to live my lifestyle.

I hope they will stop trying to tell you what to eat etc...

What I have noticed too is that if you show a non-vegetarian/vegan pictures of how the animals get killed etc they all of a sudden go: no don't show me, that is so terrilbe.

dogsetmoi

Get used to it! I avoid talking about my dietary choices if possible (in social settings). It's sort of like politics and religion...people can be very one-sided and self righteous.

On the other hand, plenty of vegans & vegetarians can get preachy, too! A lot of my vegan friends are like this, and it can be tiresome. We don't have to talk smack on omnis ALL the time.

Treat it like everything else, it's your business, nobody else's. And if you so happen to end up healthier and happier on the other side, so be it

ericrushton

People instinctively try to maintain cultural norms by pulling others back into the status quo. Take comfort that you're a pioneer

Plingie

What I find hard is that people ask me why I'm a vegetarian and then don't want to know the answer! I don't want to be preachy at all but I don't want people to misunderstand my reasons either. I hate having to justify it also.

And everyone immediately questions my kids health. Pre-vegetarain we had a so-so diet, eating meat did in NO way ensure my kids got what they needed. Now I'm a vegetarian they eat fruit, veg, whole grains, legumes, pulses and a MUCH bigger variety. I check every day to make sure they have had enough protein, B12 and Iron - how many meat eaters go that for to ensure their kids have enough?

So I think I'll start to say "my kids have had Xg of protein today, Xmg of iron, their daily intake of calcium and 5+ veggies. What has your kid had? " It may force them to think about what they feed kids and that meat doesn't = health. Meat+balanced diet can = health but not just meat and assorted other crap.

Also - if a really overweight person judges you for your diet choices, why not be rude and question their diet choices?

xtinalovexo

Everytime I tell someone I am a vegetarian they do the same to me. They sometimes make fun of me, tell me how much they love meat, and so on. I don't care. I tell them "Well, I'd rather not catch a disease from the hormones and additives to the meat with a history of disease in my family." I like to know what exactly I am eating. The people who make fun of me eat processed foods and hot dogs, It's like taking a health tip from Paula Dean.

People are intimidated by what is odd or goes against the grain and don't like people who are outside of the box. The fear of change and variation is common as well. For years the American society has been programmed to live a certain way and those who go against the sheep like pattern are outcasts.

I laugh at them on the inside and move on with my life. I would advise you to look at yourself in a more superior perspective, your knowledge, health and benefits are plenty and they just don't get it!

MichelleRenee13

The only time I ever commented to non-veggies is when they put me down for my choice. I typically don't bring the topic up, but people will notice by seeing what I eat at lunch or when we have office parties or potlucks. People have gotten nasty with me without me saying a word. I don't understand that mindset.

I do what I do so I can feel good about my choices and my life and so I can go to sleep soundly. People don't all see through the same looking glass, so the same things are important/priorities in each others lives.

Tis life...not much you can do.

BJPCraig

I think the problem is that people are too egocentric, and can't accept the fact that something is NOT all about them. So, if you become a vegetarian and they aren't vegetarian, what you're REALLY doing (they think) is calling them stupid and indicting them for their food choices. So, they feel the need to defend their choice to be carnivores and prove you wrong.

On a side note, one of my favorite personal comebacks from when I first went veggie was when my younger brother (who, of course, knows everything; just ask him) said, "Don't you realize that people spent thousands of years climbing to the top of the food chain?" I said, "Tell you what. Go to the zoo and spend an hour in the lion's cage, or go to the aquarium and take a swim with the sharks. THEN we'll talk about being on top of the food chain..."

Kymmy81

On a side note, one of my favorite personal comebacks from when I first went veggie was when my younger brother (who, of course, knows everything; just ask him) said, "Don't you realize that people spent thousands of years climbing to the top of the food chain?" I said, "Tell you what. Go to the zoo and spend an hour in the lion's cage, or go to the aquarium and take a swim with the sharks. THEN we'll talk about being on top of the food chain..."

I LOVE this! Could I borrow it for the next time I get one of those inane 'top of the food chain' comments?!

It really irks me when people say stupid things about it being 'natural' for us to eat animals....Yeah, good luck eating your factory-farmed, antibiotic and hormone-laden in-bred miserable meat....just how nature intended? Pffft.

SuperScrabbleGirl

When people ask me how long I've been a vegetarian and I say "23 years", I can just hear them getting excited in their heads because they presume my whole family is veggie, and they want to use it as an opportunity to preach about how cruel it is to raise your child vegetarian. Well, I have to disappoint them. 1) It's not cruel. 2) I'm the only one in my family who doesn't eat meat.

