Feeling Guilty

LGOllie

Okay, I am going to put myself out there and talk about something that bothers me. Often, when things bother me like this, I eat, but this time I will talk about it. It is not that complicated, really. I love the church that I attend, however a big focus of the church is reaching out to the community, helping at a homeless center, picking up trash in the inner city,etc. The service is just for an hour once a week. We have an option to attend a bible study during the week, and then, on most weekends, there are opportunities to serve. I love this concept and I would love to serve on the weekends and I feel guilty that I don't.

Now, come my excuses...I teach (preschool children who are disabled) at a time when demands on teachers and assessments of students and teachers are at an all time high in our country. Honest, it was never like this before and I have taught 30+ years. Many young teachers are burning our and leaving because of the stress. The point is that I spend about 10 hours at my job everyday with very little break time. Also,I am involved with after school day care at the school one evening a week for a few hours. I try to get caught up on the paperwork on the weekends. ( I don't know any teachers who do not stay late or do not take work home.) Thus, I am so tired to go out and serve on the weekends. I always think I would like to, but when the day arrives, I am exhausted. Also, I have a mom who is now in her 80's and lives nearby. I try to visit her at least once a week as well, usually on Saturday.

Okay, so I know that everyone has lots going on in their lives, and they still manage to find time for others and to help others. I am hoping that many of you will tell me your thoughts and how do you do it. What do you do? Is my thinking/feeling wrong? Am I being selfish? Should I push through the tiredness and go serve? Please feel free to be honest. What do you all do? How do you manage to fit it all in?

heatherdills

If you are serving out of guilt, then it is not really serving. If God puts something on your heart, then he will give you the strength and desire to do it. However, you ARE serving him by honoring your commitment to your mother and by taking care of children. It may not be serving under the banner of the church, but it sounds like you are serving. Try not to be too hard on yourself and try to see the ways you are already serving and honoring the Lord. You don't have to do it all, but give your all in what you do.

FuzzieJelly

This sounds like you already have a full plate. I agree with Heather. Try not to be hard on yourself. If God brings everything together for you, then it will be a "GOD" thing, but if not then its a YOU thing. Pray that the Lord will show you what HE wants you to do. In my opinion, if God brings you to it, then he will bring you through it. Hope that makes sense to you. You dont have to do it everything that makes you feel guilty.

yolste07

I agree with the others, you are truly serving right now when God lays something on your heart he has already worked out the details for us. Right now may not be the time but that is not to say later on may be the time. All things that are God ordained will when and how they should. Do be too hard on yourself.

Zee48

It sounds to me like you are already serving the Lord with your job and special needs children, day care and your Mom plus all the after school duties of a school teacher. And no I don’t feel like you are being selfish. Serving the Lord does not mean going along with the crowd but going along with what the Lord gives us to do. Pray about it and let Him lead and guide you then if you feel so led go volunteer with your church group. Otherwise continue to doing what God has given you and take care of yourself. Getting healthy is one of the things He wants us to do. You can’t serve him, the children or your Mom if you are constantly overly worn out.

premiumchilenita

The things you do in life are individual. Meaning that if you pray to God and you both have an agreement on things then it's ok, what everyone else does, doesn't really matter. If you are feeling uneasy about the way you are serving, then ask God himself to let you have a feeling in your heart that you are doing the right thing, if not then you will know.

I'm sure the Church puts up this program for those that do not have opportunities to serve, hence they get one by attending these activities. I once use to feel like you and thought I did nothing to serve. I prayed to God and asked him to give me opportunities. He showed me that I was already doing things.
He doesn't want you to burn out, he wants you to be happy, ALWAYS remember that.

LGOllie

Thank you, thank you for your responses. I am encouraged greatly!

gods_gal

It sounds to me like you are already serving the Lord with your job and special needs children, day care and your Mom plus all the after school duties of a school teacher.

This ^^ ... doing the will of God and serving others is not just when it's planned by the church. You should not feel guilty at all because your entire day is serving and being the hands and feet of Jesus to those precious children. My husband says it best: "I don't do guilt!"

LGOllie

Thank you, all of you! I can't tell you how much your responses helped me feel better about myself this week and see things more clearly!