In. Your. Face.

rml_16

People don't understand vegetarian and vegan, so I think they're afraid of it. Fear begets judgment. And then there are people who can't imagine ever giving up eating meat so they think that everyone feels as they do.

ccgisme

For some reason that I do not yet understand, a person's decision to not eat meat often acts as a guilt mirror for people - it's as if rejecting meat is a rejection of them. Now, if we're talking about the person who makes or shares your meals, I can understand the reaction. When it's an acquaintance, colleague or total stranger, then I get confused.

It's true that a lot of veg*ns are passionate about the reasons they became veg*n and this passion often leads to preaching. I'm sure that preaching is a part of the response, but it can't be the only reason.

dtucker4403

I get a lot of mixed reactions when I tell people that I am vegetarian. It drives my husband crazy because he still eats meat and I have always cooked for him. I still cook for him, but I have cut way back on the meat I fix. And I don't eat any of it. He has however changed from eating meat from the grocery store to getting his beef from a local farmer who treats his animals humanely and does not use antibiotics and steroids. I think that's a plus.

If people actually ask me why I am vegetarian, I just tell them for ethical, environmental and health reasons. Usually they don't question me after that. But if they do, I tell them the books and movies I have gotten my info from so they can make their own choices. My extended family has gone out of their way to try to fix vegetarian food for me at family gatherings; people at work have done the same. They may think I am a little weird, but they are supportive.

randaface

I guess I am really lucky. Almost everyone I talk to are very supportive. Some are curious, and ask a lot of questions, but no one tries to talk me out of it or whatnot. My best friend is marrying a vegetarian, and her fiance knows that I am also vegetarian, and he made it clear, that i would get a vegetarian plate at the wedding, because he knows how hard it can be sometimes. My friends at work are always trying to help, even if they don't quite understand, lol... they have to ask, "do you eat fish?",or "can you have milk?" and such. I am lacto-ovo vegetarian, and that really confuses them. My mom is almost vegetarian, lol. I guess you would say she is "fexitarian", she doesn't eat meat often, but she will on occasion eat poultry or fish, she always makes sure there is something at family dinners. So like I said, I guess I am just very lucky.

InnerFatGirl

Ugh, I so relate.

TiffL22

I think people will always judge because they're afraid of what is different.

I don't consider myself "vegetarian" or "vegan" because I sort of follow my own guidelines. I simply tell people I don't eat meat, and that's only if they specifically ask. I got sick of dealing with being ridiculed and having to defend or debate my personal diet choices with anyone and everyone so I just don't discuss it anymore. Only with people who I am close to or those who I know are open minded and/or supportive.

eringrace10

My extended family really understand it, none of them are veggie but they get its my choice and make a special effort to make sure they is always stuff for me at family gatherings. My oldest sister is an ex-veggie, and cannot stop herself from ripping me to shreds every time we eat together. It really gets me down especially because if it was anyone I would be able to fight back, but because it's her I feel about 2 inches tall. Any ideas on handling her?

pdworkman

We get the same "guilt" reaction to a lot of our "alternative" lifestyles - adoption, homeschooling, etc. You get used to it.

AleciaG724

Same here - well said.

stef_monster

I've actually come to enjoy the confrontations I get when I 'come out' as a vegetarian. I used to avoid the topic at all costs back when I first went veg several years ago. People would get downright defensive and upset, as if me not eating hamburgers was a personal attack on their lifestyle. Since then, I've gotten a lot of life experience, research, and knowledge under my belt, as well as some funny comebacks...

"Rabbit food again?" "What's wrong with being a rabbit? They're more adorable AND they get laid more than you do."

Most of my family and friends have been supportive, even if they don't really understand it. I try my best to put my choices in a positive light without sounding preachy when people ask me questions about it. I know my diet isn't for everyone, but I do encourage people to eat more vegetables and non-processed foods.

I think that people who get that angry, knee-jerk reaction to people who are making a serious effort to live healthier feel that way because they don't want to change their lifestyle, even though they know they need to. It's the same as the people that say, "Oh, you can have a (insert unhealthy food item), look how skinny you are!" or "You don't need to exercise, you're fine just how you are!" To them, I say, "How the HELL do you think I got this way?!" They don't want you to step up and say that you're taking charge of your health, because that probably means that they need to as well.

Keep your head up and don't let them get to you! Be healthy and lead by example!

Telpa

Best to live healthy and work out, and prove the world wrong with your healthiness